The 1 year anniversary thread of the UMN: we're not fussed about Tinkers or Tailors but we do like Soldiers and Spies

[PassTheTwiglets]

Ta-da!

Come on then Lady D, wallop the Champagne over our bow :)

Does he do the old parlez-vous, I wonder?

He only learnt Russian phonetically didn't he but imagine him whispering sweet nothings into your twiglet ear in French!

Dark side - what light side I'd I've to ask?!

Right off out to school PTA AGM then straight onto book club so if I appear in here before 10pm be suspicious that it's the Colonel masquerading as me!!!

Have lovely evenings.
xxx

We really need some sort of codeword, RP, so we can be sure it's you. Very Spooks eh?

Redflash Alpha Team, incoming codeword protocol to be used in emergency situations. Eyes only. Although what else would you be reading this with? Do not, I repeat, do not attempt to read with your nose.

Twigs: nibble
Spiro: footwell
Massive: stomp
Maud: cravat
LadyD: kecks
Small: curtains

Stay safe people. Trust no-one. Especially her.

Nah, that doesn't work, either.

ROFL @ the codewords, all so very appropriate. Twigs, you are a genius

Evening all. Have we seen this ?

::slumps on Aubusson::

I forgot yesterday hen we were doing our Oscar-type speeches of thanks, I'd my manicurist and my probation officer to thank Massive for introducing me to Polish cordial, which represented something of a ::cough:: turning point in my relationship with Mr Thornton.

Oh, had meant to say too that that NZ blog was very endearing and in marked and welcome contrast to those harpies who would no doubt have hurled themselves naked onto the table, sending the crockery flying.

Ey up what's my codeword!!?!

::waves from Camp 3 of Ironing Mountain::

Nearly at the summit, will be in to join you soon.....

Don't know what your codeword is, RP. which is a wee bit frustrating because your having one was the whole point of the exercise

What is this ironing of which you speak, LadyD? Anything to do with metal, big swords and the like?

In fact, you weren't supposed to be back before 10pm so you are probably the Colonel.

Do not, I repeat, do not attempt to read with your nose.

ROFL!

I have just descended my ironing mountain and am off for something hot & steamy (aka coffee & a bath, sadly).

BBL!

C'mon Massive, 'fess up...

::stands proudly on summit::

I've done it! I've conquered the ironing mountain (until today's and tomorrow's loads land, anyway )

Massive, it involves metal but no sharp points, fortunately. It is actually a cunning ruse to be able to watch extRA resources without raising suspicion. Tonight's climb was accompanied by some dulcet, velvety tones explaining about the tigers in the Himalayas. NarRAtions are most excellent as I don't burn myself due to excessive screen gazing or drifting off into reveries about Gizzy.

For reference, N&S makes for a slow climb as MrT takes up a lot of screen time. RH is quicker because you can get a good pace up while the PLFW is doing his thang. Ditto VoD. I choose according to whether I'm up for a sprint or a dawdle.

::shuffles awkwardly and doesn't make eye contact with Spiro::

I have it on fairly good authority that that one is not, in fact, Massive's.

Sounds much more fun than when I used to do any, LadyD. How do you manage to commandeer the telly and DV player.?

OMG Spiro, PMSL. You will never believe me I know, but it honestly and truly wasn't me.

I just know you will all think it was. Oh, the shame!

2 TVs and 2 DVD players . I decamp to the playroom while LordD/MiniDs have the sitting room.

I know that one wasn't you, btw.....

I'm in the bath which is next to dd's room and I laughed so loud when that confession appeared I thought she was going to wake up!

LadyD, you didn't !

I am sniggering like a fool but can't tell LordD why .

::stands proud::

I did, mainly because a) I knew you'd all blame Massive and b) I thought it would make you laugh and c) it's true.

It seems pretty popular anyway.

::Maud's lawyer arrives on the scene::

I have come to read LadyDamerel her rights and warn her that anything she says may be taken down and used in evidence.

::pen poised::

What did you say, LadyDamerel? Gisborne's leather trousers?

::Sends for Sigmund::

Maud's lawyers broke Mumsnet!

Ladies, is Amazon down, too? it seemed to be for me.

In no way did I break Mumsnet. If you repeat that calumny I will have no choice but to (ahem) sue, grabbit and run.

Amazon.co.uk is alright, Massive. I selflessly went through the whole ordering process to check for you and can confirm that it is fully operational.