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Original poster

Boyfriend claiming and I'm pregnant

170 replies

nicoleginge · 01/12/2018 15:09

So I've moved in with my boyfriend and he's claiming Job Seekers Allowance and I've happily fallen pregnant.
He is looking for a job and he's really trying.
We are currently living with his parents and we both individually pay rent to them.
I do not support him money wise and we are now saving up for a baby.
I'm only on a 16 hour contract and Male about £130 a week.

How will this affect his JSA?
Because we have been told by some people that his would stop all together and we will have to live of £130 a week and save for a baby which is impossible.
It's really stressing me out.

About 2 years ago they took me to court for apparently frauding them. Which I didn't but because I didn't have enough evidence. Apparently a phone record and written evidence from the job center wasn't enough they still got me don't for it.

What do we do. We just want to have a happy life and get through this pregnancy without so much stress.

OP posts:
milkandpancakes · 02/12/2018 11:52

I really hate the new punitive benefits system and what it's doing to people but when I read a post like this with someone "happily" Hmm falling pregnant under circumstances that are so very very obviously not financially viable I do get pissed off and have a little Daily Mail moment I'm ashamed to say. It's not a "little miracle" if you've not been using birth control of any kind and I highly doubt you were told a pregnancy was 100% impossible, were you? And yes you are committing fraud claiming separately while living together. I hope both you and your partner can get it together over the next few months and start bringing in more money, it sounds like you both need to grow the fuck up to be honest.

everydaymum · 02/12/2018 12:01

"I love my job and would never leave it"......you're about to have a baby and DP isn't working. You don't have the luxury of keeping your pt job if there's a chance of getting ft work. Why should anyone else (taxpayer, parents), have to support you if you're not willing to put yourself out??

ILovePierceBrosnan · 02/12/2018 12:06

I don’t want to add to the kicking but I totally see why people are posting what they are.

OP you need to take responsibility for your life. That means hard decisions rather than doing what you feel like and hoping it all works out. You know about benefit fraud already, you know you’re not working full time, your boyfriend isn’t working at all and you still chose to put yourself in this position.

You do reap as you sow.

Many of us worked full time when pregnant. Many of us did jobs we didn’t like. Many of us waited for a one time to have a child because we couldn’t afford it. You’ve not chosen to do that so you are now depending on other people to fund and support you. I wouldn’t want to be you but I can also see that you don’t want to be you right now either...or rather you want your choices to work but can’t see that you are the person who has to make them work. Don’t make any more bad choices. You need to accept that sometimes life isn’t going to be what you want it to be immediately but you work towards a goal.

In the meantime I don’t have advice because you have created a difficult situation. Who did you think would fund it?

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Benefits Families
Bluntness100 · 02/12/2018 12:10

Op. How old are you? I'm guessing you're very young.

It's good you have the support of parents, yes you have got yourself into a pickle, pregnant, skint, unemployed partner, no home of your own, and likely to be committing benefit fraud again.

You and your partner will need to be honest about you living together, then understand what benefits you're entitled to. Call them and ask them, as you can't keep committing fraud again.

Once you understand you need to start thinking of your future, how to pay for your child, children are not cheap, but also who will care for your kid whilst you and hopefully your partner works.

Right now though change thI claim to say you live together, and do it before they catch you. And they will catch you. So get it sorted first. Then work out wher you are.

Does your boyfriend have any skills? Could he advertise his services as handy man for example, get some tools. I think the pair of you need to explore all options to make yourself financially responsible for not just your selves, but your child.

Bluerussian · 02/12/2018 12:13

I don't get you at all. You say you are saving up for a baby but are already pregnant, have no proper home and a partner with no job. Have previously been done for benefit fraud. Are you out of your mind?

BishBoshBashBop · 02/12/2018 12:29

But if Op isn’t the one claiming the benefit it’s not possible for her to get herself in hot water.

She has done in the past it seems.

If they don't declate the changes now then she will be in the future with CTC etc.

Caprisunorange · 02/12/2018 12:32

Doesn’t matter though bosh does it? Posters are telling her she is going to get done for benefit fraud because her partner claims JSA and it’s not true

dontalltalkatonce · 02/12/2018 14:04

All I was asking is if it would affect his jsa that's all.

And you've been told yes, it already should have. He should have informed the JobCentre that day you moved in that he was part of a couple and declared your income. He is engaging in benefit fraud just now and all the time he hasn't declared that he is part of a couple. Of course it's going to affect his JSA if it's income-based, which my guess it is.

Loving your 16 hour job doesn't prevent you from working another one for more hours. And your being pregnant in no way prevents your boyfriend from working.

Bluntness100 · 02/12/2018 14:13

Agree, actually if she's getting no benefits it's him that's committing benefit fraud not the op.

BishBoshBashBop · 02/12/2018 14:25

Doesn’t matter though bosh does it? Posters are telling her she is going to get done for benefit fraud because her partner claims JSA and it’s not true

Well it kind of does. OP has already been done for it once. Yes at the moment it is him. Is she going declare she is with him and living together when when it comes to CTC? History would say no.

Mymycherrypie · 02/12/2018 18:24

Ok, if she asked what would you do?

Here’s what would I would do;

  • seriously consider whether I wanted to raise a child in such difficult circumstances

If so

  • get a second job ASAP
  • ultimatum, he gets a fucking job or I’m leaving because I’m not going to be the only one financially supporting this baby. If it’s transport related, he gets a bike. If it’s attitude related, he gets the push because if he’s not willing to scrub floors to support his family now, he’s now worth it.
  • start looking at areas where there are more job opportunities (there MUST be a pub nearby, even in the remotest of areas, there are pubs. Offer to clean it, pull pints etc. And if not, he has the INTERNET. Set up an online business doing ANYTHING)
  • move back in with my parents because if you both have benefit fraud claims against you, you truly are fucked.
  • start a claim as a single person
  • take responsibility for my fucking self
LizzieBennettDarcy · 02/12/2018 18:29

So no home of your own, and barely any income so you've deliberately chosen to bring a child into a life of poverty.

How lucky for them Hmm

backaftera2yearbreak · 02/12/2018 18:39

I’ve read some sanctimonious judgemental shite on this site before but Christ, you lot really have taken the piss with your comments here. Miserable fucking cow bags. Honestly.

She’s not claiming a benefit so she cannot be committing benefit fraud for a start.

BishBoshBashBop · 02/12/2018 18:41

I’ve read some sanctimonious judgemental shite on this site before but Christ, you lot really have taken the piss with your comments here. Miserable fucking cow bags. Honestly.

Oh the irony Hmm

dontalltalkatonce · 02/12/2018 18:49

She’s not claiming a benefit so she cannot be committing benefit fraud for a start.

That's why she was told that he is as he has not declared that he is part of a couple now so yes, his JSA will be affected.

FannyFanackerpants71 · 02/12/2018 18:58

@backaftera2yearbreak

Take another break!

backaftera2yearbreak · 02/12/2018 19:00

I may well do that. This used to be a lovely supportive place. Clearly not anymore!

GivingBloodFeelingGreat · 02/12/2018 19:01

This reply has been deleted

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backaftera2yearbreak · 02/12/2018 19:02

Couldn’t agree with you more!

Bluntness100 · 02/12/2018 19:06

What "lovely supportive" comments do you feel she should get then backafter? I'm guessing it's not calling her a miserable cow bag?

Should we tell her he won't have his benefits cut so it's ok to tell them he's living with her? Should we tell her that all this baby needs is love? Should we tell her we are shocked she was done on benefits fraud when she wasn't guilty? Should we tell her not to tell they are living rogether as they might not find Out, so they should continue to take the money?

What lovely supportive advice should us miserable cow bags give her? Do tell.

Mymycherrypie · 02/12/2018 19:07

Why would their children grow up hating them for ensuring they didn’t grow up in poverty? What a strange leap to make 😂

GivingBloodFeelingGreat · 02/12/2018 19:11

@Mymycherrypie

Because of their disgusting attitude towards others.

BishBoshBashBop · 02/12/2018 19:15

The nastiness of some people on here makes me sick. There is a reason I call them "Scummy Mummys"

Their children will probably grow up hating them. And rightly so.

ODFOD

tillytoodles1 · 02/12/2018 19:19

I think it's ridiculous to be so "happily pregnant" when you obviously can't afford it. How the hell did you think you'd manage? Just claim off the state.

WhatToDoAboutWailmerGoneRogue · 02/12/2018 19:20

GivingBloodFeelingGreat and backaftera2yearbreak Why are you wanting us to lie to OP and be supportive of her poor life choices that make her a burden to her family and the state?

Telling her everything will be fine would be doing her a disservice, because it won’t be. Her child will grow up in poverty, her family will resent her for willfully forcing them to support her and she may be done for benefit fraud. Again.

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