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Original poster

I think I've just been fired

433 replies

CinnamonVanilla · 17/10/2018 17:05

Boss found out that I applied for a job with our parent company. Supposed to be anonymous; but I'd have said when it was appropriate. Our HR director beat me to it; in front of a lot of people, apparently.

He took me into a room to say that it was humiliating; and means he no longer trusts me, so how do we move forward. He said my work is excellent but this is a big issue.

He's given me some time to think. Presumably he's expecting my notice this evening. I've been here just under two years so there's nothing I can do.

This has made my anxiety rocket and I don't know want to do.

OP posts:
Gemini69 · 18/10/2018 16:40

He said he would have preferred to be told that I was applying and would have supported me; but that it wasn't an issue.

this is bollocks OP.. you don't have to tell anyone when applying for
other positions..

Do NOT RESIGN .. don't worry about not being there 2 years... let the try to sack you and take it Legal .. go to the www.acas.org.uk it tells you everything you need to know OP Flowers

Gemini69 · 18/10/2018 16:41

www.acas.org.uk

it's CONFIDENTIAL... unlike your current place of employment Hmm

Myimaginarycathasfleas · 18/10/2018 16:50

I don’t agree that you are being managed out. They have acknowledged you have valuable skills and now know you want to progress. They don’t want to lose you, instead they are trying to find ways to retain you. Your applying without giving them a heads up has put them in a panic, because they would have to replace you, which may be difficult.

Use this to your advantage. Be positive about working for them but say you are looking for a challenge and promotion. See what they can offer as an incentive. It might be further training, giving you more responsibility, all things that could prepare you for advancement.

What you don’t have to do is apologise for wanting a better job. And you don’t need their permission to go after one.

Myimaginarycathasfleas · 18/10/2018 16:55

In the Civil Service (at least in my time) you did have to inform your manager if you were going for an internal job. So I can see that the OP might have broken protocol depending on the organisation she works for. But that’s no reason to make her feel bad about it.

SassitudeandSparkle · 18/10/2018 17:01

It doesn't sound as if you are being managed out to me either. Word may have got round that you are looking elsewhere now, which is probably why the colleague asked for details about the project.

For your own peace of mind, I would speak to HR to see their side of what happened. Did you put Boss down as a referee, was someone from HR in the interviews on the panel?

I do think that it is difficult to keep an application quiet when it's with the parent company tbh. There is nothing wrong with wanting to move on or apply for other jobs. It does seem to have come as a surprise to your company/current line management though, which is where they are coming from.

But I do think it's worth speaking to HR to see if it happened exactly in the way that your Boss said.

BlackrockMum · 18/10/2018 17:05

You haven't been dismissed and do not think you must resign. if your boss activities were to push you into resigning that would be constructive dismissal as some people have said, and you can be sure HR don't want that. I would alert HR immediately that you are being placed into a very difficult position, put on record exactly what was said and how you are interpreting it, and that you believe they should also be present at this meeting with your boss.

Say ( in writing) to your boss you cannot see how applying for a job within your organisation is anyway conduct that is a breach of his trust, and you were most surprised to hear this from him, as such you think you both need time to cool off and consider matters before any further discussions are had on this matter suggest a meeting in one weeks time.

Reason is I'm suspecting that he maybe got a shock at the public announcement that he felt he should have known first, and he was perhaps over emotive give him a few days and it will all disappear, perhaps needs HR to have a quiet word with him as to this was not appropriate to say .

Meanwhile when do you hear about other job?

BlackrockMum · 18/10/2018 17:09

sorry missed a page of the OP so missed some of your updates

MarshaBradyo · 18/10/2018 17:11

Wtf I surprised that’s legal

Do not hand in your notice

DarlingNikita · 19/10/2018 10:53

I'd go and talk to HR. Tell them about the 'in case you get hit by a bus' thing.

zzzzz · 19/10/2018 10:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 19/10/2018 11:06

HR's Job is to protect the Business, not its employees.

That is the most ridiculous statement I've ever read.
Employees are the back bone of any Business. Where would any business be with out decent employees.

Pebblesandfriends · 19/10/2018 11:11

Do not resign. If he tries to fire you go for unfair dismissal. I would be asking to speak to HR anyway about why you were even sent home. He's behaving like you did something wrong, which you absolutely didn't. You don't need to inform him of anything, unless it was a situation in which he has to sign off on your application, in which case apologise for not telling him but just explain you wanted to see if you got an interview before bothering him. If he felt humiliated that's on whoever told him, not you. As others have said, he should be cheering you on, not treating you like a small child.

rosinavera · 19/10/2018 11:23

I can't believe that you're thinking that this could be dismissal! In no way is looking for another job grounds for dismissal and I think your boss is totally out of order. I think as another poster has said, he is over-reacting and when he has had time to cool down he will realise this. Do not do anything OP and try not to worry. Big hug! xx

Original poster
CinnamonVanilla · 19/10/2018 12:02

Thanks all. Have resisted giving my notice in so far...

Manager has put a meeting in for me on Monday morning; for me to "present my thinking" about where we go from here.

I have no idea what to say; if I'm honest. I think objectively I should just tell him that I want to continue as we were; but realistically it's cold here now and I can't see it being a likely way forward. He's very warm with the rest of the team; it's been mentioned by people who work on different floors how noticeably cold he's being around me.

OP posts:
rosinavera · 19/10/2018 12:07

He is being ridiculous OP - please don't even THINK about resigning. Go to the meeting on Monday and if he is still trying to guilt-trip you I suggest that you make an appointment to see his superior.

Dontfeellikeaskeleton · 19/10/2018 12:10

So they are playing hard ball' you need to also.

You have to think about this from their perspective : it would not be good if they lost you. Are you easily replaceable? Is your job specialised /do you have lots of insider knowledge?

I'd approach the meeting on Monday the same asbhin: cold and objective. Yes, you applied for another job (promotion) but you are still dedicated to he project.

Don't quit, but job hunt.

Dontfeellikeaskeleton · 19/10/2018 12:11

The same as him

Obv

LonnyVonnyWilsonFrickett · 19/10/2018 12:11

He is being utterly ridiculous. There is nothing to prevent anyone applying for another job anywhere, at any time. You need to be completely bright and breezy about this: I saw an opportunity and applied for it, it's unfortunate HR breached my confidentiality over the application but I'm willing to overlook that. In terms of where we go from here, we go forward dear boss, of course we do. Now what was your thinking on project a/b/c?

Do not be drawn. Do not resign. If he continues to be ridiculous go back to the bigger boss and say 'I'm baffled by x's attitude, can you give me some tips on how to manage him?'

Head up, admit no wrong, bright and breezy at all times, with just an edge of puzzlement because it's so ridiculous. Treat it with the contempt it deserves.

Dontfeellikeaskeleton · 19/10/2018 12:13

Manager has put a meeting in for me on Monday morning; for me to "present my thinking" about where we go from here.

^^

This sounds a bit teacher /pupil to me - who the feck does he think is? Yes, you'll present your way of thinking! You applied for another job ffs

Not meaning to make this a femininist issue but would he have acted like this if you were a guy? Or should you just be grateful, as a little woman, to have this job at all?

MarshaBradyo · 19/10/2018 12:13

He sounds very unprofessional

DarlingNikita · 19/10/2018 12:14

"present my thinking"

What a drama queen.

Go along, be brisk, pleasant and professional, and say that as far as you're concerned it's business as usual. Remind him that he's said your work is excellent.

I wouldn't mention the cold behaviour. Treat it as what it is –an irrelevance to your work and performance.

Before this, I'd ask HR for clarity on the procedure/policy on applying for jobs. In more than one of my previous workplaces you only had to tell your manager if you got past an initial interview for an internal job and were invited to a second, more formal one. If your policy is anything like this then he is being utterly ridiculous; and it'd be good for your confidence and resolve to know where you stand formally speaking.

VimFuego101 · 19/10/2018 12:15

What Lonny said. Do not resign. Flatter your manager, tell him you love your job and the company and want to progress and be successful, ask him what he thinks the next steps are for your career and what other opportunities/ projects there are within the team. Do not go in there with the expectation you'll be sacked - approach it as a discussion on how you can expand your role, since they've acknowledged you are intelligent and do a good job.

YouBetterWOooOooOoo · 19/10/2018 12:20

Agree with DarlingNikita about the meeting, boss is having a big old sulk by the sounds of it!

Fluffychickenmonkey · 19/10/2018 12:20

Your boss sounds like a grade A arsehole

Racontuer · 19/10/2018 12:21

If you wish to leave / move on I would hold off handing in notice until you have something else concrete lined up. Meantime head down and ride it out. Those being cold to you are obviously taking it as a rejection and personal slight. I would say to them once, I'm sorry you feel this way, I wish to continue the relationship we had, I am keen to develop, that's all. If they are reasonable they will take it on board and appreciate your perspective. If not, then they are self centred and think they have a right to control and dictate your career and therefore your life. No good will ever come of working for or with them.
If you can afford it and feel strongly enough perhaps book on for 1 hour with an employment solicitor. I did once, and whilst not to take constructive dismissal action, it did help assert me in my position and what is reasonable or not within the workplace.