How do you feel your life is turning out ?

[Lardlizard]

Better or worse than you expected

Life is good at the moment. I never had wild expectations. Always hoped that I'd find a decent job, marry and have some kids (which I now do)
I was ambitious career wise and have done ok for myself in my line of work.
I went through a lot of crap in my late 20's/early 30's which was very unexpected and I was very unhappy for a long time.
But now...I have 2 healthy kids, a DH and a cozy 3 bed home so I am very content with my lot and feel very lucky actually

Much, much better than my childhood - although I guess I knew from a young age that I wanted more than I grew up experiencing. That gave drive and determination to achieve more.

Itiswhatitis -please change things , you are young , you can do this ! Do not wait any longer! Don't be like me

I had just hoped to be happy as I got older. I am fine financially but not all that happy. The OH died, but the ex lives, ironically. I gave up work for health reasons, so feeling a bit bored but know that I would not be able to work. Parts of my life are happy but not everything is perfect, I will have to carry on and see how thinks go from here

Pretty good I think. Happy relationship, bought a house and have a heathy daughter and no day to day money worries at present. Our parents haven’t had any major health concerns yet, but I feel we’ll be caring more in our 40’s. Although the we live quite far away from them all at present which is a worry.

We moved at the end of my maternity and I’m desperate to retrain before I get too old. I feel a little bit in limbo until dd starts and settles in school.

to those who have suffered losses or illness

It's been a lot harder over the years than I would have hoped. I do finally feel like I'm on the right path and 6 months from now things will be more settled.
Career doesn't feel important now (which is a surprise to me). Happiness and health far more important. Yes I've made bad choices at times but I haven't let them define me

I’m pretty happy, enjoy my work which is part time so have time to do other things. Good husband, 3 great dc, lovely large family home.
The only thing is when I think back, I thought my life would be more adventurous, exciting and that I’d make more of a difference to the world in some way.

@Namestranger have an amazing time!! x

Absolute shit show

Really very different to the life I’d imagined but it does depend what kind of head you’ve got on on a particular day.

On a bad day (like today) I’d say my dad and mum divorced acrimoniously and didn’t realise I had a 90% hearing loss until I was 4. My dad married the evil bitch that is his wife who made my life miserable. My mum married my alcoholic stepfather. My son died 9 years ago. My beloved brother died 5 years ago and I miss him every single day. I’m living in a part of the UK I don’t like doing a job which involves making rich people richer and I was diagnosed with a chronic lifelong health condition (a bit like epilepsy but not quite) 3 years ago and all I can see ahead of me is decay and disappointment.

On a better day I’d say I love my husband. I have two children who are amazing and awesome people. We own our house (well, the bank does but you know what I mean). I live somewhere safe and good for the children. I earn above the median wage and my mum (now divorced again) lives near me and we drink endless tea together.

So, it depends doesn’t it on how you’re feeling at each moment.

I never really thought that much ahead when I was younger. But I guess life is going well.
We have our health
Dcs are doing well
Own our house (could be in a better area but hey ho)
Both have good jobs
And work life balance

I have everything going for me. I'm young, considered beautiful and intelligent (first from Oxbridge). I have a well-paying job and plenty of disposable income. But depression is currently robbing me of everything. I genuinely don't think I will ever feel true happiness again.

Sorry for those of you who have lost loved ones

My life is currently worse than I expected. Middle aged, lonely and anxious just about sums it up.

@Mooserp Me too . And this thread has made me cry.

Crap. Graduated into a recession, never got the professional job I wanted because they were firing not hiring due to austerity and cuts. That resulted in poverty and not being able to travel like I wanted. House prices went up and combined with the lack of a good salary that meant I couldn’t buy a house either. Plus I wasn’t lucky enough to meet someone I loved who loved me back. My 20s were a misery of poverty, depression and loneliness. By 30 I was on minimum wage in a council house and truthfully if I’d been stuck there I’d have killed myself by now.

However, in my 30s I made a fantastic save by marrying someone who had a good job and inheriting an unexpected chunk of cash that bought us a house. Then I had my DS. I’m not where I wanted to be but things could have been so much worse if I hadn’t been rescued from my previous situation. Unfortunately I suffered birth injuries and have permanent pain, but I guess you can’t have everything.

Rubbish. Really rubbish. Am very much in a hole that I cant get out of. I'm not sure what expectations i had of life or myself but it definitely wasnt this. I dont even recognise myself, it's a very weird feeling.

Better so far and totally unexpected. Financially, I earn at least five times what I thought I might, as I migrated into a higher earning career I never planned to, which fortunately I really enjoy.

Personally, there have been big downsides- , I never ever expected to get divorced. And even worse, never expected my daughter's dad to get terribly sick.....

but having gone through these traumas, I came out the other end of the divorce, at least, way happier, with an unconventional but wonderful personal life, and enjoying deeper love and better and more sex than I could ever have imagined! 😁

Who knows what the next decades hold!

It looks OK from the outside. But it's not.

Oh @wildcherries can you tell us more? I'm sorry to hear that....

Better than expected. I am married to a man I adore, we're financially comfortable, we're expecting a baby, I have some self esteem and confidence. There have been lots of sadnesses along the way (deaths in the family, miscarriages, etc) and there are things I would change (I live very far away from family and friends so am lonely sometimes). Having said that, the underlying foundation of my life is stronger and happier than I could have ever hoped for.

BraveGoldie I'm doing OK under my circumstances. People don't know I struggle as I do. But I had to give up work due to lifelong disability, and although it was a while ago now, I'm sad about it. I wanted a career. It's a harsh reality that I won't have that. And I'm on my own. Disability can be incredibly isolating. But I carry on. Thank you for asking.

Shit. Im feeling pretty fucked.

This thread is really sad. Is there a way that we can support one another?

Despite the fact my Dad died a couple of weeks ago and I'm in the middle of a cancer scare (hope it's not), overall my life is pretty amazing. I'm about where I dreamed I would be.

I have a lovely home, 3 gorgeous kids, a flexible job, a great DH. It's more hours than I'd like but only by a bit. There are negatives of course, mainly that I've realised I can't have the career I want right now whilst being the mother I want to be. Who knows if I'll fulfill my "promise" whatever the fuck that means. Nothing stellar so far but a good solid performance across various domains of life. I hope to keep my hand in career wise and re boot my career in the future. Like I said, there is background stuff going on, but I get lots of time to hug my kids and this is just fabulous. We have enough money though not outrageously wealthy. Life is turning out ok, actually. Especially when judged by my happiness not external expectations.

Mixed. I've worked hard but had lots of fun and some incredible experiences and adventures in my 20s and 30s. The last couple of years however, have been tough with miscarriages and secondary infertility as well as a life altering injury for DH that has had a massive impact on our lives and relationship. It's made things very difficult and I'm struggling rather and finding it hard to imagine our future.