Quick! Zombies are coming!

[AintNobodyHereButUsChickens]

Grab the nearest item to your left to fend them off! What item is going to save your life or not?

I've got a pint glass.

A lamp with a narrow neck and nice heavy base that would be quite an effective club. And a grumpy cat.

"Classic Works From Women Writers".

It's a fairly weighty volume with some nice sharp corners.

A really nice cup of tea

Oh dear, I’m toast - on my immediate left are sleeping DH and cat.

A tiny chihuahua

A Leonberger. She might be big, but is as soppy as anything - I’d rather it was the cat next to me as I’d have more of a chance!

A tv remote and a teddy...

Maybe I could sit them down to watch tv and snuggle the teddy instead of eating me.

My phone. Hmmm.
But unless the zombie was DS or the cat, I'd have time to grab at least a hammer.

On second thoughts, I might use the window to my left instead. To escape or to jump head first, depending on the number of zombies.

I've got a swordstick in the corner, if I can get to it. Otherwise a hefty book and a blood curdling scream.

My weighted blanket. If I could throw it over them they might fall asleep!

A needle. I've been sewing a button that fell off my shirt.

It's a start.

A silver art nouveau candle stick. It's got some serious heft to it so I might be ok! Especially if I can get to the other end of the mantle piece so I've got one in each hand

The tag end of a roll of kitchen roll. Slightly further left is a box containing a nearly empty bottle of full marks nit treatment.
Guess what I was doing yesterday!
Unless zombies are incredibly susceptible to cyclomethicone I'm probably dead.

theyeasayer me too, we’re doomed
Unless zombies are vulnerable to drool and hair

A fairly ferocious Yorkshire terrier. I reckon I’d be alright

The cat. Who is purring loudly at the momebt

Ever heard of a zombie being purred to death?

A block of A4 paper. How many paper cuts do you think it would need to bring a zombie down? I think I'm probably toast.

TheJellyBabyMadeMeDoIt

That's a good idea

Erm...I have empty space to my left! I'm dooooomed :(

A highchair. It keeps the baby under control but I'm not sure your average zombie would consent to being sat down with rice cakes and carrots.

Crap, I've got a Fibre One Milk Chocolate Popcorn Bar....

An iron fire poker. I should fare OK.

A packet of Maoam Stripes - my best hope is that zombies are sugar intolerant ...

I never get why being zombified is seen as a bad thing. I’m in the ‘just bite me now’ camp. No more worries about the mortgage or washing up. I can just aimlessly wander about, moaning. Sounds a pleasant enough life/death to me.

A black kitten. She has sharp little teeth and an obsession with biting. She runs across rooms to leap off of furniture and land on the back of our older cat. She has a growl that can rumble a room.

I like my odds.