Effective put downs for cheeky children please

[IchiNiSan]

There are a group of boys who hang around near my home and shout cheeky comments to passersby. They're probably around 12-13, so puberty may be hitting and they want to show off. Ignoring them doesn't work, they just get brave and shout more and more comments. Any cutting put downs appreciated!

Ignore 'em. You won't win.

If you really want to connect with them, go and ask them for help before they have a chance to say anything - be very earnest and genuine - directions somewhere local for example. I always go to teens first for local info/directions. I don’t think it helps to create pariahs out of teenage boys. I’ve never not had a helpful response yet.

They are after a reaction, very hard but just ignore them! They will move on/grow up before you know it. Easier said than done, maybe call them something awful under your breath, might make you feel slightly better! Oh and don't take it personally either

Ask them if they are in senior school yet. It makes them apoplectic with outrage, apparently.

Some of these 'put downs' are turning me inside out.

OP, don't use them. Please.
You'll be ridiculed by the little shits even more.

Ignore them - you really don't need to retaliate. They're children.

I agree with the nicey nicey approach which is why I don't usually suffer too badly with cheeky shits. I laugh and tell them they're adorable, they usually then take the piss out of the one that shouted.

For fuck's sake don't make any references to a 12 year olds penis

Just ignore. You will gain nothing by making enemies.

Definitely ignore. You could wear headphones?

Ignore them. Really.

I'd find a way of making friends with them. Younger teenage lads are generally delightful once you get past the crap.

Most of the time I ignore, ignore, ignore.

They just want a reaction.

Say "Hello children"

@Silvercatowner I was just about to say this. I usually say hello and give them a dap. If I see them with their mums/dads, I'll cheekily mention "hope you're keeping out of trouble".

I had vaguely similar living across the road from me for a while and when they tried it on, I stopped, went back, gave them my best raised eyebrow and said, ‘WHAT was that?!’ and they shuffled off.

Ignore them. It’ll escalate for a bit then they’ll get bored.

Get noise cancelling headphones

Love the 'Who cut your hair? the council?'.
I'm definitely using that

You are an adult, they are kids! Do not behave the same as they are.

If it is a problem, then alert the police. They will then come round regularly and have a word if need be.

Some of these 'put downs'

Cringe.

Some teenage girls muttered some thi g rude to me the other day as I walked past so I stopped and looked at them and pleasantly said "sorry did you ssu something. I didn't quite catch it" but really nicely as if I'd genuinely thought I'd missed a non rude comment.
They aren't so brave when thyw have to repeat stuff in cold blood.

I prefer teen boys to girls. Most are pretty good once you get past the crap they talk. Some girls can be plain nasty.

Christ I can't believe people would actually retaliate like this towards a bunch of kids. How sad

They want a reaction. So just ignore. Dont be mean. 13 year old son here and they are still young and silly

So far I’ve learnt from the thread to:

Insult their mothers
Comment on their penis sizes
Make friends with them