Break-A-Wish ... just for fun

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So, this is a little game to play, like Make-A-Wish, but you break someones' wish by grianting it, and then making it bad.

So for example
Poster 1: I wish I won the lottery!
Poster 2: Congratulations! You wont hte kacpot, but cna't find your ticket... I wish I was taller!
Poster Three: Poof, you're 10ft tall... etc

here's my wish :

I wish that Someone else would make dinner tonight!

Poof! You have a personal chef, it's Baldrick from Blackadder Goes Forth.
I wish I was two dress sizes thinner.

You're two dress sizes thinner, but have feet five sizes larger

I wish I was in the south of France.

You're in the south of France - in a leaky tent in the pouring rain, surrounded by cow pats.

I wish I was going away on holiday tomorrow.

You are in the South of France but the weather is just like here
I wish my dh liked the same takeaway as me

He likes the same takeaway as you, and always manages to eat most of it before you get any.

I wish it would stop raining so we could enjoy our mini break

Poof! It's stopped raining, now it's hailing golf ball sized pieces of ice and nobody can go outside.

I wish I could have takeaway tonight.

Poof! You have no choice but to order a takeaway because you have a complete power cut at home, and you have to eat it in the freezing cold by candlelight.

I wish a had a bottle of Champagne to quaff this evening.

Poof! You down the champagne single-handedly, getting so wasted you strip naked and run across the street to tell your toothless neighbour you think you're in love with him, throw up on your own stairs and wake up in the morning with the mother of all hangovers.

I wish someone else would do my laundry for me this afternoon.

Poof! A well-meaning but clueless friend does your laundry, and puts your expensive, dark red, hand wash-only cashmere sweater in with your almost-new ice-white 500 thread count bedsheets ...

I wish someone would deep clean my kitchen for me.

My 5 year old will do that for you. Sure he doesn't know how the vacuum cleaner works or really how to clean anything at all, but he's keen!
I wish my laptop had more memory.

Poof! Your laptop remembers that night you had the one night stand and sends the video evidence to all your contacts.

I wish my house was finished renovating.

Poof your house is renovated but it has no windows.

I wish I could have a holiday

Poof! You have a holiday from hell in Spain and share the bed with bedbugs and cockroaches. The beach has had a sewage disaster and your suitcases are still in Birmingham airport... somewhere. The food is awful and you are struck down with norovirus and are confined to your filthy cockroach infested room.

I wish I wasn't in pain.

Poof! You become completely numb, so though you're not in pain, you can no longer taste or smell anything.

I wish my husband would stop dozing and do something before the day is over.

Poof! Your husband has stopped dozing and is doing something. Your Dad.

I wish I had a cleaner sense of humour.

Poof! Your sense of humour is now squeaky clean, but everyone is bored when you tell jokes.

I wish I had a chauffeur.

You have a chauffeur but he always plays gangster rap at full volume and smokes weed out of the window.

I wish I had long thick wavy blonde hair.

Poof! Pity it grows from your armpits...

I wish I had new bedroom curtains.

poof you have long wavy blonde hair but you have a chronic outbreak of nits!
i wish i lived by the seaside

Poof! You live by the seaside, but it is permanently cold and windy and rainy so you can't go out and enjoy the sea.

I wish I was in bed right now

Poof! You're in bed with all the flower bulbs and worms.

I wish I could get up earlier.

@FurrySlipperBoots

Poof! You are in bed right now because you have the nasty cold that is going round. You want a nice hot drink but don’t have the energy to get to the kitchen.

I wish I hadn’t already eaten all the fruit in the house.

Poof, your house is filled floor to ceiling with fruit and you can't move.

I wish my house was tidy!

Poof! Your house is tidy but the roof has just blown off in monsoon season.

I wish I didn't have to wear post op stockings on my legs.