What's in your Room 101?

[tulippa]

Sorry if this has been done before but I sometimes think about what I would put in Room 101 if I was ever on the programme. After much deliberating, I have narrowed it down to:

1. Other People at Petrol Stations. Yes I get not everyone wants to use pay at pump or stretch the hose round to the other side of their car but what DO people do when they enter the shop when there's a massive queue of cars waiting to fill up? Fall into an abyss trying to reach the Maltesers that takes them 15 minutes to haul themselves out of? See also Other People at Cash Machines.

1. Baby Showers. Just really sexist and weird. Why aren't men allowed to celebrate the imminent arrival of your baby? Why perpetuate the idea that child rearing is for women only and that's before you get on to the grabbiness (might be reading too much into this here).

1. I know this one is irrational but crockery and containers that tell you what to put in them. You know like caddies that come in sets of three with tea, coffee and sugar written on them. I don't want to be bossed around by inanimate objects - I will choose what I put in my containers thank you! See also ceramic words some place around their house - LOVE in the living room, RELAX in the bathroom.

What would you put in your Room 101?

@lottielady I"m stealing stealth sultana

Drivers who don't indicate

People who say 'LITERALLY' all the bloody time

Gemma bloody Collins

Daily Mail superlatives of women 'pouring' themselves into dresses, 'flaunting' their bikini bodies and 'showing off' some body part when it's just a bloody photo of them

God I could go on. Great thread.

Men who sneeze stupidly loudly. Always bloody men.

Skirting boards.
Pomegranates.
Celery.

Strategically Incompetent Man and Tactically Lazy Woman at work

I had others too but they've largely been listed

My bloody anxiety, I'm getting better with controlling it, I detest the feeling when it hits me, I'd love to punch it in the face x

'Men who sneeze stupidly loudly. Always bloody men."

That s my DP. Sounds like he's trying to wake the dead

1/ people who drill a fucking hole in their exhaust (and other ways of achieving that effect), because they think it makes their little second hand go-faster-striped shitbox car sound like an Indy 500 racer. Especially the little swine who keeps gunning his up my road all day and night, including frequently at 4am.

2/ people who idle their engine outside my home, making the walls vibrate and my teeth rattle.

3/ people who park outside my home and decide to hold an impromptu music festival.

4/ people who think the small park outside my home (and, due to proximity, the surrounding streets) is a free of law dog toilet. Pick your fucking dogs shit up. I really don't want to look up from my worktop that's under my kitchen window at your dog shitting while I'm preparing my meals but picking it up might at least slightly mitigate your absolutely disgusting entitled attitude.

And mine. You can also hear him cough about 1/2 a mile away

1. People who seem to have no awareness of the people around them in shops and grocery stores and park their cart at a diagonal, blocking the entire aisle while they contemplate a row of tinned tomatoes for ten minutes.

1. People who get huffy when I bring my disabled child into the grocery store and expect us to go around them instead of just quickly letting us past them and down the aisle. He's got cerebral palsy and can't walk without holding onto his walker or the shopping cart, but you are an able bodied thirty year old man. Stop being a lazy, insensitive asshat, thanks.

1. Manspreading. Enough said.

1. The toxic political views of the Daily Mail, Fox News, and similar far right conspiracy theorists masquerading as "journalists," not to mention DM's obsession with denigrating everything that Meghan Markle says and does.

1. People who drive ten miles under the speed limit but then speed up the second you try to go around them to prevent you from passing.

1. Greedy people who pile their plate with four helpings of everything before everyone has been served, leaving a tiny amount for the rest of the table only to then wind up throwing half the food away at the end of the meal.

1. Parents who check out of parenting the second they get to a public space, leaving total strangers to spot their children to keep them from flinging themselves head first off the top of the playground structure or running into a highly trafficked road.

1. People who watch videos or listen to music on their phone without headphones in public spaces.

1. One uppers who always have it worse than you, no matter the situation.

10. Anti-vaxxers.

loud sneezing that is (sorry!)

Number 1 noisy eaters,sluppers, chewers etc

And my biggest is assholes who can't behave in the cinema! I am thinking of giving up going to the cinema ,(apart from mornings when no-one is there) because people don't STFU and also to the parents who let their kids talk, run around kick the chairs pisses me right off! If your child can't be quiet and looses interest in the movie maybe they should watch it the comfort of their own home .

Bluebottles.
Annoying buzzy little fuckers

People who eat cereal and consider it food.

People who scrabble in the popcorn and take big noisy handfuls for no fucking reason, and continue to make noise during the silent bit at the start with the film title.

I no longer tolerate going to the cinema with other people.

1. People who are too smiley.
2. Noisy eaters
3. People who make unnecessary noises, encompassing whistling, tapping, foot dragging etc
4. The man who waited until Johnny Depp's grand finale speech during the latest Fantastic Beasts to start crunching his cheetos down my ear and yapping away about soem nonsensical crap (I've waited nearly two years for this you complete bastard!)
5. Spiders aka evil little shits with no purpose except lying in wait to scare the shit out of me
6. Other people's children

Yeah, I think I have a few tolerance issues

1. People who are too smiley.
2. Noisy eaters
3. People who make unnecessary noises, encompassing whistling, tapping, foot dragging etc
4. The man who waited until Johnny Depp's grand finale speech during the latest Fantastic Beasts to start crunching his cheetos down my ear and yapping away about soem nonsensical crap (I've waited nearly two years for this you complete bastard!)
5. Spiders aka evil little shits with no purpose except lying in wait to scare the shit out of me
6. Other people's children

Yeah, I think I have a few tolerance issues

Northern Irelands political parties. No explanation needed.

Grey jogging bottoms and horror of horrors a grey hoodie worn as a combo. Wear them in public and you've either given up on life or you've just come out of prison.

People who ask stupid questions eg
"I can book you in at 10am".
"Do you have anything earlier?" - If I did, I would have given you an earlier time.
"Can I speak to xx?"

"Sorry, she's not in today".
" Is she not? "
No she really isn't or do you think I'm lying?

Refuse collectors. I know they do a hard job and they are essential but do they have to be total twats? They don't pull in to collect refuse bags but stop in the middle of the road during rush hour, throw the recycling food bins around and don't replenish recycling bags when requested.

People who say pacifically when they really mean specifically

companies that advertise a job and when you click it's commission only and no employment contract or conditions. So not a job.

Hot weather in the UK.
People in my way when I'm food shopping. ( I'm in their way as well!)

Part timers at work who moan about being exhausted. (And no they don't have children or elderly relatives to look after). They boil my piss.

Inspirational quotes

Yes! To people who answer the phone to say they can't talk. Just don't pick up then you twat!

People who drive up behind me on a motorway and flash their lights. I can't even describe how much I fucking HATE you!!!!!

People who argue about everything just for the sake of it. I'm looking at you my friend's DH who I have just been on holiday with 😬😬😬