Hilarious old sayings you never hear anymore.

[FurCoatNoSnickers]

I’ve started this thread having had the most hilarious exchange with an old man and his carer whilst getting my morning coffee.

“Give it some welly”
“ looks like 6 pounds of shit in a 5 pound bag” 😂
“If there’s a rotten potato in the pot I’ll get it”
“Knock ‘em bandy”

I’ve never heard any of them and they need reviving 🤣🤣

Please share yours that might be new to me also. I haven’t stopped laughing thinking I’d him.

'Suffering catfish!' - as close to swearing as my mother gets..

What did your last servant die of?

Put the Wood in the hole.

Were you born in a barn?

She thinks she's the only pebble on the beach.

In and out like a fiddler's elbow.

He/She can whistle for it..

Freeze the balls on a brass monkey.

As the Actress said to the Bishop.

She thinks she's the cat's whiskers.

As snug as a bug in a rug.

All got up like the dog's dinner.

An arse/face like the back of a bus.

When my ship comes in.

As quick as a rat up a drain pipe
I don't give a rat's arse
As thick as a whale omelette
As rough as a badgers arse

As ugly as a bull dog chewing a wasp

Knee high to a grasshopper. Small child.
If the wind changes you'll stay like that. If you were pulling faces.
She's got a face like a smacked arse. Not attractive.
I bet it's like swinging a sausage round the Albert hall. Someone who's slept around.
Not enough room to swing a cat. Tiny room.
She's all lipstick and hairspray. Someone done up to the nines.

Just thought of another one.
Have you got a match? Yeh your face my arse... haha love that one!!

I said when the balloon goes up today and no one knew what I meant.

something unlikely to happen - 'That'll happen when Nelson gets his eye back!'

Running round like a skopadiddle.

“Feeling as rough as a bear’s arse” means feeling tired, hungover or just a bit unwell.

Having “The creeping death” is waking up feeling ok but slowly the hangover kicks in as the day progresses.

Being “as daft as a brush” means you are a bit gullible.

More faces than the town hall clock

Pissing on your chips

Buzzing about like a blue-Arsed fly 😂😂

poster Marmite0nToast Thu 13-Jun-19 10:00:55
I thinking of other sayings now, like 'hanky panky' and abit of 'how's your father', both euphemisms for sex I think.
Along with - would you like to see my stamp collection 😂

..."what's that gotta do with the price of bread?"

Bobs your uncle and Fanny’s your aunt

Don't stand around like cheese at 4pence

‘How long’s a piece of string’ when someone asks how long something is going to be

nowt between t'lug oils

"If you were a dog, I'd have you put down. "
"It's as black as the hobs of hell."

Put wood in t'hole! (Northern for close the door)

I love this thread.
Lots of them remind me of my childhood.

I don't think anyone has said -
Leos for meddlers.
Reply to 'what is it ?'
the the grown-ups don't want to tell you.

I'm going to see a man about a dog. (My dad)

If something we as kids weren't expecting happened or were disappointed about, and we'd start saying "I thought..." the adults would say,
"Thought thought he'd shat hisself and when he looked he had"
and while on the subject:
Sticks like shit to a blanket
slide like shit off a shovel.

In a pig's eye
Bob's your uncle, Fanny's your aunt.
He's still wet behind the ears
A little bird told me
A sight for sore eyes (my mum when a visitor called who hadn't been for a while)
Flogging a dead horse (used to upset me as a child!)
Hanky Panky
Here's a how d'you do.
fighting tooth and nail
you look like you've been dragged through a hedge backwards
He's got an axe to grind
A chip on his shoulder
If we'd had a chip on our shoulder, we'd have eaten it. (My dad).
Thinks he's the under-dog. or Likes to be top-dog.
He's as bald as a coot.
Don't beat about the bush.
That'll be a feather in his cap.
Full of piss and vinegar
half cocked - for something that didn't work like a bad idea
Has the cat got your tongue?
Until the cows come home
Don't blow your own trumpet
Eat your crusts or your hair won't curl
I'll have your guts for garters.
point Percy at the porcelain
You can't teach an old dog new tricks

About a large lady in a low cut dress -
"A sixpenny icecream in a threepenny cone...."

"He's got a face like a horse in a huff" is one of my local favourites for when someone is being stroppy!

I could eat a scabby donkey

Not an actual saying but still makes me laugh, my dad to me "want any bacon with that brown sauce barm?" (Look, I like brown sauce!)

Ours was enough blue in the sky to make a sailors collar