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Friend blocked me after a gift

973 replies

Redshoesandtheblues · 07/09/2019 08:51

I wouldn't normally post about personal stuff this minor, but I am genuinely confused.

I sent overseas pal an email gift card for something she had raved about. A consumable item. No time limit on card.

She didn't acknowledge it.
Busy, I thought. And just waited for her surprised reaction when she found it.

To be clear, I took cues from her recent photos,so it wasn't off the wall. And it was in relation to something she was about to do. Either this gift card or flowers, I thought.

I spent time zooming in on makers of item, finding them and then phoning overseas and emailing, to sort out a gift card.

She blocked me!
Unblocked me to ask for her most recent gift back and told me to eff off!

I'm pretty stunned. But also worried.

Im currently unblocked , but I'm not sure how to handle this.

OP posts:
UmmH · 07/09/2019 17:34

I think plunkplunkfizz may have hit the nail on the head. Although you don't keep score, maybe she does. Looking back on the history of your present exchanges, have yours always been more expensive than hers? If so, this may have been festering resentfully in her mind, and now this is the last straw. She might think you are doing it deliberately to belittle her, particularly as the gifts were of the same type. Obviously that's not at all what you were intending, and it doesn't excuse her reaction. There's no way back for the friendship now so try not to dwell on it, and continue to be the generous, thoughtful person you are. Real friends will appreciate it. Flowers

Iamdobby63 · 07/09/2019 17:56

So has she actually returned your gift or just asked for you to return hers?

In all honesty are you actually interested in maintaining a friendship with someone who cares so little that she will dump and block without even giving you any opportunity or respect to say what the problem is in the first place?

ElizaPancakes · 07/09/2019 18:01

Really really odd. And even if she thought it was too much and wanted to stop your interest in her (like at least poster has suggested) it's still really odd. Surely in that instance you just stop responding? Don't send gifts?

I have no idea what her problem is but I hope she opens up about it. I'd alter the message posted upthread and send to her husband if you're still blocked.

Aridane · 07/09/2019 18:02

Just bloody ask her what the problem is

RTFT - she has!

SillyBillyBandy · 07/09/2019 18:05

Have you met her in person? Maybe she's panicking she's hit to meet you if she's told lies about herself?

Quirrelsotherface · 07/09/2019 18:13

Do you ever see her? Either way she's no friend to you, she's a massive, attention-seeking drama llama. I'd refuse to send anything back on account of having no answers from her regarding her bizarre behaviour.

WizardOfAus · 07/09/2019 18:15

She sounds very immature.

TheVanguardSix · 07/09/2019 18:17

I think this is the answer, what sillybilly said: Maybe she's panicking about meeting you if she's told lies about herself.

bluebeck · 07/09/2019 18:20

I hope the husband can help you make sense of this - it does sound bizarre...

MummaGiles · 07/09/2019 18:27

Could her raving on social media about this local winery actually have been sarcastic and you misread the tone? Could you have actually have sent her a gift card for somewhere rubbish?

Dollymixture22 · 07/09/2019 18:42

Could her husband think it is a romantic friendship? Could she have developed romantic feelings and is now panicking?

Mylittleradio · 07/09/2019 18:46

I wouldn't ask the mutual friend either, she may stir things

milksoffagain · 07/09/2019 19:02

Has she been under a lot of stress lately? Because according to a mental health nurse I was speaking to yesterday, if she has underlying depression it can trigger a psychotic episode... So definitely speak to the husband. If she is ill then you're being a good friend and if she's just an arse you'll have an answer and she was never who you thought she was.

PrincessPeachy23 · 07/09/2019 19:06

Do you follow each other on social media? Could you maybe have liked/commented on etc something which may have offended her?

Mylittleradio · 07/09/2019 19:08

OP said she's not on FB I think

Sparklypurpleunicornsaremyfav · 07/09/2019 19:23

Sorry no advice to offer that hast already been suggested but really want to know what happens!!

dillusionaldog · 07/09/2019 19:41

this may be stupid but maybe its the gift card amount? if you purchased £50 for example maybe they only loaded £5. so she thinks youre taking the piss. Although thats extremely rude if shes kicked off over that and she should know you better. Is there any way to check if the card was used?

Honeyroar · 07/09/2019 19:43

It's a very strange present to ask to be returned. When did you get it? You could've drunk it by now! I just think asking for a present back is so rude.

I work for an airline. Do you want some empty miniature bottles to send her?😃

Isleepinahedgefund · 07/09/2019 19:51

This is quite fascinating.

In any situation though, the simplest answer is usually the correct one. I suspect the answer will be found in the falling out with the mutual friend, and that there is something amiss with your friend from the Internet forum. This is not a proportionate reaction to a friend giving you a gift card, no matter what the issue is. The blocking and unblocking business is adolescent behaviour, as is demanding the present back.

You may never know the answer though.

TessTackle · 07/09/2019 19:56

Just place marking

BobbyPuck · 07/09/2019 19:58

Planning to see each other next year.. If you've not met her and she's shared a lot of personal things then she may be thinking of an excuse to stay away from that situation.

CTRL · 07/09/2019 20:05

I would tell her how rude she is considering you went through so much effort to buy her a gift she would really enjoy.

Then tell her to f*ck herself and block her !

And if she really wants her gift back she must return the gift you sent her - since she wants to be petty.

The nerve of some people. Some bloody friend she is !

simplekindoflife · 07/09/2019 20:09

Are you sure the gift card had the right amount of money on?

It wasn't a low fat product or anything was it? (Suggesting she needs to lose weight?) or somewhere where her ex works??

Clutching at straws!

Clangus00 · 07/09/2019 20:25

Don’t send back the gift she sent you!
Once a gift is given it’s given.

Frouby · 07/09/2019 20:33

Da fook?

She sounds puddled. Bet the mutual friend tells you the same story. That's why she has never discussed, poor fucker no idea what she's done wrong either 😂😂😂