Christie D, I wasn’t smirking at you, I was just incredulous at how shit you are at your job, especially when people’s lives are at stake. You are a pompous and ignorant twat and your ‘friend’ looks like a bag of rusty spanners.
Probably not quite what you are looking for OP and a bit too “vaguebooking” for my liking, but there you go, I do want to say this out loud, but it would not be a good move!