WWYD - school ringing to fetch sick child

[confusedofengland]

So, DS3 is in Year 1, he is nearly 6. In his class of 30 DC, there were 9 children off yesterday with a sick bug. One actually vomited in class, 3 were sent home feeling sick, 5 were sick overnight & did not go in. Since DS has heard about this, he has been periodically saying he has a tummy ache, then eating & behaving as normal, very lively, eaten chocolate offered to him etc. Slept fine last night.

I was volunteering at the village library this morning, as I do each week. We are not allowed to open with less than 2 people. I also do paid work at this & other libraries all within a 15 minute drive from home. I had a call halfway through my shift, at 11am, to say DS was 'pale & complaining of a tummy ache' so could I fetch him immediately? I explained that I was working & would need to wait until 1pm as otherwise the library, which was hosting an event, would have to close. They said that was no good & I had to come immediately.

So, a customer who is also my friend, stepped in & I went to fetch DS. It took them 10 mins to fetch him from the classroom & when he came out he was eating an apple, jumping around & not pale! I took the apple from him & said that was not a good thing to eat if he had a tummy ache. He was asking for lunch & quite chatty, as normal. We came straight home (5 min walk) & I have put him to bed, saying that if he is ill he needs to get some sleep. I intend to leave him there a while then get him to do reading/writing this afternoon if he is still ok (as I suspect he will be).

Have I done the right thing or have I overreacted? I can't help but think that if I worked any distance away, as lots of parents here do, the school would not have called me & I do feel a little irritated to ge called out to a child who seems perfectly fine!

Savingshoes are you being facetious?

An apple a day...

So many schools have closed because of the sickness bug getting out of hand I can see why they are being on the cautious side, at the end of the day school isn't childcare and if you work somewhere they have to make allowances for parents. If there have been that many cases I would their policy temporarily may be send them home before being sick to prevent the spread, while annoying which would you prefer happen- them shut the school for a week to stop the spread or take your son home for half a day?

I'd have been cross, too, OP. And I work in a primary school.

You know your kid; one look told you he was fine. I'd have insisted on mine staying.

I have the opposite problem. The school never call despite DD having a long term issue that means she often feels unwell. I'd rather she was at home reading in bed or catching up on sleep than struggling to concentrate in school and coming home in tears because no one listened to her or took her seriously. She never pukes and its not contagious so they just ignore her because it's a regular thing. They only seem to care about their attendance figures.

I don’t think you are being unreasonable to be annoyed but I don’t see what else the school could have done. They have to try and contain the illness.

We have to give three emergency contacts for the school my children go to if people who can pick them up in an emergency

I’m a parent who has refused. My dd had spent quite a few weeks complaining of a sore tummy every now and then. We had experienced something similar a while back and her bowel was a little impacted. I had taken her to the GP to be checked earlier in the week and he seemed to think it was ‘behavioural my rather than medical. We had even kept her off a couple of days just in case but she was bouncing round at home eating normally. On this day She was slightly anxious as her teacher was off sick and so was her best friend and several class mates. She was perfectly fine when I took her in. They rang me and said the supply teacher wanted her to go home as she looked pale and complained of feeling sick. My response was ring me back if she is sick. They were a little taken aback but I explained that she was actually ok and has been complaining on and off for several weeks of a sore tummy and feeling sick. She may be anxious as it’s a supply teacher and she’s very clingy when it comes to me. I suggested that she went back to class and told her that they couldn’t get hold of me but if she was still complaining at lunch I’d come in. They never rang me and she came out at home time bright as a button.

So, I think parents know their children and should be able to make the decision. There are several kids in my daughters class who are off more than they are in school. Generally a common cold seems to be a reason to stay off but mine seem to have a constant cold so they’d never be in school if I kept them off for that. My dd1 gets regular UTIs but once’s she’s been seen by the GP for meds she’s back in school. I’m happy to keep them off for D&V or if they are too I’ll to get out of bed but if they’re running about the house fine they’re fine enough to go to school.

As a mum. I totally sympathise. Once I had a call to pick up ds1 as he felt sick the day after his baby brother was born. He obviously was just excited and wanted a day off. Another time, I had a call to pick up ds2 because the wally had downed 3 jugs of water in a dare and then brought it back up. I was told he’d need the 48 hours off too!

However, I work in a year 1 class that currently has the lurgy. Kids are dropping like flies. Many getting upset that they have tummy ache. I wouldn’t want them jumping around eating apples but unfortunately we are just doing what we think is best.

I see this is now on the Facebook page - but without the paragraph where I explained that he was fine when I picked him up. So people are calling me all sorts. I wouldn't mind so much if the whole post had been put on there, but I am actually finding it quite hurtful. Especially as I stated a few posts in that I was clearly in the wrong

note to self- dont put stuff on facebook or everyone will jump to a different conclusion

I don't blame the school playing on the safe side but you know your child and if he is pulling a fast one - keep him in bed and give him dry toast for tea!

Hes trying it on, mine has done the same this week because his brother was ill

The school shouldnt be giving a child who says hes ill something to eat if hes parent is on the way to pick them up

When I was a kid only a handful of parents had a landline at my school...we had a 'sickroom' , if you were actually ill you stayed there until hometime, if you were not you were in class...
When my DC were at their primary school we lived 8 miles from school and had no transport, didn't have a car, there were no buses either. School had to cope, They were transported by school bus and later taxi to/from school. (1990s)

So @MNHQ why did you edit out part of @confusedofengland 's post, to up the drama? Wouldn't it be a good idea to at least use a disclaimer to say you've edited the post for impact - instead of using a 'screenshot' that you've clearly edited?

that’s pretty shocking. Post the OP in its entirely or not at all @MNHQ. Shitty behaviour otherwise.

I have asked @MNHQ to remove the post from Facebook. They said last night that they would do so 'if this would help set your mind at ease'. However, 12 hours on, it is still there. I am finding it very upsetting reading some of the comments posted by people who don't have the full story

It's the second time this week @MNHQ have posted shitty things to Facebook. Completely out of order.

Let's be honest - they do it to be goady (which is against talk guidelines ) and to encourage more vipers to sign up to harass posters in AIBU.

@confusedofengland
the school had their hands tied regarding sending him home, and they have to limit potential exposure to sickness bugs as they have been AWFUL this year.

BUT i fully agree with sending your DS to bed when he got home and treating him like he was sick if he was sent home sick. Nothing winds me up more then children go home sick then have a holiday day, as imo it reinforces that pretending to be sick let's them stay home and do lots of fun things!

Seems to be gone now @confusedofengland
Did anyone give you an explanation as to why they edited it? I didn't agree with your viewpoint about the school sending him home, but @MNHQ deliberately editing your post to look goady was shitty behaviour.

This shows me how the world has changed, parents don't prioritise their ill children over work, anymore.
If you don't have cover for such times your working situation as parents isn't sustainable.
School isn't childcare and ill children need to be at home.
I can see why the school sent him home, he said he was ill.
I agree with others though, he needs to learn not to put illness on.
Bed with a book would be my solution, make him bored.

@Drabarni I did prioritise my child. I came out of work & had picked him up within 25 minutes of the school calling. Then when I established he was not unwell, I sent him to bed so that he could learn that this is not something to pretend about

@JemimaPuddleCat they gave no explanation at all! I have no problems with people disagreeing with my viewpoint if they have all the facts & they can't do that if those facts have been edited out! Thank you for your support in that.

Omg @ that Facebook post! I never even knew HQ put actual/threads and posts on there, let alone posts that they have edited.

Okay. That's appalling on MNHQ's part. I think they should apologise to you.

I for one won't be making any OPs on here in the future, if they're going to be misrepresented this way.

Jesus, that is shite, isn’t it? Any “Mumsnet have commented on this thread” explanations, MNHQ?

I know they're permitted to do this legally, but I'm really surprised @MNHQ would misrepresent your post to be provocative. Any response from them yet OP?