Please help, poorly newborn

[Bitchfromhell]

Ds is 12 days old. Delivery via c section after difficult pg.

We discharged from hospital after 24 hours, he had a neonatal alert for his birth but it wasn't necessary. He was assessed by a paediatrician before discharge. All fine.

Since coming home he has a cough and jaundice. On day 4 we went to gp who referred him back to paediatric ward for reassessment. Again all clear.

The cough is viral and I can't put him down. He doesn't sleep other than on me. He coughs every time I lie him down. The wailing is constant unless he's feeding. I'm at the end of my tether. Please help.

Have you tried lying him on an incline? Books under the end of DS cot used to help a bit. However, he’s still very little, I’d probably want him to be seen by a health professional again if it’s not improving at all.

Have you tried raising the top end of the cot/Moses basket up so it helps keep his nose clearer?

You could also try a white noise app/ white noise video on YouTube? My DS is an awful sleeper, but the rain sounds send him to sleep within minutes even on a bad day

Cosleeping?
Dummy?

Definitely get him checked out gain though.

Call your midwife - are you still under their care? It's unlikely for such a young child to have a viral cough, and you need to unpick how much is just general newborn misery and getting the hang of things (the only sleeping on you is perfectly normal) and what is more concerning. Are you seeing weight gain and lots of wet/dirty nappies?

Has a mw seen him in last day or so? A viral cough can turn nasty quite quickly so might be worth calling gp. Also humidifier, fresh air, incline the bed or use a car seat/bouncer etc. At such a young age it is probably difficult to tell whether his crying and reluctance to be laid down is anything more than being a nb rather than related to the cough.

sling. can you try one?

Thanks all.

We have the Moses on an incline. He coughs and then screams until I put him back on the boob.

We've had to cosleep, his preferred is in my arms but we did manage 2 hours on the mattress this am.

We were seen by the midwife on Friday. All fine.

Friday is a while ago guven how young your baby is, give your gp a call.

Tried him in the sling yesterday but he screamed until I took him out.

Midwife was happy with his weight, he's lost a bit but was 10lb at birth. His nappies are wet and poopy, he's our first so no comparison.

It’s ok to call a midwife and ask for one to come round. Even if it’s just to tell you that the baby is fine. That’s what they are there for.

Slings take a bit of practice, and actually I was too scared to use when baby was very very tiny.

Do you have a partner, mother, friend? Someone who can take baby out in the pram for a walk, even for twenty minutes half an hour, so you can just clear your head, have a shower/ uninterrupted sit down & rest without the screaming.

Also you should definitely either go back to the GP or ask your midwife to come in as pp suggested.
It’s so hard when you are new at it.

We're going back to the gp today. I just feel like I'm failing.
Dh is amazing and is doing literally everything for me. He can't settle the baby through. So I can only pass him across when I need a quick shower etc. As he just screams.
Dh also won't go outside with the baby whilst he has this cough. It's sleeting here currently tbf.

I'd be worried about the constant feeding.......Has his w3ight been checked ?? He might not be getting enough due to tongue tie or your flow not quite coming in.

Does he cough when laying on his back? If so is it possible he could have silent reflux?! May explain lack of weight gain 🤷🏼‍♀️

www.thesleeplady.co.uk/silent-reflux-tips/

Look out for these symptoms

Gp was great said the problem is me, which as a new mum is the best possible outcome. Baby is fine, his heart and lungs sound fine, he might have some sort of upper respiratory irritant but it's nothing to worry about. The paediatric diagnosis of a viral cough is bullshit apparently, and I'm welcome back at the gp surgery every week until i feel less anxious about him
His best advice is to put the baby down more, if he's dry and fed but he coughs a bit he won't spontaneously combust! Who knew!
Ironically the baby slept through the entire appointment and examination and is still sleeping now. Gp said lack of sleep in me is the biggest concern, baby is doing fine.
The jaundice is normal for ebf babies and to get the health visitors to monitor it.
I think I have baby blues tbh and need to sleep it off.

Lovely you sound like every new Mum. If you are ever concerned by your baby do go back and get him checked. Babies are much easier and quicker to check out than an older person. Your GP will always fit you in on the same day for a small baby.
If his weight is doing well then I would get him a dummy. It may help with the cough and sucking is a soothing reflex for the baby.

Oh and babies always sleep when you go out somewhere.

You’re not failing. You are a new mum and it is frightening, overwhelming, emotional, amazing, exhausting, often depressing all in one go. Your baby is so young. You have been carrying him around for 9 months. Of course he wants you to carry on. He will get there. Sounds like your GP was thorough and sensible but do keep calling on Healthcare Professionals if you are worried.

All parents have been there. It will get easier.

Thank you, a dummy is going to help I think. A lot of his "feeding" is just chomping on my nipple I think.
I'm also going to get a pump so dh can have him for a couple of hours in the evening. Not that dh doesn't do that anyway but he just can't settle him atm.

He also advised to go for a walk, get out of the house each day. That sounds good just now.

Try the tiger in a tree hold, honestly, it’s a miracle. Even if DH does it so you can sleep.

Try swaddling, putting a hot water bottle in the Moses basket and a nightsreas you’ve slept in, obv take the hot water bottle out just before you put the baby in.
It’s so hard OP but I promise it will get easier.

I would get him checked over too but hopefully the above tips help you get some sleep x

Doctor sounds lovely. Do take him up on the offer of going as often as you need to.

Congratulations on a lovely baby.

Glad your GP is nice, I would take up that offer of a weekly appointment, gives you something to aim for.
I had a (stormy, snowy) January baby and got an ikea sheepskin to put under her in the pram. Warm. As. Toast.