If you're an atheist, would you have a relationship with someone with a faith?

[IWantToBeLizzieNotCharlotte]

I've just started using Bumble and there's an option to show if you're atheist/Christian/Jewish/agnostic.

A lot of men are atheist so I've assumed that it's a no-go. But it's really quite a lot of men. Am I being too picky? I wouldn't know if I met them in a bar if they were atheist

My dh is an atheist but over the years I have had a redevelopment/rehabilitation of my faith and now do attend church etc sometimes the children do too. We have talked about it a lot because I went through confirmation classes so it was important to me that the faith and the marriage could coexist. He occasionally will come to church and was happy to attend when our did chose to be baptized age 11 although he didn't take part in the ceremony bit.
You have to find a non dogmatic atheist and be happy with a relationship without proselytizing.

There's a difference between an atheist which I think of as someone who is firmly anti religion, and a non believer who is quite positive about some aspects of religion and happy if people want to do it,.....someone who has fond memories of singing hymns in assembly at school and likes the cultural Christian things we do in this country like religious based Christmas traditions or looking round old churches and so on. A lot of people in Britain are like this I think. Someone like that could definitely get along with a fairly liberal believer who is similarly tolerant of other people's beliefs.

^ that describes all my family, but we would all say we're atheists.

I wouldn't. Because it's not just a belief for me. I am so apposed to organised religion that we wouldn't be able to work a relationship.

I'm an atheist but not anti-religion as such. And I can see that some people can find comfort etc from it. I don't mind at all if other people believe. I just couldn't cope with a partner being a believer.

I really admire people who have faith. Not shouting about it, not pushing it on others, just quietly believing. I find it a beautiful quality and wish I could have some of that magic.

I might not share their views on women's role, sex before marriage, homosexuality, the afterlife etc. But I do try and share their belief in the intrinsic goodness of our species even in the face of war, disease, environmental disaster. And I try to live my best life and be my best self.

So religion wouldn't be an issue for me unless the other person made it one by trying to convert me

Though I'm an atheist I'd like to think I would be live and let live about being in a relationship with someone with religious views as long as they were the same with me.

Where I struggle with religion however is that so much of it seems to be about saying "I'm better than them because I believe in X religion and they should be punished because they don't" or it is used as a way to oppress and control women.

So on balance, probably not.

Where I struggle with religion however is that so much of it seems to be about saying "I'm better than them because I believe in X religion and they should be punished because they don't

So far on this thread, posters are expressing views that atheists are better than believers because they deem believers to be lacking in intelligence.

Have you actually come to that opinion because you’ve researched and learnt much as you can about faith. Or, did you acquire this opinion ignorantly?

it is very sad to read so many views sneering at those of us with a faith & dismissing us as dim, intellectually stunted etc etc.

It does get a bit wearing, doesn't it Ragwort - in the main I don't mind too much, because I do get the reasoning, but it can feel a little personal at times when people assume I must be thick, deluded or have a significant mental illness, and also assume that I never apply any critical thinking to my faith. Sigh...
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But I do understand those on the thread saying they'd not be in a relationship with someone with opposing views. That just makes sense for harmony in the relationship. I'd not want to be in a relationship with an atheist because of this: not because I think I'm in any way better but simply because I'd want to share worldviews and 'get' one another. However I have loads of friends in mixed faith marriages who get along just fine, but there are definitely compromises to be made.

Do (some of) the atheists on this thread not know what religion is? Faith in a religion is not something to be analysed using critical thinking skills. I think most believers are aware that their beliefs aren't rational but they have faith.

I say this as a person with no religious beliefs. I just don't have any religious feelings, but I don't attribute this to my superior critical thinking skills!

• Faith in a religion is not something to be analysed using critical thinking skills. I think most believers are aware that their beliefs aren't rational but they have faith.

Yup. I used to be a Christian...
However, my perception is that quite a lot of believers, especially the ones brought up in a religion, for whom it is the norm, don't realise their beliefs aren't rational.

Apparently some people are just more prone to believing things. It's about the make up of the brain. Having a head injury can make you religious.

It would be fine for dating and what not, but not long term, generally speaking you can’t predict that from the offset.

I’d never want a child of mine raised with a religion.

Faith in a religion is not something to be analysed using critical thinking skills.

This might be true among some faith communities and branches of religion, but certainly not among the people of faith I know. We have no compunction whatsoever in applying critical thinking to our faith, and actively welcome opportunities to do so. I prefer to use my reason than to believe blindly. The more I dig into the reasons for my faith, the more I am convinced.

That doesn't mean I have a nice neat pile of answers, but it does mean I engage and grapple with the issues raised and with difficulties posed by this set of beliefs, and so have little time for being told I'm stumbling around 'just having faith' despite faith not making any sense. It makes so much sense to me of the world, of humanity, of beauty and morality and reason and love.

Notice how everyone is studiously avoiding the comment about Michele Obama .
Surely people can agree that there is a difference between fanatics who are recruiting suicide bombers and local folk who are running the Food Bank, soup kitchen and old people’s lunch club?
And the comment that the Church can’t be involved in Social Justice issues due to the wording of an old fashioned hymn is just incredibly arrow minded.

No. I have very little respect for people who believe in God. I regard them as being intellectually lazy at best, gullible and a bit thick at worst.

This ^

Actually I wonder if the Obamas are proper believers or have to pay lip service to religion because of their social status. They could hardly come out as atheists in their position. I don't imagine Trump is the fervent Christian he purports to be either.

I didn’t notice the remark about Michelle Obama. But then I don’t think people of faith are necessarily less intelligent than people without. I think the issue is the acceptance that they are believing something with no logical basis. The people who tell me that if only I read this book, or watched this video I would realise the logic and intellectual rigour of belief, and the scientific fact behind Young Earth Creationism. Those- yep, I don’t think they are very intelligent. But the “nevertheless, I believe” types? Nope, no problem with them.

Oh, and the majority of the volunteers at our food bank are atheists. Just sayin’.

I would not marry someone who is not at least agnostic. Atheist is preferred.

One of my work friends married an atheist who later had the calling and is now a vicar. She is the most unlikely vicar’s wife you would ever meet, does not believe or entertain it and is quite impatient with some aspects of their life now, there was a house move (I believe they had to move to live within his parish or something like that) which she struggled with etc but she loves him and they have very lovely children together so that is that.

I think that lots of CofE people don't actually believe in it. They see it as a social club. I don't count them as actual Christians.

Yes - ambitious politicians in the US are bound to say they're Christians. Means nothing.

It would be interesting to know what would happen to a prospective prime minister who was an unequivocal atheist.

It would be interesting to know what would happen to a prospective prime minister who was an unequivocal atheist.

There's no way Johnson will get away with pretending to be a Christian so we may soon find out.

I doubt it would matter much in the UK, but they'd more likely say they were agnostic. If Trump can pretend he's Christian, then why not BJ?