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Original poster

Hand hold: DH missing after "accident"

976 replies

Stickywhitelovepiss · 07/06/2019 19:20

I know it's not been long, but this is really out of character and not sure what to do next.

Rang my DH on his mobile to let him know what time I'd get in and he didn't answer - often happens so then call him on work line. His work said he'd called in on way back in after lunch saying he'd been in a car accident but was fine, and neither hide nor hair heard since. That's all I know - no indication of the severity of the accident or where he or my car (which he drives) have got to.

I've been trying him on his mobile countless times, called 101 to see if they've got him somewhere, also A&E - but no joy.

He's been off grid for about 5 hours now, when he'd normally have picked me up, got the Tesco and we'd be sitting starting our weekend. But not even a text to let me know he's not dead in a ditch, and I don't have that phone tracker either on this latest handset.

Starting to panic slightly - if anyone is around for a hand hold or some pointers as to how I can track him down that's would be much appreciated....

OP posts:
CherieBabySpliffUp · 08/06/2019 11:22

I don't know Bastard
I guess it's a good thing for victims of domestic violence if their abuser is checking their phone?

AuntieMaggie · 08/06/2019 11:24

Could it be that they're testing blood for levels of ADs as you can be prosecuted if the police believe they've affected your driving can't you?

Passmethecrisps · 08/06/2019 11:27

So he has pictures on his phone of the accident which are clearly of his car and another car taken at the time he says it happened? Why did he not show you last night when you were talking about it?

Pictures
Called 999
You have spoken to a copper

It sounds like it probably did all happen mostly the way it was reported to OP. There is a detail missing about why he was considered under the influence though. Maybe other driver didn’t reverse into him but rather was shunted? Maybe the driver was already reversing and husband drove into the manoeuvre if that makes sense. Something a bit erratic or without care which might have caused other driver to be really angry and the coppers to wonder.

For the record I once skidded in my car and ended up in a ditch. It was incredibly snowy and the coppers has to close the road to assist the truck pulling me out of the ditch. No other car involved and cause was massive patch of iced over snow on the road. Passers by called the coppers and I was breathalysed. I was told it was automatic when they attended any road incident

offtowindycastle · 08/06/2019 11:28

Re: PP who says 999 calls don't record in call history- I have an iPhone and mine do.

hellenbackagen · 08/06/2019 11:35

If he failed to blow into the intoxilyser there is a reason - its easy to blow so sounds like he deliberately messed it up and thought that would be end of it

It isn't as he found out.

If someone cites a reason for not blowing then it goes to bloods

What I don't get is if he knew he'd be under why not just blow and prove it??

The machine will not have been at fault here trust me in that .

LIZS · 08/06/2019 11:35

If "other driver" made the initial call it is quite possible the one near 3 pm was a follow up. Recent road accident here took almost an hour to get a physical response and several calls.

fedup21 · 08/06/2019 11:36

OH did call the police, and both of them have been taken in to have a blood test (not breathalyser as not available - ?!?!!)

The breathalyser showed three times as incomplete, hence the blood test (not a urine one he says).

?

minmooch · 08/06/2019 11:39

@Passmethecrisps I had an accident where I slid on ice, clipped a car in front and turned my car on to its side when it slid in to a frozen bank. Fire crew, police and ambulance called - although no injuries. I was not breathalysed. I do not remember being breathalysed and I'm sure I would remember that as it's the only accident I've had. It was 8 am in the morning on a small road.

Original poster
Stickywhitelovepiss · 08/06/2019 11:39

It showed three times as incomplete - not that he refused to take it.

And the call definitely showed in his logs.

I said last night I was not going to discuss it and to wait till morning - hence only later seeing the photos.

It is possible he had a lunchtime drink but it would be so unlikely - neither of us like drinking in the day as it makes us groggy. Especially to the point where he would be over the limit, and think calling the police would be a good idea.

OP posts:
Original poster
Stickywhitelovepiss · 08/06/2019 11:40

He takes lunch usually at 1.30 or 2pm, so timings not unusual.

OP posts:
QuimReaper · 08/06/2019 11:41

I think the only thing OP's husband is covering up here is the reason he was suspected of drink driving. My bet is that he lost his rag at the other driver when he became violent, and tried to minimise his part in it (OP does intimate that that would be in character); or, based on OP's early posts about her not liking his driving, the accident was his fault due to reckless driving. The fact that he was the one to call the police suggests he wasn't entirely to blame.

999 calls don't show on some android models' call logs I think, but they do on iPhones.

Also if I read correctly, it was the police themselves who admitted they'd been given OP's number and just didn't call it. Seems very lax to me, but hey ho - probably fell through the cracks of a shift change or something. (Can someone remind me why he didn't have his phone though? Did they confiscate it? Is that routine?)

DontTouchMyCurls · 08/06/2019 11:44

When I last reversed into a car —in an otherwise empty car park— there wasn’t a dent but there were scratches on the bumper and paint marks, blood splatters, pieces of hair, a child’s headless teddy bear

How on earth did you get hair and blood splatters from bumping a car in an empty cat park??

OP, I don't think there's much you can do now apart from wait for blood results/court case and inform insurance company, especially if other driver was aggressive. I don't think your OH is going to give you much more detail just yet

hellenbackagen · 08/06/2019 11:44

If it showed incomplete he messed up blowing is what I'm saying

How hard is it to blow into a tube???

He messed up for a reason . I see it a lot.

QuimReaper · 08/06/2019 11:44

DontTouch I think that's a thing they call a joke...

JustHereforHarriet · 08/06/2019 11:45

Grumble Well there you go! Every day’s a school day Grin

QuimReaper · 08/06/2019 11:45

Also how did the car end up back home? Did a police officer drive it back separately?

Passmethecrisps · 08/06/2019 11:46

Very strange minmooch

There was never any suggestion that I was under the influence and the police officer said it was routine when they had been called to attend. Also a quiet country road and the only car involved was me. I am in Scotland - I wonder if that could be different. This was maybe 10 years ago. Maybe 12 actually.

Just story telling now but my dad was involved in an accident driving his tractor. Other driver’s fault completely but the other driver went mad. Police were called and my dad was breathalysed. My dad says they asked him if he would rather give a blood sample as he is badly asthmatic. He just gave the breath sample though.

I know there are lots of police officers commenting on this thread but is it possible that there is variation in response in these things sometimes?

AnnaComnena · 08/06/2019 11:54

Also how did the car end up back home?

Because that's where the accident happened? He was on his way to or from home at the time.

QuimReaper · 08/06/2019 12:00

Good point Anna Smile

Jonette · 08/06/2019 12:00

Did he have a solicitor with him during the interview?

GrumbleBumble · 08/06/2019 12:04

QuimReaper the car is probably where or close to where the accident was. If he nips home every day work to home obviously isn't far. It may have been shifted round the corner from the accident site if that was the nearest place to stop safely/park. I was in a minor three car bumb literally at snails pace in lane two of a duel carriage way last year I pulled into lane one to exchange details (ahead of the broken down car that was causing a tailback that lead to the bump). The other two vehicles stayed in lane 2 and got a proper bollocking for a passing police officer as all of the traffic now had to squeeze between the break down in lane 1 and the shunt in lane 2. They were reminded in no uncertain terms that while leaving the scene of an accident is a crime proceeding to a safe place to stop isn't. Not a mark on my very cheap very light weight car. The middle vehicle had a cracked light. None of us were breathalysed but my understanding is if anyone is tested all drivers are then tested otherwise they could argue in court that the other party could be over the limit.

bringbacksideburns · 08/06/2019 12:05

Whatever the truth is why did he let you wait hours going out of your mind and not inform you what was going on , but had time to inform work he had had an accident? Why didn't he leave a message for you?

I'm not getting that he waited around hours and hours in the Police station without informing you somehow where he was. Is that normal procedure in these circumstances then?

trotesio · 08/06/2019 12:11

@CherieBabySpliffUp

Yes they do, you're talking rubbish Confused

I had to contact the police last week

Hand hold: DH missing after "accident"
QuimReaper · 08/06/2019 12:12

bringback he does seem to have been without his phone for some reason once at the station, either switched off or dead. If it was explained on the thread, I missed it.

However, I would imagine he phoned work as soon as the accident happened as he'd have been due back imminently, and didn't phone the OP right away as that wasn't urgent.

Shequakes · 08/06/2019 12:12

He has lied.

Then admitted some parts after you went accept it. Chances are that there is more.

My dad served over 30 years in the forcem he is here and said 3 failed tests, isnt 3 failed tests. It's someone trying to beat the test.

Besides which, his original story was that there were not any test available? Why lie about that?