Thick people

[sonlypuppyfat]

Most evenings DD sits in the front garden letting her pet rabbit run around the lawn. He is a normal shaped rabbit black with sticking up ears. Two young boys around 15 or so walked past and one asked what sort of dog it was

Funeral plan advert on the TV and DD asked what it was about - so I explained and said 'your grandmother has one'

She pipes up 'So when's the funeral?'

Like you get to chose the date

Occam glad you agree!! Even now I know, still can't really see the connection.

@ballseditupagain I tried explaining but was crying with laughter, she is my best friend and I’m very used to her daft ideas! She did phone her boyfriend just to check her theory, she was most disappointed that he didn’t know the future

I just have a mental picture of people spinning in circles and crashing into each other and falling over.

Eminybob, the channel islands are part of France I think but are crown dependencies. They're not part of the UK or British Isles, but inhabitats have a British passport. I Googled but it's confusing!

My DD still talks about a former classmate who said he was going to Blackpool 'to see the Northern Lights'.

Ha, that's my favourite

greentulips we had similar some years ago. I was taking the girls to Australia, in the days when schools were better about taking kids out in term time ( last few school days before Christmas).
One of the girls suggested to tell the school we were going over for a family funeral-9 months in advance!

Its a joke

My teen son would say it

Plus

Do you like cheese? Constantly. No idea what this is about

Plus

I like chicken wings

Random. He doesn’t, especially

I’m pretty sure they’re not part of France. Are they part of the British Isles? Is that different to Great Britain?

DD aged 20, on seeing Herdwick sheep for the first time: "are those cows or wolves?".

I bought DGS a stuffed Herdwick with a name tag saying Wolfie, because it's a parent's lifelong privilege to tease your child mercilessly.

Eminy aren't they some of the British Isles, like the Isle of Man?

Donthug please tell me she didn't strike it! 🚒

My ds, who is usually quite intelligent said “I wonder what my doppelgänger looks like”. I just stared at him until he realised what he’d just said...

😂

My 10 yo DD was annoyed with me for giving her 2 'brown' slices out of the Kingsmill 50/50 loaf of bread. She was adamant that the last time I bought it, half the slices were brown and the other half were white.

😂

The British Isles is a geographical term to cover Great Britain, Ireland, Man and the little islands around. I hear in Ireland the same islands get other names like the North Atlantic Archipelago?
The Channel Islands are off the coast of France so aren't British Isles, but are Crown Dependencies belonging to the Queen, not part of the UK. As opposed to Gibraltar which is a British Overseas Territory which is also part of the EU but overseen by the UK...
My first lesson in law for government was "first question: where does this cover?"

@deathraystare
Cyprus, Greece??!!
Appropriate for this thread 😂😂

Talking about dinosaurs with a Year 11 class. One girl, deadly serious, said that they’re not extinct, she’d seen one in a zoo. A rhino-saurus.

Students in colleagues class
"When I have more money I want to buy a 4 wheel drive"
"but, don't all cars have 4 wheels?"

Laughed for ages!!!!!

Ds (15) asked me if we could fast forward the television once, it was live fucking football

Almost every football match I've ever watched makes me feel like that.

DH was in a theatre group doing The Importance of Being Earnest
They sent someone out to get the muffins for them to eat for the scene where they're having toasted muffins.
They came back with chocolate muffin cakes.

Someone at work asked me if I thought dragons had ever really existed.

One of the kids I work with asked me if I used to have to grow my own food when I was a child.
I said ‘no I just went to the shops’
I think she thinks I grew up in Roman times.

Got to the checkout and realised I'd forgotten to get an iceberg lettuce. Sent DS1 to grab one - he returned empty handed claiming that they'd 'run out.'

Perfect timing as the lady on the next checkout lifted up 2 iceberg lettuces...When I queried DS, he sheepishly said that he'd been looking for an Arctic lettuce and definitely couldn't find one of them.

He, too, is very bright with zero common sense...