If your DH/DP died how would that affect you financially?

[Fantasisa]

DH has been diagnosed with cancer and we don't yet know what the outcome will be after treatment.

We have life insurance but incredibly stupidly we didn't change the policy when we moved house so it won't cover the mortgage where we currently live, it will cover about half. I think I could manage to pay the rest of the mortgage if he dies but it will be tight for me and the DC. He does have a pension, but I'm not sure what the terms of that are yet.

What plans do you have in place for if your DH/DP dies? Or if you die? I am very interested to hear what people, possibly those more organised than us, have done. I will probably get a better cover for myself now so at least that is in place for the DC's future while I am healthy.

He’s got good life insurance, I’ve got a decent job and would also move my next husband in pretty quickly I’d imagine. [joke]

Thanks @SteeeeRuggling - what an absolute nightmare for you! Did you know he had cancelled the direct debits or why?

I'm very glad to hear you have met a new partner and are well organised for any future events.

I’m really sorry you’re in this situation OP. Nobody ever wants to use their life insurance.

In the event of my DH dying, the mortgage will be paid off, I’ll receive approx £150k as a lump sum and I will receive £35k per year until our youngest child turns 23.

P.s I quit work 2 years ago so couldn’t pay the mortgage on my own, let alone feed my kids.

@AuditAngel - does the terms of your cover stipulate that it won't pay out to a smoker? DH doesn't drink or smoke so that is something, his cancer is just one of those things.

@Ronnie27 Mumsnet would warn you off being an idiot for any cocklodgers!

It wouldn’t really affect me financially , mortgage is in my name and he doesn’t have any life insurance. I’d need to find an extra £500 a month to cover his half of the bills but could manage fine - still hope obviously it doesn’t happen

@aNonnyMouse1511 Where would the £35k a year come from? Is that part of an insurance policy?

The other thing this process has done has made us get our admin in order. I had no idea which company our life insurance was with as DH had set that up, similarly he had no information on my documentation. It must be a real headache dealing with this stuff after the death of someone so it does pay to be organised in advance.

Me and DP rent and due to long complicated story have no real savings. I would have to move l couldn't rent this place by myself. But l would be ok in smaller place. I'm older though and my kids from previous relationship now both living their own lives in their own places. When they were you get l had life insurance to pay for their future if l died. Now l just have enough to pay for my funeral. I do worry about it a bit as my partner is 14 years older than me.

Younger not you get

I'd be a very wealthy woman.

House is paid off, there is a business property, business, pension, savings and life insurance. We've always had good cover since our early 20s as DH was self employed for the majority of it.

We made a will and took out mortgage/life cover within a few weeks of our 1st DC being born.

OP - ask your specialist nurse about access to a Macmillan financial advisor. It should be offered routinely to patients and is worth making sure you’re getting everything you should at the moment during treatment.

Also check with your husband’s employer about death in service benefit. I get this and didn’t really know what it meant. We were talking about it the other day and I thought it was just if I died at work but it’s if you die whilst employed.

Sorry that’s so practical and not frilly but just in case it’s useful.

I’m so sorry this is happening to your family and really hope this is a hypothetical conversation. Not knowing is so hard.

@Spinmynipplenuts I'm sorry to hear about your DH. I'm glad you were financially covered, I hope that was some comfort to you.

Hi OP. I'm so sorry about your DH. Mine died in 2014, we had life insurance to cover mortgage and I received about 250k in death in service. I had one 4 year old and was pregnant at the time so a chunk of the cash went on nannies so I could still work.

If you have DC under 18 you'll be entitled to 3.5k upfront and 350 a month widowed parents allowance for 18 months. Used to to 600 a month til kids 18 but Tories slashed it.

Just seen he has a pension - they often have death in service benefits linked, worth checking

To be honest, if stbexh kicked the bucket now I would be made! He's insured to the hilt by both our joint policy and his work plus i would get a widows pension, alas the kids, well one of them would be sad, the dog more so than the kids, so would I - we still are good friends lIs now dreaming of spending the £1m plus he's insured for

Thanks @Fantasisa . It was more of a comfort to him to be honest. He had everything worked out before he died (he had been sick with cancer for almost two years). He used to say I’d be better off after he died. He joked about it a lot but I knew it gave him peace of mind.

It is tough for many women when the main earner is unwell. When we had children we planned for worst case scenario, to ensure financial survival if one or both of us died.
That included insurance sufficient to pay off the mortgage - I thought that was a prerequisite of most mortgage lenders? We also ensured that our pensions were signed over to the surviving partner so we got both the lump sum and pension.

I suspect your husband’s pension will have a death in service arrangement with a lump sum and usually half of the spouse’s pension. Hopefully it won’t ever be necessary but reassuring to know it will be OK.
We now have no mortgage, other property interests and both have good incomes. We’d definitely be worse off as singletons with one income but we’d be comfortable enough. I’d get his lump sum and half his pension, which is quite substantial. Likewise he’d get mine. He has good life insurance but mine is less because after cancer it was difficult to get a good deal so I just kept my original one when we upscaled the house. If need be, we could downsize but hopefully it won’t be necessary for twenty years.

I've been banging on about this for months to at least make a will and name a beneficiary on pensions. In the end, I pointed out that if he died, it would be on his parents to sort out his funeral as his NOK as we aren't married or civil partnered. A cheap funeral wouldn't bother him but leaving his elderly parents with sorting out his estate seemed to give him a jolt.

@ElphiasDoge I love a bit of practical advice, thank you. We haven't got a specialist nurse or had any contact with Macmillan yet but I'm sure I can find out. We haven't had any loss of earnings yet so hopefully we won't need to navigate the benefit system.

Initially I'd be up shit creek, we rent and I can't cover the rent on my own and I work from home so need the house to work.

Once his life insurance comes through I would have enough money to buy a house outright, not a big one but we have no DC so I won't need a big one. I don't drive so would probably sell the car as well.
As far as I am aware his life insurance via work is 5x his yearly salary, and he has a pension with them. Not 100% sure.

We have no mortgage and a life insurance police which only pays out about 60k. Which is about what he earns in a year. I work and earn an ok wage and outgoings aren’t too high but I’d have to tighten my belt big time.

So sorry you have this worry on top of coping with your DH’s illness.

To answer your question I am the main earner by a large margin (mire than double) and the mortgage is in only in my name. But DH pays half the mortgage and we share bills so have financial commitments that reflect joint income. Now we have a baby I couldn’t afford all of it on my own, but I have an investment property that I could sell which would pay off almost all the mortgage on the house we live in. Without the mortgage I’d be just about ok financially but not sure how I’d cope practically with baby, demanding job, commute, horse and a host of other animals and no local family support. I suppose I would because you have to.

I do have critical illness and life cover that covers the mortgage, so if I die DH will actually be better off. Pension wise, DH’s is practically non existent, mine is final salary and he’d get £200k cash on my death from work too. I’d get about £15k from his.

As we have a newborn and cash is tight there’s nothing realistically I could do to improve matters. A few luxuries could go like our cleaner, but it’d be a pretty hard and miserable existence

Meant to say I really hope your dh is ok. .

@Fantasia - there might be some things that aren’t income based and sometimes there are Macmillan grants for little extras so it often is worth just checking.

I'm sorry to hear about your DH, I got my dad's private pension when he died suddenly at 36 without life insurance or a will so there should be some sort of provision there but i hope you don't ever have to consider that.

I've had life insurance and critical illness insurance since I finished university.
Not got our will sorted yet but if something happens to me our life insurance means DH will have the mortgage and our debts cleared and a funeral easily covered and a couple of years of his salary so he could choose not to work if he needed to do so.We've each got death in services with our work as well but i think they would only cover the bills for a year or so and then we'd be left to sort the mortgage after that.

I'm the only person I know my age with life insurance come to think of it.