Has anyone got all normal children?

[CandyPuff]

I have 2. The first one is so easy going. She's a teenager and she's lovely company. She always has been. Full of life and adventure, enthusiastic, chatty

The second one has mental health issues, is anxious. She is argumentative and stubborn. She doesn't want to do anything and wants everything her own way. She doesn't compromise and screams and shouts ALOT.

I don't know what I did wrong with her? She is so hard to parent and she worries and upsets me

And that is the problem isn't it year. I totally get that teachers have a whole class of 30 kids to meet the needs of. But what that MEANS is actually that the school can NOT meet my daughter's needs. If the teacher is too busy to remember not to move my daughter's table space 3 times in one week, to not sit her next to the naughry boy who keeps trying to show her his penis, to let her change for PE in privacy. If the SLT/SENCO don't have time to meet with her 1 on 1 on a regular basis, then she is not going to recover/thrive. And it's not just my kid. School environment is not adequate for many kids

Honestly, I think ‘normal’ is a massive red herring. There really is no such thing, imho.

Sorry you’re struggling op I hope things improve for you and your dd2 soon.

CandyPuff

I believe your issue is with the government then...

School budget cuts mean that we are running a much tighter ship. I know my school just doesn’t have the staff to supervise a child getting changed one to one. Our SLT are doing class cover where it’s needed and the outside organisations that used to help us and the children with additional needs have all lost their funding. The schools for children with additional needs have also lost funding so can’t take on as many children.

The issues with seating arrangements is separate. I would ask the teacher if there is a reason for her to move three times. See what’s said and go from there. Please try to have some sympathy for the ‘naughty boy’. He’s going through his own issues as well. I’m not saying your DD should be sitting by him but maybe they sit them together so the teacher/support staff can help them together and they don’t try to stretch themselves too thin.

They sat my daughter, who was sexually abused by classmates next to a boy who was repeatedly trying to show her his penis

I understand the issues facing teachers and schools. It's not my concern here. My concern is finding an environment where my child can recover/improve/be stable

It's not just pressures on teachers, though I do understand that. Some teachers are just more empathetic and kind. Some really do seem impatient with any kind of issue or special needs, and my DD's class teacher at the moment is like that.

If the teacher is kind and understanding, they may still be busy and not always able to give every child the attention they need/want, but it isn't as bad as an unpleasant teacher because at least there's an understanding atmosphere and someone they can trust. I don't tar them all with the same brush at all, but there is such a thing as a teacher who is useless with anxiety.

Candy, amazingly we've also had the being sat next to horrible boy situation. No penis AFAIK, but pawing at and molesting her . Very luckily I'm able to tell the HOY about things like this and she will step in, but the class teacher gives no shits.

WTF I've 3 DS's Who have achieved wonderfully despite shit times
I have CP..... Does that make any of us " Normal'"
What a strange outlook on humanity.... That's not normal

Forgot to mention I have a diagnosis of Bipolar 1 1/2! Is that normal
I am my boy's Normal

Well I think we all have normal children but environmental factors decide how they will develop.

My son, my only child, had 10 fingers and toes and is gifted but life events meant he has mental health problems and needs a lot of support from me even though he is an adult. I try to be there for him at all times.

It took a lot of talking and counselling to get to the bottom of it, awful bosses ripping a sensitive soul like him to pieces, bullying at school, periods of unemployment, life stresses but we hold it together and he knows I am always there for him.

I have no doubt that if we'd we'd been well off enough to live in a country home with no money worries and he's been home schooled he's have been fine but that isn't always possible especially as a single mum.

brink it's just not good enough is it? I would love to be able to home school. Or to be able to afford private with smaller class sizes

Only on MN could the word 'normal' be offensive!