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Original poster

Does everyone think their kids are beautiful?

223 replies

Hoolajerry · 16/01/2020 22:47

Looking at my dd tonight and wondering how I produced something so lovely. She's 12 with long nearly black hair, very pale skin with a few freckles and grey/blue eyes. She's slim and toned and just lovely really.
Whenever you read about dc on here they are always gorgeous according to parents. Do all parents think their kids are gorgeous?

OP posts:

userabcname · 18/01/2020 08:43

Of course I think my boys are beautiful but I am aware of a mother's bias and that other people doubtless do not find them the most gorgeous creatures on the planet.
Ah, this thread brings back memories of being a child - I remember being stopped on the street with my mum and told what a beautiful child I was. I felt very smug! I look back on photos now and realise people are just polite/kind/like kids....I was a very normal looking, chubby-cheeked thing!

aurynne · 18/01/2020 10:46

I am a midwife and I am actually chuckling reading this thread. Yes, most mums think their newborn is the cutest, most beautiful in the World. No, it's not true.There are only a tiny proportion of newborn babies who are actual stunners. Most of them look like a wrinkly beetroot.

Same with toddlers. All the "I look at photos of my baby and see he/she was not that beautiful, but now he/she is a stunner" don't realise that in 3 years time they will look at photos of their child and think exactly the same thing. Most toddlers are averagely cute, and as soon as they fill their nappy or pick their nose, the basic cuteness gets completely erased. Again, when I look at a whole class of toddlers there may be one who is beautiful out of them. Sometimes none.

But yes of course, on a MumsNet thread, almost every poster's baby/toddler/child/teenager is stunning :P

(they will also mentally agree with my post but still think it really is their child the one who is stunning out of the whole class)

It is hormones and genes.

AmbitiouslyFit · 18/01/2020 11:27

My first born is objectively very handsome/attractive. He wasn’t born gorgeous but became that way when he was around 6-8 months. Before that he was gorgeous to me only :D but very underweight and so looked alien.

My dd is attractive and Gorgeous and the love of my life but her beauty isn’t conventional like her brother and sadly people around me seem bizarrely obsessed with pointing out that her brother is the handsome one.. and to her grandma she isn’t good enough and she makes that very clear.

But its Their loss if they can’t see wat I see and to miss out on her beautiful smile and gorgeous gaze just because they’ve limited beauty to one definition.

So yeh both my kids are beautiful.

One is blond hair, thick lashes, big eyes and gorgeous hazel eyes.

The other is black hair, tanned skin, thick brows and lashes and gorgeous smile.

AmbitiouslyFit · 18/01/2020 11:32

aurynne before I was a mother it is true that I used to see all Newborn babies as wrinkly potatoes. Couldn’t see the fuss and now I’m obsessed with babies. and when they’re around 4 months or so I’m sorry but most babies I see are gorgeous. Maybe your definition of beauty isn’t the same as everyone else’s.

But toddlers I’ve always found cute. And as a nursery teacher once, I disagree with what you said. They really are adorable.

Their features are flawless and so symmetric and perfect. Defined and pure. I cannot not see beauty.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe · 18/01/2020 11:45

AmbitiouslyFit, I smiled at your post because I understand what you mean but you're doing the same thing, objectifying your perceptions of beauty. Your mum/MIL is doing the same but in a more negative way.

I don't post about my children, not about their looks or anything, because it's irrelevant. They're mine and I love them. That's it. How they look is immaterial and whilst it's impossible to resist smiling back at a joyful baby/toddler, their looks really don't come into it for me.

scrivette · 18/01/2020 12:36

The first thing I said when I saw DS was 'isn't he ugly!' He really was but he was my ugly baby and I loved him!

He is quite nice looking now though!

Deadringer · 18/01/2020 12:48

Don't we think our small children are beautiful because they are idealized versions of ourselves? They look like us but have softer skin, bigger eyes, smaller noses/chins, whiter teeth. Us but better?

doadeer · 18/01/2020 13:45

I think there are certain types of baby we find very cute. My DS is light skinned mixed race, he looks different to the other babies at groups so people always comment on how cute he is. Obviously I think he is beautiful and I am told it a lot but so are many babies!

When I look around at groups I think maybe 50% are cute then maybe 10% are very very cute. I suppose that tallies up with life where most people you meet are average.

Phew999 · 18/01/2020 13:56

I’m laughing that the advert that’s coming up whilst I read through this thread is for contact lenses. Clearly a lot of people who are in need of them 🤣

JustaScratch · 19/01/2020 21:55

I know I'm biased, I know all parents (well , most parents) think their child is the most beautiful child in the world, and I know, objectively, that perhaps my DD is not THE most gorgeous being ever created (although she's up there), but to me she is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen because I made her, I love her, she loves me, and every bit of her unique face perfectly encapsulates what she means to me. To me, she is a beautiful, cute, shining ray of gorgeousness who makes me want to explode with joy and pride. And that's all there is to it. M'kay?

AmbitiouslyFit · 19/01/2020 21:58

JustaScratch

I Looooooove the way you said it. Spot on!!!

Hadenoughofitall441 · 19/01/2020 22:38

Both of my kids are beautiful to me... they may not be as pretty or handsome as some kids but they have extraordinary personality’s that makes them who they are, granted my dd is a little madam and she drives me nuts most of the time but she is confident, strong and independent so I don’t care what other people think,

TheChosenTwo · 19/01/2020 23:30

2 of my 3 were what I would class as cute/pretty babies, the other looked like a jacket spud. Loved this one as much as the others as a baby.
And I still thought they were all lovely and cute in their own ways.
Now I would say 1 is beautiful and the other 2 are quite ordinary (actually one is quite strange looking - perhaps quirky, think this one will grow into their faces!) and look like me, poor sods.
But no, I’m not one to fall over myself telling other people how gorgeous my children look. I do however tell them they are beautiful people because to me, they are perfect.

Mother87 · 19/01/2020 23:39

Mine ARE gorgeousall grown up now and beautiful/handsome...

MAFIL · 20/01/2020 02:17

The first thing my DH said when he was handed our firstborn at birth was " Urgh, it's disgusting. Take it away." The MW thought he was joking, but he wasn't. He was slightly less repulsed once the blood and vernix was cleaned up, but I don't think he ever thought any of our children to be beautiful. He said number 2 looked like a weasel and number 3 was nicknamed chubba. He loves them all, but I don't think he thinks they are physically beautiful.
I have always thought they are all beautiful, in different ways, but I think it is a "whole package" thing, not just looks, if that makes sense? As babies I think the smell, and the feeling of their lovely soft skin adds to the beauty. Of course oxytocin has a lot to answer for - we are programmed to find our babies beautiful. As they grow up, personality comes into it too and we start to find who they are beautiful, not just what they look like. When I look back at baby photos now, I still think that Weasel was beautiful, but the other two were pretty average. As toddlers they were all cute but definitely not model material, and now they are teens/adults they wouldn't stand out in a crowd for either good or bad reasons. But to me, they are still the most gorgeous and precious human beings on the planet of course, because beauty actually isn't skin deep, it comes from within.

Patienceisvirtuous · 20/01/2020 02:59

My DS is a really bonny bairn and cute as a button. He gives me eye-lash envy! And he is so cheeky with the best giggle. He loves to sing (he is two and a half) and his animal animal figures (he has at least 100!) are his favourite things in the world!

He is my cherub and I adore him :)

Connie222 · 20/01/2020 04:10

My Ds has always been beautiful.

My dd was the ugliest thing I’d ever seen for the first three weeks of her life. Luckily she is nice looking now.

FrankSlater · 20/01/2020 04:15

Yes. She is a continuation of your genetic line. Healthy human beings are programmed to want to pass on their genes. As such they find their children beautiful & will sacrifice anything for their survival. To a lesser extent it is why we prefer our siblings. Lesser still our cousins. And lesser still our "race" or ethnic group.

QueenofLouisiana · 20/01/2020 07:47

One of the first things I was told as a teacher was to remember that every child is someone’s precious, beautiful gift. I understand that far more now, 22 years in the classroom and 15 years of parenting down the line, than I did at the time. Children deserve and need people who love them so much that they are always beautiful.

So, yes, DS is beautiful- teenage spots, dodgy hairstyle and all. He has gorgeous eyes, luscious lashes and at 6’2” with wide shoulders and a tiny waist he is certainly noticeable. I don’t really care what anyone else thinks, I tell him regularly that he looks great!

ChickLitLover · 20/01/2020 08:53

The first thing my DH said when he was handed our firstborn at birth was " Urgh, it's disgusting. Take it away." The MW thought he was joking, but he wasn't.

😳☹️

TooManyGlasses · 20/01/2020 09:13

My Nanna used to disapprove of baby contests: “Because there’s only one most beautiful baby in the world, and every mother’s got it.”

Which is a very good line! But she always used to continue this statement with the story of how she was eventually persuaded to put her son into one at a holiday camp by the other mothers. And then was very put out that he only got third place - after twins!! Surely they should have got joint first place, so he should rightfully have come second? Etc. etc.

He was very cute though, my dad!

JonnyPocketRocket · 20/01/2020 09:41

@Yahboosnubsme Don't worry about all those PPs thinking their blonde, blue-eyed child is the most beautiful. DS was only born 8 weeks ago so they haven't yet been updated that he's now taken that crown, with brown hair and brown eyes

Lweji · 20/01/2020 11:33

I must be in the minority, thinking that newborn DS looked like ET, then.

I do think he is good looking, better than any of his 5 cousins , but not a stunner as in "the most beautiful boy".
Being a teenager, he also looks kind of weird with his little incipient moustache and some spots, but I get to see his best smiles, and, then, of course, he gets the "most beautiful boy" crown.

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