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Caroline Flack found dead

999 replies

LittleScottish · 15/02/2020 17:39

Poor, poor woman...

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Dustarr73 · 16/02/2020 14:54

As for the "only hearing her side" we've just had the big #metoo movement and the #webelieveyou stance, meaning that victims should be believed, not doubted.

You know that only ever works one way.

I liked Caroline on the X Factor,thought she was really good.

But she was accused of being abusive,not to only i bf but the other one who moved to Australia.Now all over FB and Twitter its like shes vying for the sainthood.
The people i feel for are the person who left her to go to the shops and her bf.Hes not going to handle this well.I hope someone is there for him,otherwise i feel another suicide in the not to distant future.

sendhelpppppp · 16/02/2020 14:56

truffle everyone on sm saying there must have been a reason why she did it. Saying it was "just a mistake" etc. One poster on this thread suggested it was ok if she was drunk or on drugs and her bf was flirting with others. All different ways of minimising.

ShatnersWig · 16/02/2020 14:57

He didn't want to proceed with his complaint

Many battered women don't either. Fortunately where a successful prosecution is deemed likely and sufficient evidence exists the CPS ignore their wishes

Hearhoovesthinkzebras · 16/02/2020 14:57

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LittleSweet · 16/02/2020 14:57

Suicide is not a choice. I think her death has highlighted how inadequate provision for mental health is in this country. She was obviously ill, as demonstrated by her behaviour.

sendhelpppppp · 16/02/2020 14:57

nosharon yes, like most victims in dv cases because theyre scared shitless of the repercussions. Educate yourself.

Hearhoovesthinkzebras · 16/02/2020 14:59

Dustarr73

I completely agree.

APatchyTomCat · 16/02/2020 15:01

He didn't want to proceed with his complaint

The law doesn’t work like that. The law SHOULDN’T work like that.

AndThenThereWereSeven · 16/02/2020 15:04

There were some very good posts on the other thread. All gone because a few posters were determined to protest and derail. I read most of it as I was kept awake by storm Denis. I can't recall a single post that was offensive or spoke ill of the dead. It's quite mystifying.

There were a couple of posters at about 4am.

Hearhoovesthinkzebras · 16/02/2020 15:05

Can you give me some examples of all the people exonerating her @Hearhoovesthinkzebras as all I’ve seen is people expressing sympathy for a lost life.

Plenty of people on here saying how badly she was treated by the press, how shocked they are by her death yet no mention of her upcoming trial.

Celebrities on Twitter and Instagram falling over themselves to say how sad they are, what a great person she was - again no mention of what she allegedly did.

A poster on here suggesting that if both had been drinking and he had been flirting then it's not really that bad to have whacked him with a table lamp while he slept.

I think far more measured responses would be more appropriate. Express sadness but in a more restrained way and without acting like she's in the running for a sainthood.

TruffleShuffles · 16/02/2020 15:12

I disagree that the examples you have given are people exonerating her. You can have sympathy without condoning her alleged crime and as I’ve said to ignore the media’s effect on her mental health is naive.

I agree that one post that dismissed her actions as mutual drunkenness was unacceptable.

WatcherintheRye · 16/02/2020 15:15

Caroline’s crimes should not be airbrushed

Which crimes??

Hearhoovesthinkzebras · 16/02/2020 15:17

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Hearhoovesthinkzebras · 16/02/2020 15:18

Which crimes??

The accusations of DV, for which she was due to go on trial for.

edgewater · 16/02/2020 15:19

Anyone on Facebook, I suggest you find the radio 5 live page and listen to Laura Whitmore opening her show this morning.

Please, if you don’t have anything nice to say don’t.

To everyone who has said she was an abuser, going to prison etc etc. She didn’t deserve to die. She didn’t deserve to think suicide was her only option.

ShatnersWig · 16/02/2020 15:28

No one has said she deserved to die. No one.

BunnytheBee · 16/02/2020 15:31

Laura Whitmore’s show is online and on the BBC Sounds app. If you google her show, you’ll find today’s show. She spoke well about Caroline and was obviously v emotional.

coconuttelegraph · 16/02/2020 15:31

To everyone who has said she was an abuser, going to prison etc etc. She didn’t deserve to die. She didn’t deserve to think suicide was her only option

I haven't read every single word on this thread but I've seen any posts along those lines and I'd be surprised if anyone says that

NoSharon · 16/02/2020 15:32

No one has said she deserved to die. No one.

Ever hear of insinuation?

FrippEnos · 16/02/2020 15:32

edgewater

So we should just shutdown the discussion?

just because there is a difference of opinion doesn't = troll (name calling from laura whitmore).

no-one has said that she deserved to die or to think that suicise was her only option.

Piglet208 · 16/02/2020 15:33

I feel sad that Caroline Flack ended her life. Not because she was a celebrity, not because I believe she was some kind of saint or a perfect person. I feel sad because she suffered a trial by media. We don't know all the all the details of the domestic disturbance but some newspapers in particular went to war. Let's not forget that even if a person, male or female is found guilty of abuse or violence, we live in a country that does not support capital punishment. In other words, whether she was guilty or innocent of the accusations she did not deserve this ending. Nor did her partner, family and friends. What we do know is that she was vulnerable. I really hope this can be a lesson for us all to judge less and support more.

Bluntness100 · 16/02/2020 15:34

Maybe one of the positives to come out of this will be people feel more able to talk about mental health, depression, suicide, domestic violence more openly.

I worry that by making this all about the media and social media, and airbrushing out the very real issues Caroline had going on in her private life, that it will just drive domestic abuse and mental illness further under ground, something to be hidden.

So many people are ashamed of any violence they suffer in the home. They don't speak out. This is particularly true of men. If a high profile woman is accused of a violent assault and it is white washed out of her history, that it should never have been brought to trial, then it is very damaging.

The same for mental health issues. The impacts of depression. What it means or can mean for the person who suffers as well as their families. These things cannot be glossed over like they are irrelevant. It is too damaging.

There will be men who are being abused, women who are being violently assaulted, by a partner who suffers from depression, who may be suicidal or expresses they are, who read all these out pourings and all they will think is "I can't tell"

Hopefully as this settles down, people can feel more open to talk about these issues, to not hide them away, to broaden understanding.

BunnytheBee · 16/02/2020 15:34

People might not be saying she deserved to die but some people seem unable to acknowledge the tragedy this is without referencing the allegations and rumours against her as if that takes away from the challenges she was facing and from how sad it is that a successful, attractive 40-year old woman felt her best option was to take her own life.

TruffleShuffles · 16/02/2020 15:35

@Hearhoovesthinkzebras the media is a huge part of many celebs jobs. Having to court it to boost the profile of your activities should not allow people to abuse you to the point of suicide. That is not just in the case of Caroline Flack, two other ex love islanders have committed suicide with one being very open about their struggles with trolling.

I’m sure that their friends and family don’t see being driven to suicide as a lesson well learned.

FrippEnos · 16/02/2020 15:36

Bluntness

We can only hope.