Most boring film you've ever seen?

[GunpowderGelatine]

I'm watching On Chesil Beach and I can't remember the last time I watched a film this dull. Only sticking with it to see how they do the, ahem, early arrival part. Thinking about it the book was fairly shite too.

What's the most boring film you've ever seen so I can avoid nights like this

Somewhere boy or Nowhere boy...that was dull as dishwater.

Ace Ventura (any of them)

Forest Gump- it goes on for a good hour longer than it needs to.

Dirty Dancing- not boring but it does make me want to be a bit sick in my mouth.

The holiday

Feel like there are more but I can’t think of them right now.

2001, Gravity and The Matrix were all appallingly tedious, but hands down my worst cinema experience was Andrei Tarkovsky's The Mirror, a Russian art house film which a friend dragged me to in my 20s. Literally didn't understand a minute of it.

DH and I didn’t particularly enjoy The English Patient but we’ve definitely seen worse. However, Adam & Joe’s parody The Toy Patient brought us so much joy. We laughed ourselves senseless and “ooh, it’s hot in here” stuck as a catchphrase that we still use to this day.

The Matrix, Eternal Sunshine, LOTR, Avatar, Total Recall... some of the best sci fi and fantasy films of all time! Raiders of the Lost Ark is an absolute classic and Withnail & I is one of the funniest films ever. Blimey I certainly do have different taste from the rest of you!

Just finished 'swimming with men'. Dull. I wanted to love it but it was not good.

Lord of the rings and atonement were just long and dreary.

What's that one with Ewan McGregor, think it's got 'fish' in its title? Fuck me, that was dire

Lord of the rings - dull and wooden
The snowman (Michael Fassbender) - truly dreadful
King Arthur - even dh said what is this shit to that one and he'll sit through most things , lasted 10 mins

@evil that was so terrible I instantly forgot it

Oh I know the fish one you mean that was dross.

I did like the one he did with Jim Carey I love you Philip Morris, that was totally unexpected!

ET - still never watched the whole thing.

Any Star Wars film, snorfests.

Lost in translation, drive (utter guff) and the pelican brief. My friend kept saying how amazing the Pelican Brief was and Denzel is usually a good bet. I fell asleep during it,the next day she put it on again and I fell asleep again.

The Ewan McGregor one was Salmon Fishing in the Yemen.

TrumpsFerret The Snowman was dreadful. I'd read the book and throughout the film thought they'd based it on an entirely different book to the one I read.

Mr Turner. My God, the torture. I thought it'd be interesting as I work in the art world. Fuck was it not. Stranded in the middle of French countryside with no other telly and no internet and I still chose an early night over such a boring endless film! Also one based on a video game, came out couple years ago, went with kids and gladly slept through it.

My friend Jeffrey Dahmer zzzz

Different movie, same name Cassandra.

The Thin Red Line. Went to see that with my jet lagged ex and my best friend. Ex (who had chosen the film) sat on the aisle and immediately fell into a deep sleep. Best friend and I were trapped because it was a pretentious art house cinema and ex was very fast asleep, and any attempt I made to wake him resulted in furious tutting and glaring. It was sooooooo long. and dull. By the end we were weeping silent tears of holding in the hysteria. And the arthouse wankers were also credit nazis so having sat through about 40 hours of tedium we couldn’t leave until they’d all discovered who the key grip was and who wrangled the lizards or whatever.

You’d think we’d have learned but best friend and I also went to the same pretentious cinema to watch American Beauty (complete bollocks). We weren’t trapped that time but did become hysterical at the wanky plastic bag bit, and also at the director’s name. The credit nazis were at that one too. Trying to leave was like being part of a poorly organised Mexican wave in a library.

Moulin Rouge - fortunately DH and I had the sense to watch that at home so we were free to switch it off after 10 minutes. I must ask best friend for his views on that one. If he’s watched it all the way through I’ll think less of him

Thanks teyem.

Roma. I watched it with DS, who’s well into arty films.

At one point there was a lingering closeup of a dog turd.

‘It’s so evocative, I can actually smell that,’ enthused DS.

Actually, one of our dogs had farted. That was the only mildly amusing moment of the whole nine (or so it felt) hours.

Oh god, and a German film called The White Ribbon.

What the ever-loving fuck that was all about I’ll never know.

Locke. The one where it’s just Tom hardy driving his car- basically a giant monologue.
It has great reviews, but me and dp were so bored!! I’ve heard others say it’s great so we must not “get” that type of film.

The beach. Although it pains me as I love leo so much, but even his face can’t keep me from switching off every time.

Just come back from it!! Three hours! Three hours of utter, utter nonsense. Soooo bored. If ever my teenage DS needs proof I love him more than anything, the fact I just sat through Marvel something because he was sick on Friday and missed going when all his mates went.

Has anyone else mentioned Anna and the King yet?

It’s fucking awful, bored me to tears. It seemed to go on forever.

I had to go to the cinema with my friend who wanted to watch it. I’ve never forgiven her

I can't believe the shawahank redemption has been mentioned so much. Honestly I think it's one of the greatest films ever made! I named my son after one of the characters!
P

Shawshank* typing the in the dark sorry!!