The Lucas North Portakabin at the University of Milton-Northern.

[SupermassiveLBD]

WARNING

Don't forget your hard hat, hi-viz gear and parachute. We lost a careless vice-principal this way only last year.

Loving 'most active':

We are all jolly well going to smack...

Enid Blyton

ROFL!

Oh, Vampy, poor you, it's incredibly difficult trying to bring up a family like this.

If you want, you can always ask MN to remove your post, if you feel uncomfortable about it, eventually. Not that I'm suggesting you need to.

Vampy, I'm on my phone and can't read your message very well so i'll have a look later when I get the laptop back.

I'd noticed we hadn't had a mention on the quiche thread and wasn't sure whether we just slip under most people's radar or if we're considered to be such loons we scare other folk away ;)

Maybe we're far too high class and intellectual to be thought of as a quiche, though, LadyD.

I think most people moaning about a quiche are probably in a quiche themselves though? And maybe as they realise we are an all inclusive quiche who as maid said kidnap encourage people to join. Tis not our fault they see sense and escape while they can don't stay and chat too long!

Vamps that sounds awful! You poor thing, it must be very hard for both of you but I do agree that The Colonel needs to make some compromises with regard to family time. You need to have a good chat about it and explain how unhappy it's making you.

ROFL @ see sense and escape while they can

I think most people moaning about a quiche are probably in a quiche themselves though?

Or just a teeny bit , perhaps?

Vampy - you are doing something many women couldn't even contemplate doing so all credit to you. Is the Colonel usually home on a Saturday? Could he cut it a bit shorter (I'm guessing the answer to that will be a 'no' if it's anything like Mr Spiro's cricket commitments ), or go alternate weeks. Perhaps he could still go but on the understanding that if you or the kids have had a particularly busy/tough week he'll give it a miss.

I can sympathise to a degree as Mr Spiro's previous job involved 7am - 7.30pm 4 days on/4 off (not including travelling time) - plus he did sports coaching 3 afternoons a week and 3 late evenings (10pm finishes) either incorporated into his working day or in addition to. By the time we added on a day a week playing cricket and an evening or two out with his mates I was lucky to see him 2 evenings a week. But we didn't have to cope with all the moving and other stresses that comes with your situation so it was nowhere near as hard (and as you know I am a big fan of my own space!)

I would just mention to him though (if you need to take the thumbscrews approach) that it will affect the kids to some extent - in the sense that they will become used to it. Mr Spiro changed job 3 years ago but Miss S still doesn't like him putting her to bed - simply because he just wasn't there to do it for so long.

Thanks ladies!! To be honest I quite like my own space too but it is the kids I worry about. They already think it's less fun when he's around as he's so grumpy at the moment!

But I definitely would find it easier if I felt happy settled where we live but even after nearly 6 months I still don't! Probably will love it by the time we move again in 18months.

Ah well as a wise woman just said to me. I'm going to focus on the good bits and know that this will pass until the next stressful move and job!

Get yourself over to Twitter Vampy - I've just been flirting with Lucas North whilst cooking the dinner.

Thanks massive! Tis lovely that mustn't think about the fact that he unfortunately has a similar relationship with his Lexi as the Colonel does with our children!

Spiro - I can't see what you're saying to him!

Colonel came home at 7 as he heard from my voice that something was up when I rang and told him spinning was off this evening so he didn't need to rush home! He'a upstairs reading with DD. sorry about my outburst earlier. Think it all needed to come to a head - I'll try and talk to him later if he's not too tired!

Fingers crossed for you then, Vampy

Hi all - quick check in as I am off out - yes I am guilty of spending many evenings out and about whilst hubby babysits and I get complaints about it. But the ball has been on the other foot in times past.

I may be about to be really annoying for him though as I am hoping to do some background acting work in a professionally produced play!!!

Nothing definite yet but it involves multiple evening performances and also weekends - so I've had to ask very nicely.

Vampy, I do feel for you. You're basically single parenting, aren't you? :( Personally I would find his Saturdays out absolutely not on. For your sake as well as for the kids. No way should you have to parent by yourself all week long and then do it all on the weekend too. It is obviously hard for him when he works long hours and he needs some downtime too but not that bloomin' much :)

Oooh Spiro, I haven't a good twirt with a PSM for ages - will check it out now :o

Vampy - I think I can glean what your missing post was about. As others have already said, you need to have a calm and frank chat with the Colonel and point out to him that the choices he makes about how he spends his free time have knock-on effects for you and the cadets. I know it sounds harsh, but it seems to me that the fact that he has no choice about being an absentee dad and husband when he's deployed means he has to make more of an effort to be hands-on and just to be there when he's not.

You're twirting again with Pretend Lucas, you say?

Dear, dear MrT. How I have missed his face-palms. He seemed to lose interest after the mammoth Plato session - has he only just recovered?

Vampy, I think Maud speaks a lot of sense. I couldn't read all of it earlier because I had to keep scrolling from side to side on my phone screen but from what I read I do feel you need to have a calm, rational talk with the Colonel.

Hi Lady V, the acting sounds fascinating can you tell us more?

Au contraire, LadyD.

Mr Thornton had hopes that we were going to maintain an elevated intellectual and cultural tone in here (and so he need not avert his eyes) but recently there have been some, ahem, episodes that a gentleman of Mr Thornton's probity and moral rectitude would inevitably find shocking. The Plato marathon has nothing to do with that - I have it on good authority that he found that most energising and intellectually refreshing.

It should be noted that the occasions upon which we have behaved in a manner unbecoming to our scholarly status have been those from which you yourself have been absent, Maud.

If you will insist on cavorting with Mr Higgins et al at the thee-ay-tar then a decline in moral standards within the Academy must be expected.

But, my dear LadyD, true goodness comes from within. If Academicians do not have an innate sense of decorum and moral standards then there is not much I can do to impose one, especially as I am so often engaged in earnest philosophical debate with Mr Thornton or being entertained by Mr Higgins at the thee-ay-ter.

You are right as ever Maud! Yes I was bemoaning in a lengthy and slightly too overt way that I was concerned of outing me and the colonel! But he works too hard, we barely see him, we have barely seen him since early 2009 through no fault of his own but job/career based!

I had a good cry earlier cos someone was nice to me!! and feel much more relaxed. On the whole he is brilliant. He came home at 7 this evening, did DD's reading, washed up and did all the ironing which I was going to do while watching SB again tomorrow but I thought better of stopping him!! It is hard for both of us. I have one friend who tells her DH that his children are his hobby and another who feels they need down time and she's basically a rugby widow during that season! Need some kind of compromise - alternate weekends would be good. But at the moment we're away a lot at weekends so it's tricky!

Ah well you don't want to know all this!!

Back to business - I had Vampboy dancing to "I'm sexy and I know it" this morning. Was very funny but all I could picture was the YouTube accompaniment!

Sadly, I find that my own innate sense of decorum and morality is seriously compromised by my proximity to dear Gizzy. .

What LadyD says. Although I do recognise i must shoulder my own share of the blame