If your DH/DP died how would that affect you financially?

[Fantasisa]

DH has been diagnosed with cancer and we don't yet know what the outcome will be after treatment.

We have life insurance but incredibly stupidly we didn't change the policy when we moved house so it won't cover the mortgage where we currently live, it will cover about half. I think I could manage to pay the rest of the mortgage if he dies but it will be tight for me and the DC. He does have a pension, but I'm not sure what the terms of that are yet.

What plans do you have in place for if your DH/DP dies? Or if you die? I am very interested to hear what people, possibly those more organised than us, have done. I will probably get a better cover for myself now so at least that is in place for the DC's future while I am healthy.

OP sorry about your DH diagnosis. Hopefully treatment goes well. Can I just recommend that.if you haven't already done so you put POA and AD.in place, both invaluable pieces of paperwork! Also thank you for.posting, you might just have helped someone think about their future.

I'd be fucked financially. DH was diagnosed with leukaemia a few months after we got married when he was 28. Neither of us had life insurance. He's doing well and not expected to die from it, but no insurance companies will touch him now, and he has no death in service or the like. We now have a mortgage and I have good life and critical illness cover so at least if I die him and the kids are fine!

Since he was diagnosed I try and encourage all my friends to take out life insurance asap, mortgage or no mortgage. If we had bought a house we would have definitely taken it out, just hadn't crossed our minds before then.

DH and I both have good pensions and have elected a monthly survivor's benefit that will cover our current monthly mortgage payment. Our own pension will be enough to pay the other bills and live comfortably.

Chances are that either one of us would sell the house if the other dies and buy something much smaller. The house is too big for one person and the property is rapidly becoming too much for DH to maintain. In fact, we're just waiting for the market to come back up so we can sell.

Sorry to hear about your DH.

Like some on this thread we have got life insurance policies. Got one that we took out to cover our mortgage, then we moved so we took out a second one each to cover the extra bit. We went for level cover that doesn't decrease over time, the policies expire in 2045. At the moment they would cover the mortgage 1.25 times. Outgoings wise it would be tight for me by myself. I don't know if I could stay in the current house.

Thank you for doing this thread. You are making me re evaluate what we have in place. My income protection is still based on my old salary which is half what it is now, so I should really change that.

@Grobagsforever I have never even heard of Widowed Parent's Allowance or the Bereavement Payment, both of those could potentially be very helpful.

Would his pension pay out a monthly allowance of sorts to me too? I think it would help me to know during this stage what the figures are so I'm mentally prepared. Bit awkward to mention it to DH now as I'm only saying positive, reassuring things at the moment.

An added complication is that he has an adult DS and we haven't done wills yet because we couldn't agree on the terms/who gets our DC in the event of both of our deaths! I guess we will need to have those conversations too.

I’d have to find about £4K a year bill money.
I probably wouldn’t be going on holiday money so it could come from our holiday fund
He also has a small nest egg and a very small private pension...
House is mortgage free..so I’d be fine

Now if my first husband had died......💪🏼

So sorry to hear what you are going through..devastating news and I hope he responds to treatment and pulls through

I'm sorry to hear about your DH.

In answer to your question I would be well off via DH's insurance. And he would (though not as much) by mine. DH had cancer some years ago and it really threw us. Thankfully he survived and had a life insurance policy in place anyway (not great but enough to pay off the mortgage with a bit left over). His work also have a very generous insurance policy, although he took that job after his cancer (all fully disclosed to the work insurers). Since the cancer he has increased his private life insurance too. Increased premiums but we never expected cancer in his 30s.

Prior to his cancer I did not have life insurance in place and have since sorted it out. Was quite a wake up call. Mortgage covered and a substantial sum afterwards.

These things come out of the blue. Nobody wants to think it would happen to them. If it hadn't happened to us I wouldn't be insured at all.

I'm in the 'been there, done that's camp too. Dh died just under 2 years ago. He was ill for 1 year before. I am lucky enough to have been left comfortable.

Although we had spoke about life insurance we hadn't 'got round to it' and after diagnosis it wasn't possible. Fortunately we had no mortgage (one reason we hadn't given the life cover more thought). Dh's work provided a generous amount in ill health retirement/death in service benefit, which gave a lump sum (which I have invested and gives a monthly payment) as well as a monthly pension for me, and a small amount for each of the kids. I feel very fortunate to have this and it is quite sufficient.

OP, I think you/your DH would be wise to find out what is offered through his employer, as well as approaching Macmillan for information. Thinking of you both xx

I'm so sorry you're in this situation @Fantasisa We have insurance to cover the full outstanding mortgage. You can't get a mortgage in Ireland without taking out insurance to cover it. You have to have it in place before you can draw down the mortgage.

I have a policy that pays Dh €200,000 if I die. He has death in service worth €250,000 if he dies. We have critical illness cover too.

Another one who can answer this from experience. DH had a congenital serious condition, so we knew we would not be able to insure him (and had to choose our mortgage carefully so it didn't have medical questions).

When DH died it was difficult financially, because a) money was already tight due to all the times in hospital (very expensive living out of relatives' accommodation...) and b) I wasn't working because I'd been looking after DH. We were both under 30 when he died. Fortunately there was a moderate death in service benefit from his employer (God bless the NHS and their no questions asked benefits and pension scheme). This was enough to pay about 20% of the mortgage off, to pay for funeral costs, and to give me a bit of a bridging fund while I looked for work. The mortgage company were great and readily agreed to a payment suspension for a number of months too - I think they denied this was possible by phone, but it was sorted straight away when I went in and spoke to someone in a branch. They were lovely. I got a job fairly soon, and have covered the mortgage and everything else on my own for the past fifteen plus years.

What I'm trying to say is that it is still doable and not a disaster if you're without substantial life insurance. I hope you get good advice on your financial situation in person, and also hope that you never need to feel the benefit of it. Very best wishes to you.

I have good death in service cover plus a pension so dh would be fine.he earns a lot more than me. Previously we have relied on his death in service benefit but realised his new employers plan doesn't have that (not impressed) so he has taken out decent life cover that would pay off the mortgage and give a significant lump sum.

@NannyPear Does your DH have leukaemia? How did you get a mortgage? When I Googled when DH was first diagnosed it looked like we might be able to get our house in order with regards to life insurance etc if he ever got an all clear in the future.

@TARSCOUT - I will certainly look into power of attorney, what is AD?

Anyone reading this who is in a similar position to me financially, or worse, get yourselves organised!

My husband will be very well off if I go first. He'll get my in death benefit from work of about 300k, my pension. Our mortgage will be fully paid with a specific insurance we have just for the mortgage and we have a 200k life insurance payout.

If he goes first I'll get the above, but I don't actually know if he has a death benefit from work.

And I'm very sorry about your DH.

Firstly sorry for you and your DH, such a terrible thing to be facing

I would get a payout to cover the mortgage on our house in its entirety and through his works pension I would get all of his individual contributions back plus 10 x his annual salary as a death in service benefit. In a very dark hunour way we often joke about it when he's up a ladder. It's good time for us to be thinking about this as we currently have our children in independent schools for another 5 years and are just buying a house. Conversely- if I went he would get something from my pension but a relatively modest insurance payout as I'm chronically ill it's more expensive for me to get a new policy with enhanced cover even though it doesn't affect my life expectancy.

My DH got diagnosed with cancer in July last year which took us completely by surprise as I am sure it would anyone! He has always been the one that's good with money and sorts out the mortgage etc. He however decided we didn't need life insurance. His view was that he has a flat that can be sold to pay off any remaining mortgage and has a good pension and lump sum. The diagnosis has panicked us now as whilst he isn't currently terminal we need to get things in order. So we are likely going to sell his flat and pay off the remaining mortgage. Then use the remaining to pay for the DC schools. In the event he dies I will then get lump sum and monthly pension so we are actually going to be fine. I also work full time and will get my own pension.

Our life insurance covers our mortgage and living expenses for 13 years. We got it when ds was 6 and made sure it would cover me being home with him until 18 as he has complex special needs. I would likely work in that time but we wanted a buffer.

Thank you, @FlatheadScrewdriver. I'm so very sorry you went through that. I am calm about it to be honest as I can't change it now.

I'm very lucky as I am in a good flexible job close to home and my DC are both primary age so no hefty childcare bills anymore, just holiday and afterschool club. I am better placed to cope financially with this than any other time in my life which is a massive relief.

I'm single and have 2 major medical conditions.. I'm not sure I could get medical insurance.. could anyone advise?

OP I'm really sorry about your DP

DH has no cover of any kind but any salary covers the mortgage and all the bills so we'd be okay.

DH on the other hand would be royally fucked if I die as I can't get life insurance. I'm currently trying to move back into permanent employment (rather than current self employment) partially for this reason.

Sorry about your DH's diagnosis

*any salary = my salary

Yes he has chronic myeloid leukemia, will likely have it all his life unless new advances in treatment are made but it's currently well controlled on medication thankfully.

Honestly there were no problems getting a mortgage. We bought a house 1 year after he was diagnosed and I can't even remember for sure if he was asked about it. We just remortgaged this year and the lender didn't ask about our health.

No insurance here. I get death in service benefit which would pay out a lump sum. Enough for him to continue paying mortgage and living expenses.

If he died then I would be selling the house and relocating

No mortgage. Life insurance for each of us, with plan to stop when youngest child 21.

If I die dh gets £85k death in service. I don’t think he has anything similar. With that death in service dh would have 250k and his life insurance is 250k.

Have recently written wills and done power of attorney.

The plan was that the money would mean surviving partner could drastically reduce hours or have a period without working in order to support the dcs and take pressure off.