debt and thoughts of suicide

[joee123]

I am a single mum with a ten year old.i am drowning in debt and santander are taking me to court on the 5th november for repossession.the council and debts agencies are pushingme from pillar to post.my daughter goes away on sunday for 1 week.i feel quite calm now as im planning to take my life.i know she will be looked after.i dont even know why im here.im jyst desperate i suppose

Just reread some of the above.seriously when you have a plan in mind it really is easier to talk to or tell someone who doesnt know you. Loads of people encouraged contacting the gp or the samaritans.thank you again xxx

Glad you have had a better day today
and great that people are helping you,even your boss!

Hope this thread is helping others in some way.

You're fine Joee, I shouldn't think too much on it.
Glad you had a good day.

Boss has been great.it was her who originally approached the local council where we work last week.originally though as we live just over the border in another county they said they couldnt help.if i get through this i might be able to pass on my experience to help someone else.but worried if people are rhinking im not genuine.seriously i havent asked fir anything, but got loads of support and ideas xxx

Boss had me to tea tonight! Shes a great cook too ! :-)

I think everyone knows you haven't asked for anything. As I said, someone upthread made an offer of accommodation and MN generally advise caution against reaching out in person so to speak.
Again, I don't think anyone's doubting you.

Thanks shotgun makes me feel better.when i mentioned 'pay it forward' it wasnt about money.like the film i just think that acts of kindness you do, come back to you in some way.the kindness and support ive found here just reinforce my belief in people and 'pay it forward' xxx

Just read through your thread and it's good to hear your mood seems to have changed?
I was given that dvd, Pay it forward, to watch but haven't got round to it yet. I knew what you meant though as have seen clips of it. You just meant what goes round comes round, and if someone does you good do someone else good and so on. At least I think that was it?

Keep strong and best of luck to your and dd.

Thankyou curiousmama.yeah thats it! Thursday was a real low point after feeling batted between two councils, one if which not very helpful.i love my girl dearly, she is my blessing, but things were looking so awful and hopeless i had given up and just couldnt see the energy to get through this any longer.the support on here helped me pick myself up and fight again.i know its one day at a time, but i am almost starting to think with the right help, we may still lose ownership of our home but we might be able to stay here in a more affordable way. Then i can start to sort out the debts.thankyou thankyou xxx

Well to be honest she'd rather live in a caravan than have no mum. But I can imagine it's sometimes difficult to see straight when you feel everything's crashing down on you. In fact I know it is. Accept all the help out there and don't let the bastards win!

I know i know.i have cried in front of her over it, which hurts me even more.she told me shed rather be on the pavement with me rather than anywhere else.because of my work i suppose she knows what its like to be ' on the outside' i am massively proud of her heart and humour ' xxx

Joee, you sound so much more positive, you should be so proud of yourself. It sounds really encouraging about the CAB mortgage rescue too.

FWIW based on what you have said on your thread, i for one will never use santander bank!! I am looking for a new current account so up their bums eh!

Your DD sounds amazing, i think that is because she has an amazing mum!

Chin up chick x thinking of you and glad you have some Rl support xxxxxxxxx

Bless u lucyellenmum.yes she s a fab kid.i think things turned on friday when i got he council where we live to agree to mortgage resq. I got them to put it in writing too.santander still say no, but the CAB expert came back to me today after being told he couldnt help last week- as we were in a different county- and is onboard and confidently taking on santander.i am almost hopeful.i know its still a fight.wuthout MN ers i wouldnt have got up and fought back on friday.thankyou thankyou xxx

Yeah and up your bums santander!! Bastards

Lucyellenmum just a thought.i was with alliance n leicester for the mortgage till they were taken over by santander :-( i bank with co op smile cos of their decent ethical policy, ive been very happy with them and would recommend them xxx

I've cried in front of dss when I left their dad. Ranting on about what a shit mum I was. I'm not and they adore me but we all have meltdowns x

Xxx- what we like!

I have PM'd you. Please seek some help for depression from the GP.

I won't post what I have sent you on the thread, but I urge you to read my PM, and see the aftermath of suicide of a parent (especially a Lone Parent) from the perspective of the 10yo child left behind.

And having now finished reading the thread, I'm glad you are feeling more positive and making done headway with things.

But if you feel yourself slipping back into those thoughts, PLEASE seek help sooner rather than later.

As your DD has told you, she doesn't care if she is homeless as you will be there with her.

That matters so much more.

I look at my DC's, and sometimes it sends me into floods of tears when I think what a wonderful Granddad my Dad would have made, and how sad it was that he never hot to meet any of them.

He would be so proud of them all.

I miss him. Every day. And he committed suicide 21 years, 3 months and 26 days ago. It doesn't go away.

Just remember that it takes a stronger person to face up to these shitty situations that life throws at us, and that you ARE string enough! (((Hugs)))

String enough = strong enough. Stupid Autocorrect.

Bless u couthy i have messaged you.one of my closest friends works for winstons wish- brilliant organisation for bereathed young people up to 18. Sadly she was telling me they get many more referrals for murder manslaughtr and suicide :-( anyway, promise that I am beginnung to see some light X

Mixed day today but im fighting on.friends coming round for moral support.on the positive looks like the cab/mortgage rescue/council expert is coming to court with ne! Whoooo! The bug guns r on my side!! Xxx

Whoooo!

That's brilliant news. Yay!