Why would you choose to change your name to husband's if it was...

[SilverySurfer]

Cock. Sitting in the doctor's surgery earlier, Mrs (first name) Cock appeared on the board and I couldn't help wondering why you would willingly change your name to it or similar when you have the choice to keep your own name. Would you?

I'm one of the people who finds baffling the fact that women living in the 21st century still choose to go along with a purely patriarchal convention, and who would not have changed her own birth surname even if it were 'Crapsandwich' and I was marrying a Smith.
I'm lazy and find it much easier, living in Scotland, to say "Scottish surname with Mac and small d" than "Dutch surname, small first bit, space, spell the rest like this, no, not like that, try again, listen to my words, oh nevermind, that'll do".

I suspect for some women, it's very hard to say to their future husband and in laws, "look I don't want to change my name, because yours is cock, and well that's rather unfortunate. No one wants to be called cock, I love you though". Could cause real offence..

Alternately her maiden name may have been miss fanny, so six of one...

I saw a post once that photographed a grave stone with 'here lies Fanny Fiddler'.

She must have loved her husband very much to have taken his name, but it was 100 years ago and probably not rude back then.

Crikey, I thought someone I know was crazy to take her husbands surname of Onions, but it pales in comparison with some of these.

“I'd definitely keep my own name if it was the nicer of the two“

But that never happens. Men’s names are always nicer.

Taking the man’s surname is not patriarchal but patrilineal. There are numerous societies that were/are equitable but patrilineal.

Taking the man’s surname is not patriarchal but patrilineal. There are numerous societies that were/are equitable but patrilineal.

And our society is not like that, so the convention that an adult woman arbitrarily changes her name depending on who she's married to is definitely patriarchal as well as patrilineal.

Slightly off topic, but. My local vet used to be Peter Nutt, P Nutt is not to bad, but his wife was Hazel.

My friend married a Winterbottom and we call him 'Icy Arse' because we're children funny

I used to work with a C Dick

“Taking the man’s surname is not patriarchal but patrilineal”

It’s actually both.

@AngelasAshes but I would bet more are patrilineal because the society is patriarchal!

I don't understand taking your husbands name anyway. When we got married numerous people asked me if I was changing my surname, no one asked DP.

I had this conversation the other day. I work with people's records and the amount of women who pick horrendous names is shocking. Off the top of my head there's Smellie, Hawes, Cock, Burk, Pratt, Shufflebottom, Thwet (sweat with a lisp!), Boring, Groaner, Gubbins.

All hideous! Almost all inflicted on innocent children too.

I think I know Mrs Cock, her first names are Chlamydia Rose

I know someone with the name Hoare

I knew a lady her surname was La Hoare.

My mum knows someone who’s daughter got married and took her husband’s name- Clutterbuck! Pretty sure she’s a primary school teacher.

I know a family of Dicks, with several sons. All of their wives took that surname (over their own perfectly decent surnames) and inflicted it on their children too. I have never understood it.

Surprised that Miss Lodger did not double Barrel with Mr Cock

Friend married into the Surname Hiscock.
Lots of jokes about 'Anna loves Hiscock' at the wedding. (Not real name)
Anyway she didnt take the surname, and their DC have her surname. His family are not impressed and her DHs grandfather didnt speak to them for months over it.

I also think that, if you aren’t able to tell a man that his surname is an abomination and you’re definitely not taking it, you probably shouldn’t be marrying him. Far more difficult topics are going to come up in a relationship, and you need to be able to talk to someone. ‘No. I’m not being called Mrs Cock’ is a fairly straightforward conversation.

And any in-laws that claim not to understand are bring disingenuous. They know find well it’s a dreadful surname.

You end up with your fathers name or your husbands. My father is a raging abusive narcissist so...

I took my Ds to a hospital appointment last week, the (lovely) Dr introduced himself to me as Dr Paul, but his name badge told me his name was Dr Paul Dick...

I went to school with a Pratt and a Dick! To be honest, I feel Pratt is slightly better than Dick, mainly because Chris Pratt is around and it has become a bit more normalised now. I remember both girls hating their surnames though.

The your father’s or your husband’s name is not really a sensible comparison. You get a lot of things from your father (I’ve got my father’s hair, skin tone and ears as well as his surname) and you grow up with it as your name.

And I know lots of people who are growing up with (or who’ve grown up with) their mother’s surname these days.

My head teacher at secondary school as called Mrs Dick! To be a secondary school teacher and called Mrs Dick, she was fierce though. We also had a PE teacher called Miss Wiley.