If your house was filthy? And I mean BAD.

[utterfilth]

Name changed for this. I'm so ashamed.

Over the last few years I have had problems with depression and anxiety which have had a terrible impact on my motivation and housekeeping skills. I don't clean or tidy and my house smells.

The wooden floors are dirty, there are cobwebs. Unpacked boxes from a move two years ago. Clutter everywhere. I manage to keep the kitchen clean for the health of my teenage kids.

I am overwhelmed and feel ill at how much I have to do. I can't cope. I can't have anyone visit.

I would never ask a friend to help me - it's that bad. They would be shocked and disgusted at how bad it is.

I know the answer is to start slowly and if I was able to get my head together I would roll my sleeves up. But I just want to get in bed and sleep.

I don't know what I'm asking here for - maybe just a magic motivational kick up the arse?

I'm similar HollowTalk except I sit down to watch a film, remember something that needs doing , get up and do it and miss the film !

@lubeybooby is that unfilth your habitat?

That's why you have to watch something with adverts, @Oddcat!

I'm really glad this thread came up today, i had two really cluttered corners in my living room and this motivated me to clear them out. Still lots of work to be done in my house but at least the living room is nice!

We are in Sussex but I'm sure we could help if you need it .

@utterfilth

Op, I think the problem with cleaning is that we often think it worse than it really is. I was procrastinating yesterday about the housework. When I finally got on with it, it only took a couple of hours to clean our three bedroom semi.

Be kind to yourself. How much time do you have? If you can allocate a set period per day (30 minutes or an hour) then just make a start. In our house, I'd start in the kitchen and wipe over the sink, do the dishes, shovel the rubbish into one corner, wipe over the counters, sweep the floor move onto the next room.... The next day, do the same but maybe wipe over the microwave and the toaster. The next day do the same and maybe wipe over the fridge. The next day do the same and make a start on the pile of crap.

As you do a little bit each day you'll find it gets much easier. Cleaning the bedroom yesterday took me a few minutes as I was pretty much on top of everything and very little needed tidying/putting away. It was an amazing feeling!

Focus on the end result. When you have everything under control you can treat yourself to some new cushions and some nice candles. You might even want to invite some friends over. You can do it. Don't doubt yourself. Anything is possible and every day is a new start....

Another person thanking you for this thread op. It's inspired me to do a job i haven't tackled for ELEVEN years - we had some building work done then and our toilet got revolting with a dark dirty bottom bit leading to the U bend. It's amazing how you can put these jobs off. I have finally scrubbed the damn thing. Let's hope I manage to do it again before 2029

I’ve spent the entire day cleaning the house. It’s been so so hot here that I have had to keep stopping but thanks to the great weather, I have managed to wash many loads of washing and have actually put them away.
It’s meant that I didn’t end up going to the pub with DH to watch the football but I have achieved so much that it was worth it.
Now I’m off to update the clutter count 😀

Good luck utter, you can do this, bit by bit. I cleared out my parents house, on my own, and it was crammed full of stuff, my dm has been a hoarder for years. If I can do it, and I like to hang on to stuff too, then you can do it, honestly.
Tackling each room, one by one, loud music and having a break every 2hrs, and you will feel lighter and proud of how far you have come. Be kind to yourself

I haven't RTFT (sorry!) but there's a thread in Classics that might inspire. You're not alone

Today I Am Packing A Bag And Leavingwww.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_classics/1635701-Today-I-Am-Packing-A-Bag-And-Leaving

Definutely don’t beat yourself up about it, sounds like you’ve had a really tough time love...

I hit a wall with my house recently and joined the declutterers thread in Housekeeping. I learned that doing one little task at a time soon adds up.

Could you grab a carrier bag and fill it with stuff you don’t need? A quick little job and I bet you’ll be surprised at how good you feel..

And treat yourself to a cleaner you’ll love the results and deserve the help then can start fresh keeping on top of it...

Thanks for this thread OP and all who have posted on it. I've so far cleared a small space (dumping ground) in the hall way and tackled some papers that have been sitting since last year. I'm going by the date on them. After dinner I will be doing a little more hopefully. Tomorrow is a full on day of cleaning the bigger areas.

Well done annan. That deserves a or at least a

Another one thanking you for this thread. I’ve had a tough beginning to the year and things have got out of shape. Thanks to your thread I’ve made a start, a very small start but it’s a start.

I find that I'm easily distracted
@Oddcat - that's when using a timer is brilliant. If you have ADD/ADHD orjust get really distracted generally, setting it for no more than 5 minutes helps. I used ot need it just to empty the dishwasher. i'd start then wander off and completely forget. It's trained me to stay on task.

Or put the kettle on, pick an easy job and race against the kettle to get it done before it boils.

That's a good idea Mina

Download the app (or go on their website) Unfuck Your Habitat. It's brilliant.

I'm in the same situation, unfortunately can't afford a cleaner though. I manage to wash up and tidy my bedroom (because I sleep better in a tidy environment) but the rest is a mess, dirty, dusty, clutteted ... I don't know where to start

Dear OP, sorry for your plight
you said that your house doesn't smell the best, and that your boys do invite friends in sometimes.
I believe that other kids will judge harder on smell than clutter. I definitely agree that you need to work on decluttering as others have said but it sounds like you might have more immediate jobs to do. I am on the decluttering thread for putting out one thing or one bag a day, but I know it's a long, long, long process. I have way too much crap at home myself.
If you can, I think you should make your house feel/smell a bit fresher, as you'll all then feel less embarrassed. In our society I think untidy is judged differently to even a little bit pongy. If you can, of course . I can imagine kids saying, "Shit, there's a lot of stuff in their house!" and "Their house smells horrible", and I think the second one would be worse for your boys to hear.
So, I recommend opening the windows, finding the source of any smells (plates, pizza boxes, mouldy cups, boys' piddle on the floor around the loo, dirty kitchen bin, etc) and fixing those. Maybe the living room carpet might need a freshener powder or bicarb and vacuum. Spray some Febreeze on the curtains and sofas. You and the boys could do this in an hour, or even you yourself could.
Good luck, OP.

How are you this morning op?

It'smega I would start with the bathroom and agree with others that actually throwing stuff away is really important. If you had a bathroom that worked in that it smelled fresh, where the water does drain away from the basin and bath, and wasn't cluttered with stuff that you might use and where you could find everything in the cupboard, that's another whole area of life that feels a bit better. I definitely feel better today having cleaned the bathroom yesterday even though there are still piles of stuff everywhere.

Bin bag every day just keep going. Start with bathrooms and kitchen. Just be ruthless. Mine runs close to the edge of out of control sometimes - I have a husband unable to understand tidy is as tidy does and a daughter runs a close second. Me am a neat freak and suffer when things are not where they should be but have learnt to accept I can't do it for three so allow some chaos and then every so often we blitz. But its just too hot at the moment to worry too much so go with the bag and getting rid of stuff

Meant to say yesterday op that one really good tip from Flylady (although it seems counter-intuitive when everything is a mess and needs attention all at once) is to slow down and just focus on the task in hand. Surprisingly, t really works! Just work through one small do-able task steadily, giving it full focus, then take a break. This will give you the energy and motivation to go on to the next small task and so on, without burning out.

annandale I live in a tiny damp rented house and the bathroom smells most of the time, although better at the moment as the windows open all the time. There's probably a drain problem and Ive a landlord who doesn't really care. It's been looked at and differently nothings wrong. I wipe over with antibac wipes as often as I remember and thankfully its really tiny but the shower is awful.. mouldy sealant and limescale everywhere. The toilet seat is broken and I can't afford or fit a new one.

@Itsmeaga1n have you tried the cotton wool soaked in bleach method on the sealant. You leave it overnight and it takes off any mould.