Just made a massive fool of myself

[pyjamas89]

Walked out to the carpark with a colleague as Ieft the office this evening. Approaching my car noticed some bad damage to one side where someone has presumably driven into it. I was having a rant and my colleague was making the right kind of sympathetic noises. My colleague headed off and I then found I couldn't open my car door... Because it wasn't my car!

I'm switching between my cheeks burning to thinking it's hilarious to being delighted I won't have to pay to have it mended! Please come and make me feel less silly by regaling me with tales of your moments of making a fool of yourself?!

I’ve got that thing where you don’t recognise people if they are not in the usual place.
Years ago arrived at airport,
walked up to my dad,
gave dad a kiss & one of my bags to hold,
realised it wasn’t my dad but a total stranger.
Tried to hide my embarrassment, not easy, especially as the man didn’t speak any English & clearly thought I was a lunatic!

Dp was a few feet away absolutely pissing himself laughing like a bastard

Some kids once knocked on the door offering to wash my car for £3. I pointed out my car, they did a great job, I paid them and off they went. Except I’d shown them to the wrong car! Whoever’s car it was must have been chuffed to bits that it was so lovely and clean!

I went into work ranting to my colleague about how ‘some wanker’ had parked diagonally in a space meaning I couldn’t get in the space next to them and making me late while I looked for another space.

The ‘wanker’ was her!

@pyjamas89

LOL!

Funny this thread coming up!!!

On Monday this week, I logged onto my online account at the doctors, to try and order a prescription. I have 5 different meds, and only ONE was on there. I was so worried and a bit pissed off as I needed this one med that had disappeared! (with 3 others!)

So I rang them, and waited 20 minutes on the line, as they were busy and had a moan at the receptionist about my missing meds (not horrible to her, but just a bit stressy and moany.) She was very sympathetic, said she doesn't know what has happened.

She made an appointment for me to see the doctor 4 days later (lucky cancellation,) as the doctor is he only one able to put the other 4 meds back on my account. She also put a request in for my med, so I would still be able to get it the next day.

I got off the phone, and went back to my laptop, (with my account still up on the prescriptions page,) and glanced at the top right of the page.

It was my husband's account. I had logged into his account. (And he only has one med.)

I do most of the admin in our house, and have his details as I usually order the prescriptions and make the appointments for the two of us..... So I had logged into HIS account.

I know DH's login details. (I can't get into his medical record as he has a PIN for that, but I can get into appointments and prescriptions...)

Logged into mine and all was fine. All 5 meds of mine were there! I waited a few hours and then cancelled the appointment the receptionist made.

#EEJIT

p.s. Obviously the one med DH is on, is one I am on too!

I topped up with petrol, paid, and came out of the kiosk and got into my car at about 8pm on NY eve in the very remote area where we live.
As I went to put my key in the ignitionIi noticed the lady in a full burqua sitting in the passenger seat. She was fully engrossed in her phone and fortunately didnt get a fright by noticing me, before I hightailed it out.

I then got into my own car where my two teenage kids were crying with laughter - they will NEVER let me forget it.

That's hilarious OP! I once started a new job and had the impression a particular colleague thought I was a bit ditzy. One day I took my phone out of my bag then unsurprisingly when I hunted for my phone in my bag couldn't find it. Colleague asked if I was OK as I was probably a bit frantic. I explained I lost my phone. I then for some reason started trying to call my phone from my phone which was still in my hand. I explained to my colleague that the number was unreachable and it had probably been stolen and turned off. He looked confused and asked whether the object in my hand which I was using to try and call my phone wasn't in fact my phone. I don't think his impression of me improved that day!

NoseyBuggerMummy that did make me laugh, thank you!

I thought I'd given the man in the shop the folded fiver from my bag pocket but it was a strawberry flavoured condom.

I did the same as you OP but in a public car park. My car was new (to me) and there was loads of scraping damage to the rear panel. And I had the teenager with me. Sympathetic lady commiserated with me.
Whilst checking the rest of the car for damage I noticed the undamaged (and a slightly different colour) car of the same model next to it. My car in fact.

I once got locked into my car. The locks were being a bit dodgy and I wanted to open the bonnet and check the battery, got into the car (parked outside my house) and shut the door, then found not only would the bonnet lever not work, but the doors wouldn't open.

It was a really hot day and I started thinking I might die in there (couldn't open the windows either) so I thought maybe I could climb over and see if I could open the boot from the inside somehow.
It got to the point where I had removed the back shelf and was doing a bum in the air headstand from the back seat into the boot trying to open it and shouting 'help' every so often.

Fortunately my lovely neighbour who. bless her heart, had just had a baby came out of her house carrying the newborn and said 'do you need help' I told her I was locked in (by this time I was purple in the face and dripping with sweat) she tried the front door handle and the bastard thing opened straight away.

She obviously now thinks I am a complete loon (but astonishingly still speaks to me )

Nosey You win, LMFAO. My sister and I once unpacked all of our shopping into the boot of her car at the supermarket. We then got in and as I chucked my handbag on the back seat I enquired as to why she had a child's car seat in the back. No idea how her key opened someone else's car ( a fiesta, 30 years ago) . We unpacked that boot in record time!

My best offer is a pal who'd just moved to the UK and ordered a hired Mercedes SLK to be delivered to her until she'd sourced her own new wheels - she's a big car geek and has the money to match, so tends to be pretty demanding fussy

Unsurprisingly she wasn't best pleased to see a Fiat 500 pull up at the end of her drive; all the same she perhaps didn't need to be quite so strident about what a piece of crap it was and how they'd have to pay her to drive something like that

Especially as it turned out to be her new neighbour in his own equally new car, who'd just stopped by to say hello

I’ve had a couple of Fiat 500s so I’ve a lot of experience of thinking someone else’s car was mine!

Once I went to collect something I’d bought on eBay. The chap helped me put it in the boot. I then got in the passenger seat of my car and closed the door. . Then had to get out and get in the driver’s side being all like ‘what am I like?’ Shudder

A lady tried getting in our car once, but while we was sitting in it at Sainsbury's

She was confused for afew seconds, then realised, she said she does it all the time.

Once, i stroked my partners, Brother instead of him.... 😂
Surprised his wife wasn't told, she wouldn't of been happy 😂

Oh, and on two occasions - a year apart, and at different fuelling stations - I have filled up and driven off without paying.

First time I realised it a mile down the road. I shot back, and said 'I am soooo sorry!' Turns out they hadn't noticed! (They would have eventually, but it was only a couple of minutes later.) They just laughed and took my money!

Second time I did it, I got home before I realised! It was Sainsbury's petrol station, and it was 10 minute drive home. I rang them quickly (so it was about 15 minutes after I filled up by the time I spoke to the petrol station.)

The woman who answered said they had noticed it, but knew I was a regular customer (of the petrol station and the store,) so they held back on taking any kind of action in the hope I would contact them soon! (Which I did.) I went back and paid

This was all 10-11 years ago. Not sure what would happen now.

My life has been full of these moments! One of the worst, ever, happened in Waitrose. I had a French Stick in my basket, and was leaning over a freezer to grab something for dinner, when I heard a male voice saying Madam, would you be careful what your doing with your French Stick? I stood up to see my French Stick planted firmly between his legs. I was more than mortified. I apologised profusely and hurried away. To get change the French Stick. Well, I wasn't going to eat THAT one, was I? Luckily, he seemed to find it highly amusing. I didn't go back to Waitrose for weeks .......

In a queue at a stately home. Then boyfriend - now dh - grabs my bum from behind. I turn and crossly say without thinking ‘I hope that was you!’ and accidentally catch the eye of the elderly lady standing beside me with her equally elderly male partner. She arched her eyebrows and said ‘it wasn’t us dear’. I had to try and avoid them for the rest of the tour.

One of my first trips as a new driver. I parked slightly blocking a drive (would only be stopped for a few seconds) and went to quickly post an invite through a friends letter box. Just then, their neighbour returned home so I rushed back to move my car and jumped in the passenger seat. I was too ashamed to get out the car again so just rolled over the gear stick to make my escape.

I tried to get into the wrong car recently. Same make and model. My 9yo patiently explained that the number plate was different after much huffing and puffing from me trying to unlock it 🙄😁

I used to be a dog walker.. My dogs owner was off sick so didn't need to lock the door. Arrived back and accidentally walked in to the next door house... Owner came out (I know him) we both looked at each other in surprise and said "Oooh!" I then fled next door!

@Mintychoc1 please tell me you did pay the kids though? As they obviously did a cracking job

I was once staying at my sister's flat in London after a night out, they weren't there. It was late, I was a bit drunk.

First I couldn't remember the code to the main gate so had to text and ask for it, then I couldn't get the key to open the front door to the block.

I called my sister, it was about 1am. No idea what I thought she could do, but she couldn't do anything. Eventually I gave up and sat on the step - to realise it was the wrong block. Their flat was facing me.....

In a farmer's market my DP whispered about one of the stallholders who was selling loose leaf tea which I love "he looks like he would dip his willy in the tea caddy". Only it wasn't me he was whispering to. It was an older lady who giggled at his comment. I'd moved onto another stall.

I was driving to Wales and I picked up a hitchhiker. We chatted, and when I let him out at Plas-y-Brenin asked him where he was from, as I couldn't place his accent. "It's not an accent, it's a speech impediment".

"Errr, sorry".
It gets worse. We were in the Bryn Tyrch the next night, and I asked one of the company, who was a speech therapist, what sort of thing might make someone sound like a Greek with a broken jaw.

Looked up, he was standing at the bar. Fuck.

God that Took me back OP, I did exactly the same as you did only this was in full view of a packed retail car park - queue me coming out of the store to notice the front side of my car practically hanging off - I started crying touching it in disbelief, people came up to me asking was I ok and eventually the retail security were called, after I told him it was perfect when id gone in to the store he radioed over to the head office to see if they had footage of anyone crashing into my car. They were talking about calling the police and I was hysterical - was only 21 and never experienced anything like this, thought it was gonna be left with a bill running into thousands....

It was at this point I looked up and realised it wasn't exactly where id left it when I parked, I glanced behind this a town over and saw my car sitting there perfectly fine. that was the most embarrassing day of my life having to explain id got it wrong.