debt and thoughts of suicide

[joee123]

I am a single mum with a ten year old.i am drowning in debt and santander are taking me to court on the 5th november for repossession.the council and debts agencies are pushingme from pillar to post.my daughter goes away on sunday for 1 week.i feel quite calm now as im planning to take my life.i know she will be looked after.i dont even know why im here.im jyst desperate i suppose

Glad you had a good night and that you've got support today.
You're doing a fab job of it all x

keep it up joee! I was just coming on to post to say that you could use this week without your DD to get all your paperwork together and take some advice over what to say etc.It looks like you've beaten me too it. Again, get in touch with the national debt line, they are fantastic and they will advise re the court etc. Have Cscs not done this already? Then once you have done the shitty bit, do something nice for YOU. What would you like to do?

Thank you both.Kept busy all day now just sitting chatting to the rabbit and watching Downton.Quite calm but still angry with Santander.Did my response to court.The council had done it, but not very well.Happier with it now.Tablets are in the shed as promised.Sent my girl off with huge smiles and loads of love to keep her going.Feeling right now, i ll just go one day at a time. Thank you thankyou again xxx

Lucyellenmum, If i didnt have the other worries Id g0 away for a few days !! xxx

One day at a time is good.
You are doing well. x

Joee123, just wanted to pop on to say hi. Keep yourself busy this week, try and spend some time with friends. Keep us posted with how things are going. Sorry I can't give any advice. But we are all rooting for you.

Night night xx

P.s. Your rabbit sounds fab.

Morning everyone.just me n the rabbit this am.off to work with a streaming cold.not surprising. Just going a day at a time and think im gonna be kept very busy.thankyou again for all the support it really has helped- keep it coming! Xxx

Well done Joee - keep going!
Can you grab some bits during lunch to pamper yourself with tonight?
How about a luxurious bath with candles and eucalyptus oils when you get in tonight - the steam will be good for your cold.

And/or a hot toddy, snuggled up with a good book:

Hot tea
1 Tbsp honey
1 tsp lemon juice
Grated cinnamon
Ground cloves
Grated nutmeg
Lemon wedge for garnish

I think Lucyellensmum is absolutely right about using some of this time just for you. Looking after YOU is just as important as dealing with the house stuff.

Hi all,

We have had a few reports about this thread over the weekend.

As far as we can see, the OP is genuine and we wish her all of the best in this very difficult situation.

We just want to remind everyone to be aware that not everyone on t'internet is who they say they are, and that, although we're awed daily by the astonishing support our members give each other through life's trickier twists and turns, we'd always caution anyone never to give more of themselves to another poster, emotionally or financially, than they can afford to spare.

Many thanks to those who reported this thread to us.

Thanks Rebecca - that's an important message. For posters of support and to Joee.

Joee - it's a reminder to you as well that RL support is important too. Whilst it is often great, you can never guarantee who is going to be around on MN when you need it. I for one would feel a lot happier knowing you were accessing some kind of counselling support through this really hard time.

Which I think you know and will do when necessary.

Accessing help is not a sign of weakness, it's a sign of having been too strong for too long.

I swear you have missed a vital ingredient out of that hot toddy there defragged But if you are anything like me joee, probably best, alcohol and me is BAD when i am stressed.

Oh have I?

I believe her so am more than happy to keep talking.

op, you might want to email MNHQ to reassure them.

I wouldnt mind knowing why some people are suspicious.
I dont know whether joee123 would like to know as well?

Yes, there's nothing I can see other than a totally geniune person who is understandably struggling with a heap of shit.

I would hazard a guess most people who have reported are just alarmed and don't know what to do for the best. Suicide is a scary topic for many. But open and honest talk is the best way and Joee strikes me like she is doing all the right things.

My guess is that the few that reposrted,which well may be eg 2 or 3, think she isnt genuine.
I do,and MN says that as far as they can see,they think so too.
That is plenty good enough for me.

Which is why I will always recommend the Samaritans or other mental health lines. MN can be a great place for advice and support, but tis a mixed bag.

If you want to be sure of being heard (rather than just told not to do something) people on phonelines like the Samaritans won't be scared to talk about the real issues.

The reporting could be because a poster offered to let the OP stay at her house.

That's very true shotgun. And very wise from MNHQ to raise caution on all sides.

Having just re-read my last posts, I'd like to clarify I'm not saying people here are not helping or scared to help. It's just sometimes throwing practical solutions to a person isn't always the best thing at the time when suicide is an option.

Quite often a person with thoughts of suicide needs to talk about just that - and they need to talk to someone who is prepared and able to talk about suicide. Sometimes it's better to talk to someone who is trained to do just that.

Joee - hope you're doing ok and not too put off posting. The last thing anyone needs in their hour of need is someone shouting troll. Shotgun's explanation seems the most likely to me.

Being naive,and assuming caution took place, what is wrong with that.
I assume the same thing goes on with pming sometimes.

Just in.Not sure what ive done ir if i ve offended someone.sorry if i have :-( i turned to mumsnet in desperation and you ve all really helped.i havent pm anyone or asked anyone for anything.i have friends and supportive work colleagues- i just found it easier to blurt out how i was feeling here.MN havent contacted me, or asked me to stop posting so i assume im still okay. If anyone doesnt believe me I would gladly post my court and santander stuff. Anyway it was a good day so far. The mortgage rescue expert at the CAB has come back to me today. With my boss` help we have scanned and emailed all my paperwork and Cccs stuff and he has put in a formal request_ and is trying to get the court case adjourned.He seems quite confident. Santander just need to agree.Last week Because i live in one county and live in another~ i was just being pushed between the 2 councils. Things are definitely looking better today akthough i know i still have to fight. Maybe im in troubke because i mentioned santander? Anyway thankyou everyone fir the support and posts xxx

That was supposed to read i live in one county and work across another !!

"assuming caution took place" - I think that's the point, it's a reminder for everyone to exercise caution.

x post!