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Police showed up at my door last night

129 replies

AbsolutelyPetrified · 07/06/2019 09:18

Namechanged for this obviously.

About a week ago I went out shopping and found a purse in a restaurant. I used to work in said restaurant and know that the manager (at least back then) used to basically claim lost property for himself, ie. if wallets were handed in he would just keep the cash and chuck the cards, jewelry he tended to keep unless clearly useless etc. so, obviously I was a little reluctant about giving it in there. That part might have been a bit silly as its unlikely that the same manager still worked there or anything or that he hadn't eventually got caught, but anyway, I didn't feel comfortable handing it in there.

I decided to give it in at the nearest main information desk of the shopping centre (very large place with a fair few info desks). I figured that the person probably didn't know quite where they had left it anyway so they would likely try one of the main desks anyway if looking for it. Also fairly relevant here, I have a health condition which makes it extremely hard to walk long distances, especially if I need to do so quickly. It can literally take me hours to walk from my house to the local shop when its flared up properly. And this was quite a bad day too. So, on the way there I nipped into the toilet, where I saw someone I vaguely recognised and was talking to them about what happened, she laughed at me for being 'stupid' enough to be taking long journeys rather than just hand it in at the restaurant as apparently my reasons were silly , something I do agree with now, especially given whats gone on. I had to sit for a while in the loo too as I was in a lot of pain. She asked me where I was going, where I was meant to be going and that and then offered to take it to hand in as she was going that way anyway and she could see I was uncomfortable and basically, it made sense. Would have taken me a fair while to get there, and if she was going that way anyway, why on earth not just..make things a bit more convenient. At this stage I was in so much pain I was feeling quite bitter about finding the thing in the first place as it was a bit of a pain that I was now responsible for getting it sorted when all I wanted to do was find somewhere to sit, then probably go home. I gave it to her and she said she would hand it in on her way round and I thought nothing more of it.

Last night when I was sorting the kids tea, the police showed up at my door. Asking if I was at X on a certain date etc. I said yes, and they asked if I found a ourse which again I said yes. They asked if I still had it, at which stage alarm bells started going off. I said no, and told them the story. They then told me it had been reunited with its owner (so why ask if I still have it if they know I don't?!) and I started breathing again. But they said, the owner claimed a lot of money had been taken from it. I swear to god I did not open the thing and certainly did not take anything from it and basically, why on earth would I go to the trouble I had, if I was planning on taking anything? Long story short, they took a very short written statement from me (saying yes I picked it up, but passed it onto someone else because convenience) and left, but I was left with the feeling they suspected me. I have never before had any issues with the police, but am generally quite good at reading people and they really seemed to be off with me.

I gave them a description of the woman who said she would hand it in, and they said they would check more cctv. I am not concerned about that as it will show her, and will presumably show her leaving the loos and going to the help desk to hand it in, given the police told me that it had been handed in and was with its owner now. However, this claim about money being taken is scaring me a bit and I have been panicking like hell since they left. I cannot make any sense of it to be honest as surely, if this woman did take the cash from it she would have just discarded the purse entirely? What would be te point in taking it and then handing the rest of it in? Trying to think 'like a criminal', surely thats just drawing attention to yourself as you would know you were on camera and would be likely to be found out where if you just discarded it, noone would know any different especially if it was not you who actually found it? Anyway, panicked a lot about it, DH came in from work and I told him and he said straight away that the person is probably just trying it on for compensation or something. Which I had not considered at all.

Basically my question is, whats likely to happen wth this?! They did not tell me how much money was said to be missing, they did not tell me much at all really besides the fact that it was handed in, she had it but is now saying stuffs missing. I have been awake since 5am worrying about this, picturing them turning back up today to arrest me! DH says thats a but over the top but as I said, I have had no dealings with the police before (oddly, except one time when I did have money stolen from my bank, a lot of it and they just said they didn't have the resources to look into it properly) and am prbably overreacting but I am terrified. Utterly terrified.

From looking around the internet, it seems I would be held responsible as, being the person who found it I should personally have 'taken steps to get it back to owner' so I assume from that, that I passed it to someone else thats me in the wrong. I just feel so fucking stupid in all honesty and wish I had just left it where it was instead of trying to help. I mean, I know I cannot walk far and in the back of my mind I must have known it would be a right pain in the arse to actually physically get it to where I planned on taking it. I really wish I had just ignored it, and then whoever else found it could have done whatever they wanted with the damn thing. Seems a bit of..no good deed goes unpunished. Even though I know I did really stupid things too during the whole thing. Mainly, not trusting the staff in the restaurant just because I worked there a few years before and the staff at that time were not honest.

Sorry if this all sounds waffly, just trying to get everything in so as not to drip feed.

My question is basically, whats likely to come of this? I mean, they are probably going to question the woman who handed it in now. Who presumably will say the same as me, and say I gave it to her as she had offered as she was going that way, and she handed it in and that was the end of it. I cannot see any reason for her to have taken it, took the cash then went on to hand it in, that makes no sense so I do think either, someone else found it first, swiped the cash then left the purse before I found it, or the person who lost it is trying it on. But how on earth can this be proved? Are the police likely to turn up to arrest me and question me officially? Is there a chance this will end up in court?! Did I commit a crime, rather than just being a bit dim, when passing the found property to someone else rather than physically taking it myself? So so panicky and might not be the best thing to write on here about it just incase it does end up more serious but, I don't know what to do. DH says just stop worrying, but I wish it was that easy!

To make matters a bit more confusing, when I was searching last night, it seems that some police forces say not to hand in things you find at all, and that the advice now is basically, take it home and put it on social media (as police don't deal with lost property due to cuts) and try to reunite it with its owner that way. That as long as you take reasonable steps to get it back to the owner, its fine. I would say that I took reasonable steps, however I didn't know that handing it in to the main desk was seemingly now classed as the wrong thing to do?! I also thought it would be illegal to open someone elses purse and would open you up to a fair few accusatins too but apparently you are meant to open it, take pictures of the ID (remove dientifying details though) and post it online, along with calling the number on the back of any cards that are in there). All so very confusing and doing nothing at all for my anxiety issues.

Just incase the post has came out too waffly to understand, short version - I found a purse, but passed it onto someone else to hand in, it seems they did hand it in, but now the owner is claiming money is missing. Am I likely to get arrested for theft or something here? And if so, how on earth do I prove innocence?!

Please, I already know I made a few really stupid moves in all of this and as I said, really wish I had just left the thing where it was. I was paranoid in not giving it to the restaurant (though still think its more likely the person would try to claim at a main desk rather than actually in there) and possibly really stupid to pass it to someone else for convenience sake rather than struggling on to the main desk myself. So I do already know I was more than a bit dim. I also know in future, to not bother trying to help and just leave whatever where it is. I have definitely learnt my lesson in that. I just want to know if its possible to actually get charged for being an idiot basically, and how on earth I would defend myself about money that was apparently taken that I know nothing at all about and don't even know if it existed in the first place!

OP posts:
qazxc · 07/06/2019 09:30

I'm no expert but I'd assume nothing will come of it.
I'd assume they will check CCTV to check your story and whether you nicked the purse from owner.
If there was money in the purse, how would they prove that or that you or your friend had taken it?

BooksAreMyOnlyFriends · 07/06/2019 09:37

You didn't take any money. You 'handed' the purse to someone believing they would do the right thing with it. You've done nothing wrong. Please don't stress about it.

If I was the owner and had been careless leaving my stuff around, I would just be happy to have it back with my cards etc. The missing cash would be my own stupid fault.

AbsolutelyPetrified · 07/06/2019 09:37

I'd assume they will check CCTV to check your story and whether you nicked the purse from owner.

Well yeah thats what DH said. But, if they have tracked me from the CCTV then they already know I did not nick the purse, and that I found it just lying there. I am very confused about how they can get my name and address from CCTV though? A few things about this confuse me and I am probably massively overthinking it but having 2 police officers randomly turn up at my door has really got to me. I have anxiety issues to start with and this has just knocked it into overdrive!

If there was money in the purse, how would they prove that or that you or your friend had taken it?

Again, I have no idea. It just makes no sense to me that there would have been cash in there, unless as I said, someone else found it, emptied it then left it, or the owner is just saying it. As I didn't take it, and I would think if the woman who handed it in had taken cash from it, she would have just discarded the purse instead of actually handing it in? I have no way of contacting her really either as shes just kind of a friend of a friend who I see every now and again. Wasn't even sure if I got her name right when giving it to the police, but the description was obviously right so they will be able to track the CCTV of that for sure..

I could probably find her number if I asked around a bit on facebook (shes not on facebook, that would make it easier) but..that seems a bit OTT for whate happened? Would feel a bit stalker like and if it did end up in court it would look odd that I had tried contacting her after police came, collusion or something? Maybe hugely overthinking things now but honestly, am shaking and cannot think of anything else. The way they were being with me, they might aswell have outright called me a thief tbh, and I have never stolen anything in my life and have infact been the victim of theft and the police weren't interested then. Which is kind of winding me up a little too.

OP posts:
GreenTulips · 07/06/2019 09:39

Well they have to base a case on facts

They can not prove you took the money because you didn’t - they maybe able to prove your friend took it, if there is CCTV footage

They will have seen you leave the restaurant - they may not have seen footage of your friend leaving the toilet.

Either way - you tried to do a good deed, police were probably annoyed at having to investigate such a small issue

Don’t worry about it

AbsolutelyPetrified · 07/06/2019 09:40

You didn't take any money. You 'handed' the purse to someone believing they would do the right thing with it. You've done nothing wrong. Please don't stress about it.

Thats what DH said, but surely it is a big deal if the police are showing up at my door to grill me about it all? I still do think she did the right thing, it makes no sense for her to have emptied it then handed it in. Its all so so confusing to me and as I said, I am probably massively overreacting but..I cannot help it Sad

OP posts:
RickAstleyGaveMeUp · 07/06/2019 09:43

If you were a suspect you would be offered a recorded interview, under caution, with your full legal rights given.

They took a short witness statement only. Therefore you are a witness not a suspect. Try not to stress.

WhoWasIt · 07/06/2019 09:43

How did the police get your name and address?

Crunchymum · 07/06/2019 09:45

Money could have been taken before you found it? Most people would discard a purse once they've taken the case???

If you are inclined to steal someone's money, you aren't the same type of person inclined to do the right thing and hand it in??

Crunchymum · 07/06/2019 09:45

Case = cash

user1486131602 · 07/06/2019 09:46

Sounds like they wanted you to corroborate the evidence they have against the other person.

wowfudge · 07/06/2019 09:48

The police will have been able to tell you were being honest. It's far more likely, if there had been money in the purse, that it had been taken before you even found it. Please stop worrying about it. You did the right thing in handing it in, even if that was via someone else. You or the other woman would have to be really dim to remove the cash then hand it in. Presumably she gave her name and contact details when she handed it in and that's how the police knew to speak to you about it at all.

Stop catastrophising and don't try to contact the owner. You did a good thing, just leave it at that.

DonkeyHohtay · 07/06/2019 09:48

My question is basically, whats likely to come of this?

probably nothing.

AbsolutelyPetrified · 07/06/2019 09:49

They can not prove you took the money because you didn’t

Well yeah, I am 100% sure they cannot prove I took anything out of it because I didn't. But, is it possible to get into trouble for picking it up but then not actually handing it in myself? Thats kind of getting to me and making me kick myself looking back. Google tells me different things, and as I said basically says handing it in at all is usually not a good thing to do, and you should take other steps to reunite it with its owner. Apparently theres something called 'theft by finding' which would presumably be what it was here IF it applies to this case. I am a bit worried that they don't believe I gave it so her, given how suspicious they seemed to be. From memory though she didn't have a bag with her so again presumably the CCTV if they go back to it will show her leaving with it in her hand and doing whatever with it.

Seems odd to me, that they can sit through hours of CCTV footage because someone claims money was taken from a purse that was handed in, when they are so short staffed and underfunded and apparently cannot investogate crimes with large losses? As I said, they wouldn't investigate fraud on my bank a few years back and actually said that they don't have the time or resources for such a 'small' loss (was over 2k..) so am I to take from that that the woman said she lost over 2k in cash?!

Ugh. Just all going round and round in my head and getting more scared and also random angry, and panicky by the minute. I might have to try going out if painkillers work properly, just to chill my brain out a bit Confused

OP posts:
ShitAtScarbble · 07/06/2019 09:51

How did the Police trace you? If you didn't hand it in how on earth was there ever any record that you found/had the purse?

Raera · 07/06/2019 09:52

Perhaps the owner of the purse is not being truthful about the amount of cash in it?
To claim on insurance

AbsolutelyPetrified · 07/06/2019 09:52

How did the police get your name and address?

Absolutely no idea and another of the things thats stressing me a lot.

They took a short witness statement only. Therefore you are a witness not a suspect. Try not to stress.

Thats a good point and something thats calmed me slightly. I guess if they did think I did something wrong they would have taken me to the station rather than just chatting on my doorstep. Mind, still makes me think they are going to be back later with handcuffs, which again DH says is stupid.

I think the main problem here to be quite honest is my anxiety. I kind of know I am being stupid, yet cannot help it.

Though I do genuinely want to know if its possible for me to actually get in trouble for this. Googling like mad, which really is not helping matters.

OP posts:
wowfudge · 07/06/2019 09:54

In the nicest possible way, please get a grip. You haven't stolen anything and you did the right thing. Step away from Google and have a cup of tea. The person who lost the purse is either telling the truth about the cash or lying and either way may make an insurance claim, for which they'll need a crime reference number. The police are just carrying out basic checks to try to establish whether there was cash in the purse.

Jocasta2018 · 07/06/2019 09:54

They took a witness statement so I don't think they're accusing you of anything. The 'money' - there is no proof there was any money in the wallet to begin with - could've been taken before you found the purse.

Can I just ask.... Why the hell are they giving this so much police time? A friend had a trailer stolen from his property and had clear CCTV evidence of the offenders.
A lot of local properties & businesses were also targeted that night - again plenty of CCTV evidence of the gang involved and there was no action taken by the police. They gave my friend a crime reference number & told him to claim it on his insurance!

qazxc · 07/06/2019 09:55

Maybe they got your name from your friend.
As in she left her name and number at the main desk when handing in the purse.
So when Purse owner contacted police, they went to talk to her and she gave them your name. So they have now come to see you.
They have to investigate and follow up leads, but you haven't done anything wrong and there won't be any proof that you have so it won't go anywhere.

DrinkSangriaInThePark · 07/06/2019 09:56

I would chill out, you're escalating it all.
Facts: Someone lost their purse.
Money was taken from it.
You found it.
You gave it to someone to hand in.
They handed it in.

If you lose a purse, chances are money will be taken from it. Any number of people could have taken the money, it's actually not a big deal, or something that will be followed up further, I guarantee you.

AbsolutelyPetrified · 07/06/2019 09:56

How did the Police trace you? If you didn't hand it in how on earth was there ever any record that you found/had the purse?

They just said they had CCTV footage of me picking it up. Asked me if I wanted to see it and I said no as, well why would I. I knew it was just lying there, I knew I picked it up, so I didn't need to see it.

I was baffled as to how they got my name and address from it though, but now people have mentioned it, it might well have been that they have spoke to 'friend' first and she gave my name or something and thats how they got my details. Mind, if thats what has happened, I am shocked as we really don;t know each other that well and I might have even got her first name wrong when giving it (wrong as in saying Ann rather than Anna or something, not totally wrong) so would be surprised if she knew my first and last..

OP posts:
QuestionableMouse · 07/06/2019 09:58

The money could have been taken before you found the purse. Please don't worry about it.

ElectricLions · 07/06/2019 09:58

Its the toilet element, lots of purses are nicked from and the purse itself is discarded in the sanitary bins. My friend used to have a job collecting sanitary bins, he said you would be amazed what people put in them.

It could look like you were avoiding cctv and using the toilets as a place to look through the purse.

But you have given your statement, so hopefully that is the end of it.

RickAstleyGaveMeUp · 07/06/2019 09:58

Yes, presumably your friend handed it in at the desk. Owner reunited with purse, reports theft. Police speak to friend. She says "Absolutely found it, she was going to hand it it but was too sore so I did it". Police check electoral roll for Mrs A. Petrified in your rough area. Get your address, knock on the door, ask if you were at the shopping centre and found a purse to confirm you're the correct Mrs A. Petrified. Ask a few questions, quick statement. Job done. Then they'll pop to the restaurant to see if there's any CCTV showing the original theft and that will be that.

wowfudge · 07/06/2019 09:58

They probably haven't looked through any CCTV footage. The person who handed it left their name and number, taken by the info desk staff so she could be thanked by the rightful owner in due course. Except the rightful owner had claimed there was £2k in it which is now missing (highly unlikely there was ever that much cash in it). So your acquaintance's number has been passed to the police and she's given them your contact details.