WWYD - school ringing to fetch sick child

[confusedofengland]

So, DS3 is in Year 1, he is nearly 6. In his class of 30 DC, there were 9 children off yesterday with a sick bug. One actually vomited in class, 3 were sent home feeling sick, 5 were sick overnight & did not go in. Since DS has heard about this, he has been periodically saying he has a tummy ache, then eating & behaving as normal, very lively, eaten chocolate offered to him etc. Slept fine last night.

I was volunteering at the village library this morning, as I do each week. We are not allowed to open with less than 2 people. I also do paid work at this & other libraries all within a 15 minute drive from home. I had a call halfway through my shift, at 11am, to say DS was 'pale & complaining of a tummy ache' so could I fetch him immediately? I explained that I was working & would need to wait until 1pm as otherwise the library, which was hosting an event, would have to close. They said that was no good & I had to come immediately.

So, a customer who is also my friend, stepped in & I went to fetch DS. It took them 10 mins to fetch him from the classroom & when he came out he was eating an apple, jumping around & not pale! I took the apple from him & said that was not a good thing to eat if he had a tummy ache. He was asking for lunch & quite chatty, as normal. We came straight home (5 min walk) & I have put him to bed, saying that if he is ill he needs to get some sleep. I intend to leave him there a while then get him to do reading/writing this afternoon if he is still ok (as I suspect he will be).

Have I done the right thing or have I overreacted? I can't help but think that if I worked any distance away, as lots of parents here do, the school would not have called me & I do feel a little irritated to ge called out to a child who seems perfectly fine!

Believe me, as a teacher it's hard to make the right call. It's not like you can ignore the other 30 kids in the class for an hour to monitor the one looking ill.

I've been hugely embarrassed on several occasions, when a kid who'd looked really poorly for the last hour, has jumped up and greeted their parent with a huge grin. They seem to specialise in making a sudden recovery about two minutes before their parent's car pulls up.

On the other end of this, I once sent my daughter to school a bit off colour, thinking she'd be okay, only to get a call at 9:10 saying she was really poorly, but had told them that "Mummy said I HAD to come to school"

It's not an exact science, for the teacher or the parent.

@FreakStar like I say, we are in a fairly small village, so everybody knows everybody else's business! Also, we have a class WhatsApp & parents have been posting about this on there, both as a warning to others & for moral support!

I wish DS’s school did this! He’s in yr4 and the kids need to be missing a limb or exhibiting signs of the plague before they’re sent home. Very irritating as DS has been genuinely unwell, in pain, with a fever (underlying ear infection) but they didn’t call me. By the time pick up came he was in bits and now worries about going in if he’s not 100%, as he knows he won’t be sent home...

Schools don't want to send children home; it affects their attendance records and they will be under pressure to keep these high.
parents also complain if schools have not sent their sick DC home.
They have to make a call. It's not a dr's surgery, it's a school,at risk of stating the obvious.
As parents we make the wrong call re illness as do schools. But no one wants a sick child at school spreading germs to the ones who are there.

I always made being off school ill (especially if I suspected they were trying to pull a fast one) as dull and boring as possible. If he was feeling sick then nothing to eat as his poorly tummy won't like it. All very quiet and dull. Reading books no TV until evening sort of dull. Certainly no jumping around unless they were genuinely getting better from an illness. I never wanted them thinking it was a good way of getting out of things at school.

I can't say I blame them for sending him home in the circumstances. As for trying it on, he's only 6. One day (maybe soon given the bug going round) he'll complain of stomach ache, you'll think he's trying it on and send him to school and he'll be sick - then you explain that you thought he might have been trying it on again.

I've been called to get a child when I've been 2 hours away and when I've been at a funeral. Both times I only found out when I was texted by DH and noticed a missed call. They don't know where you are.
But as DH usually works an hour away and I sometimes work 2 hours away they'd have to work something out (on the day of the funeral, DS who has SEN and behaviour issues was very upset and I ended up picking him up 10 minutes before school ended, as DH was an hour away, so frankly they should not have bothered, but that's what that school is like).

That's not to say I'm saying you should send him when you know he's sick, but you might not realise he is if he's still bouncing around when telling you he's not feeling well.

Too ill for school?, too ill for TV, fave toys etc etc

It's tricky for schools. He might be feeling genuinely unwell but still bounce about. He might also have been observent and found a good way to go home.

I did the same as you though. Straight up to bed to rest. No entertainment other than a book. Make home boring during school hours and then miss out on any after school thing to boot. It works pretty good in their choices if illness wasn't obvious.

It has nothing to do with if/where parents might be working. If they think your child is ill, they will quite rightly, call for a parent to pick them up ASAP. Especially if there’s a bug going about, it’s better to err on the side of caution.

Well the problem isn't with the school is it when they have lots of sick children & another says their stomach hurts?

Unfortunately he might not learn until he really is ill & isn't believed!

Parents have a responsibility to find someone to pick up any child the school has deemed sick. It is often inconvenient, but it’s just something you have to be prepared for.

With a stomach virus that bad going around, I don’t blame them for being overly cautious.

Too ill for school?, too ill for TV, fave toys etc etc

Yes. Because feeling ill means you don't get any compassion at all.

Too ill for school?, too ill for TV, fave toys etc etc

Gosh. When I’m ill I lie under a duvet watching TV. When my children are ill I often let them do the same.

Course you do. A nice book to tuck yourself up in bed with.

My 6 year old would claim to be ill just so that she could go to bed with a book! My 4 year old unfortunately doesn’t have the reading ability yet to be able to read one to herself in bed.

Of course you have to go and collect your son. Ffs.

I had a call halfway through my shift, at 11am, to say DS was 'pale & complaining of a tummy ache' so could I fetch him immediately? I explained that I was working & would need to wait until 1pm as otherwise the library, which was hosting an event, would have to close. They said that was no good & I had to come immediately.

You said they'd need to wait? You prioritised your job over your child, and were happy for him to potentially be spreading his germs around?

You really don't know if he's getting the bug - time will tell.

Reminds me of a rubella outbreak, back before MMR jabs, DS1 caught it and was off school, DS2 wanted it desperately and kept searching for spots. I took him to school, he was fine, as the day went on a rash developed and teacher said, are you OK, he told her he had rubella and mummy had made him go to school. I got called to fetch him, Head had a real go at me and no matter what I said she was convinced I had taken him to school knowing he had rubella. Madness as I was at home with his brother anyway.

At least you didn't get a telling off from the Head, 40 years later it still annoys me as it was so unjust.

You were quite cheeky to tell the school they’d need to keep your on the verge of puking child (you were unaware at that point that he was swinging the lead) for another 2+ hours because it was inconvenient for you to collect him at the moment, op 🤦‍♀️
Most schools require more than one emergency contact, doesn’t yours?

Next time, tell the school to ring 111 until you arrive at school after 1pm.
Stick to your plans, sounds like the school first rider just panicked.

My child was poorly for a few days when there was a sickness bug at school before Xmas. He was pale, lethargic and off his food for days. I am convinced he had the bug but wasn't sick.

Tell the school to call 111?! 🤣🤣🤣. I presume that was a joke?