I've been a prostitute on and off since I was a young adult. AMA.

[IAMAthroway]

Just that, really. I am drunk and bored, and I've noticed in the past on MN, many sweeping statements made about sex workers that I don't always agree with (i.e we are all brainwashed into thinking we are happy with our career choice, but really we are miserable)

For background, I started when I was 19, maybe late 18. I got into it because I was lapdancing and noticed those who offered "extras" after hours made 3x what I did. I was young and stupid, and sex just felt like sex to me, so it was quick, easy money. I left when I was 23/24 and met DH.

I got back into it when I was in my early 30s and left DH with nothing to my name, but left again when DH and I agreed to a suitable child maintenance arrangement, and I could afford to live.

I went back into it 2/3 months ago when possible redundancies were announced at my work, and I realised benefits covered only around 2/3 of my basic outgoings. I am in my early 40s with two adult children who still rely on me. DS is in uni, and DD has just started an NMW job; both still live with me.

You're reading the thread.

There’s a lot of psycho men parading themselves as average, I can think of five of the top of my head.

The point was about coercion, not risk.

The men are "sweet" - really?
You're degree educated, and even in the small hours, and drunk, you are very cogent and sound intelligent. I am also wondering why you're not pursuing a career now that your children are adults.

You make less than £100 for having sex with someone you dont know!!! That isn't much considering. Surely there's got to be a better, safer, less damaging way for you to earn money.

So you’d be fine with your boss adding weekly blowjob onto your responsibilities?

So you have a regular career ie beautician and are capable of supporting yourself without prostitution.

Do your children know, how do they feel about it if they do? How do you think they would feel about it if they don't? Are you looking for some kind of validation from this thread?

Yes, it's not exactly a high income, especially for something so risky.
Also, doing it from home when two adult children live there?

What was your degree subject?

I can't say I'm surprised at all the vitriol over this.

op whilst I don't admire your choices I do admire and respect your CHOICE to do with YOUR body what you wish, and to use your time to speak to us about those choices.

those of you who are frothing at this really should stop and as mumsnet likes to say - get a grip. maybe also remember 'who without sin may cast the first stone' or however it's said

I do not do anything in my job that I don’t want to do or that I’m even 50-50 on
That’s one of the benefits of having a degree building a career and giving oneself choice.

As I mentioned, I had a friend who was an escort and it was pure laziness. She had a first class on his degree from a crappy university but it was still a degree and she could’ve gone on and done very well for herself with it. People she went to university with started on 40,000 a year and we’re up to 100 within five years. They had the same number of children as she did and the same 24 hours in the day.
But she was Bone idol and a professional victim.

How do you discuss what’s going to happen during the meet up? Is it awkward when they put the money down? What happens at the end of their allotted time? Eg, if you’re in the middle of oral sex and he hasn’t climaxed do you just stop?

Sorry for so many questions.

Do they pay upfront? Is your pricing system clear, or do the customers like to negotiate?

?

Why is it judgemental? What about it is untrue?

(Incidentally, having been coerced into prostitution as an underage teenager, I'm familiar with the industry.)

If we’re all slaves already and there is no difference in getting paid to sit at a computer all day or suck a stranger’s cock, what skin would it be off your nose to have it added to you responsibilities at work?
Or would you feel coerced into it?

I think it's great OP has written this because although many people want to try say its coercion and abuse if the woman is 18, it clearly proves that many young women are autonomous in their decision to do that sort of work and are doing so for financial gain. For her to still do that work happily in her 40s it's even more clear that she is content with her 'job'. Some women - like some men, see sex as transactional. Some women pretend to like/love men for years, sleeping with them regularly (while secretly finding them repulsive) and calling it marriage. Those women also do it for financial security and the freedom of not having to work a proper job. Really women in those kinds of marriages are just as much a prostitute as OP. Except OP is choosing when to sleep with these men (probably not having to wake up to them) and not pretending to love them. I personally wouldn't do either but I'm happily long term celibate so I'm right at the other extreme end of the spectrum. Who are we to judge.

Do what you want to do. Supply and demand as long as your safe x

Looks like the judgemental posters have driven the OP away. What a pity, she put up a brave AMA but people wanted to turn it into their own soapbox. Well done.

@IAMAthroway good luck to you. It's the oldest profession in the world. Women will always offer sex for money, men will always buy it. I think it should be legalised.

How many women pro “sex work” would support their husband seeking these professional services?
Or do you suddenly understand the personal harm when it comes closer to affecting you?

@IAMAthroway - i just wanted to say that i have friends who have worked in the sex industry through choice so i do see it can be a positive choice. They have tended to offer particular services - a couple of them have worked as dominatrices and one specialises in working with physically disabled men to help them (re)discover their sexuality and gain sexual confidence for pleasing partners.

Thank you very much for posting. So much in life is grey and i think that applies to sex work as well (though exploitation and coercion are always wrong - nothing grey about that).

"Women will always offer sex for money, men will always buy it. I think it should be legalised."

Sex for money is already legal in the UK.

Related activities such as Pimping. running brothers, kerb crawling are illegal.

Some women - like some men, see sex as transactional. Some women pretend to like/love men for years, sleeping with them regularly (while secretly finding them repulsive) and calling it marriage. Those women also do it for financial security and the freedom of not having to work a proper job. Really women in those kinds of marriages are just as much a prostitute as OP. Except OP is choosing when to sleep with these men (probably not having to wake up to them) and not pretending to love them.

Reading this thread the term "maintainance sex" has popped into my head more than once.

It reads like a scene from pretty woman
And we all know how badly that aged