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You know you're Scottish when........................................

308 replies

weepootleflump · 18/01/2007 13:16

1.you kin properly pronounce - McConnochie, Ecclefechan Milngavie, Sauchiehall St, Enoch, Menzies, Auchtermuchty and Aufurfuksake.

  1. .Ye actually like deep fried battered pizza fae the chippie.
  2. ...Ye get four seasons in wan day.
4... Ye canny pass a chip/kebab shop withoot slaverin when yer blootert.
  1. ..Ye kin fall about p_shed withoot spilling yer drink.
  2. ..Ye see people wear shell suits with burberry accessories - pure class!
  3. .....Ye measure distance in minutes.
  4. ..Ye kin understaun Rab C Nesbitt and know characters just like him - in yer ain family.
  5. ...Ye go tae Saltcoats cos ye think it is like gaun tae the ocean.
10. ..Ye kin make hael sentences jist wae sweer wurds. 11. .Ye know whit haggis is made fae and stull like eating it. 12. .Somedy ye know his used a fitba schedule tae plan thur wedding day date. 13.. You've been at a wedding and fitba scores are announced in the Church/Chapel. 14. ..Ye urny surprised tae find curries, pizzas, kebabs, fish n chips,irn-bru, fags and nappies all in the wan shop. 15... Yer holiday home at the seaside has calor gas under it. 16.... A big flash car has a ned at the wheel. 17. ..Ye know irn-bru is a hangover cure. 18. ..Ye learnt tae sweer afore ye learnt tae dae sums. 19. ...Ye actually understand this. 20. Finally, you are 100% Scottish if you have ever said/heard these words...

a) how's it hingin
b) yourgonnaegetyerfikinheidkiktin
c) clatty
d) boggin
e) cludgie
f) p!shed
g) get it up ye
h) wee beasties
i) ar$e bandit
j) amurny
k) away an bile yer heid
l) peely-wally
m) humphey backit
n) numpty-heid
o) baw bag
p) dubble nugget
1.you kin properly pronounce - McConnochie, Ecclefechan Milngavie, Sauchiehall St, Enoch, Menzies, Auchtermuchty and Aufurfuksake.

  1. .Ye actually like deep fried battered pizza fae the chippie.
  1. ...Ye get four seasons in wan day.

4... Ye canny pass a chip/kebab shop withoot slaverin when yer blootert.

  1. ..Ye kin fall about p_shed withoot spilling yer drink.
  1. ..Ye see people wear shell suits with burberry accessories - pure
class!
  1. .....Ye measure distance in minutes.
  1. ..Ye kin understaun Rab C Nesbitt and know characters just like him -
in yer ain family.
  1. ...Ye go tae Saltcoats cos ye think it is like gaun tae the ocean.
  1. ..Ye kin make hael sentences jist wae sweer wurds.

  2. .Ye know whit haggis is made fae and stull like eating it.

  3. .Somedy ye know his used a fitba schedule tae plan thur wedding day date.

13.. You've been at a wedding and fitba scores are announced in the Church/Chapel.

  1. ..Ye urny surprised tae find curries, pizzas, kebabs, fish n chips,irn-bru, fags and nappies all in the wan shop.

15... Yer holiday home at the seaside has calor gas under it.

16.... A big flash car has a ned at the wheel.

  1. ..Ye know irn-bru is a hangover cure.

  2. ..Ye learnt tae sweer afore ye learnt tae dae sums.

  3. ...Ye actually understand this.

  4. Finally, you are 100% Scottish if you have ever said/heard these words...

a) how's it hingin
b) yourgonnaegetyerfikinheidkiktin
c) clatty
d) boggin
e) cludgie
f) p!shed
g) get it up ye
h) wee beasties
i) ar$e bandit
j) amurny
k) away an bile yer heid
l) peely-wally
m) humphey backit
n) numpty-heid
o) baw bag
p) dubble nugget

OP posts:
hotandbothered · 19/01/2007 19:59

The stovies were scrummy thank you and dd ate them all up...

Macdog · 19/01/2007 20:01

Fab!
It's nice tae be nice

hotandbothered · 19/01/2007 20:03

Don't envy you ItsmeMellowma! Then again I had to learn The Tay Bridge Disaster off by heart I can remember the first verse still...

HaggisSupper · 19/01/2007 20:15

PMSL at this thread

I'm a Fifer and have used most of these words. DH's personal favourite expression is bawbag in fact. The best one I ever heard was my gran asking my grandad to pass her dressing down over to her.

'Gies ma goon oot'

My favourite chippy you can tell by my name and it's always 'with everythin on' ie salt, vinigar and brown sauce. Loving it

HaggisSupper · 19/01/2007 20:16

William McGonagle poems are so funny! I have a book of them and it is hilarious.

upwiththebirds · 19/01/2007 20:24

weepootleflump - fantastic! - thank you

sonsieface · 19/01/2007 20:51

new scottish name because it will be Burn's birthday soon

couldn't think of many burns quotes

sonsieface · 19/01/2007 21:07

ach wish I had thought of iloveneeps

Macdog · 19/01/2007 23:26

I've got my birthday on Burns Night
I'll be old. Very old.

sonsieface · 19/01/2007 23:30

macdog you need a name change for the day

not that I can think of any!

will you be having the haggis then?

Macdog · 19/01/2007 23:34

Haggis supper, possibly !!

BBWBabeLisa · 19/01/2007 23:43

DH was meticulously picking crumbs off of something the other day when I told him to "jist dod it!". He almost wet himself - and he's glaswegian same as me.

hotandbothered · 19/01/2007 23:46

Regularly tell dd to 'wheesht' which she now says to me but in a good Surrey accent!

BBWBabeLisa · 19/01/2007 23:48

Any of you read Irvine Welsh's stuff (trainspotting guy)? DH reading Glue ATM. Hard going even for a scot!

suzycreamcheese · 19/01/2007 23:51

sonsieface
burns is one of my fav poets and i know most of to a mouse!
love his stuff...

ItsMeMellowma · 20/01/2007 11:43

I can still remember ds1 poem from last year, it goes like this:

Ma wee rid motor

I ma wee rid motor
a kin gan fir miles
up in doon the country.......

weepootleflump · 20/01/2007 13:41

BBWBabeLisa, I think I've read everything by Irvine Welsh except Glue - is it worth reading? Have to admit I did find it difficult at first as well, though I'm sure it wouldn't have been half as bad if it was written in weegie rather than an east-coaster.
ps. are you forces?

OP posts:
BBWBabeLisa · 20/01/2007 15:04

wee - he's only a few pages into it at the mo so can't say if it's worth a read yet. Plan to give it a go after him.
Yeh we're army - REME in Aldershot at mo. Are you?

saltire · 20/01/2007 15:35

I am thinking of changing my name for Burns night.
I changed it for St Andrews day.

suzycreamcheese · 20/01/2007 15:59

i like trainspotting and some short stories,,,i thought he'd gone off the boil in recent times..irvine welsh..
am sure i recognised people in his novels, lived in edinburgh for over 3 years..

pointydog · 20/01/2007 18:18

he's gone a bit right wing hasn't he. IN RL, don;t know about his books. I've only read Filth

suzycreamcheese · 20/01/2007 20:31

pointy..dont know much about him these days for sure..always felt a bit sorry as i imagine Irvine itself is a bit grim..
if anything like other scottish new towns of that ilk..whats it called..cumbernauld / east kilbride /
the jesusandmarychain were the best thing ever to come out of east kilbride i loved them..these places are just so grim...

weepootleflump · 20/01/2007 20:40

suzy you are not wrong about Irvine being grim - ended up at a party there donkey's years ago and man it was scary

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 20/01/2007 20:41

He's a freak.

He lives in Ireland, anyhoo.

weepootleflump · 20/01/2007 20:42

We're Sigs BBW, dh used to be at Aldershot but we lived in London

OP posts: