My boys go to a prestigious boarding school. Ask me anything !

[tummyduck]

Ask me anything about my boys who board at an all boys’ school ! Any disrespectful questions will be ignored

I am not arguing that point.

My point is that the OP implied that she paid full fees and said that the tax payer didnt subsidise her. Which is incorrect. The military scheme which subsidises her kids education is paid for by the tax payer. So to suggest that she has no benefit at all from the tax payer is in fact, a lie. Not a misunderstanding, but a downright lie.

I dont care where she sends her kids, I dont care how she pays for it, but I do care when someone utterly misrepresents to the point of sheer fakery.

You sound like a lovely mum!
yes I do miss that but it is not all the time and it is normal for me now

You think people are envious? I really really don't think most people are envious that she has her children in boarding school.

Where have I said I fund my children’s education myself?

Oi you gerroff my thread !

So on Saturday daytime you can’t see them because they’re boarding that night?

And then you don’t actually see them for the full day on Sunday as they are doing something else for part of the day?

Quite!
Apparently, boarding schools are horrendous for every single person. Limited thinking much!

Well done OP, I went to boarding school and loved it. Astonishingly for some, I also love and respect my parents.

My Dsis didn't enjoy it, did one term and changed to being a day scholar whilst the rest of us four enjoyed it.

Each child is different.

Just wow.

everything that is wrong with this culture in one throw away line. My precious rich kids can’t be mixing with the likes of you awful ruffians in your scary inner city schools

The link with the girl's school is unlikely to help much, I have experience with these types of school links.

How often do YOU speak with your boys about seeing the world from a woman's perspective because both my girls have experienced an absolute gap from elite private school (all boys) school's including the not alpha male type school.

Please could you tell me how often you and your husband talk to your boys about a women's perspective.

Rape, wolf whistling, rating, nudes, assault, pay gap, women not being listened to in work meetings because they are female, post natal career breaks and the negative effect on long term paths and pensions etc., the fact that even full time working women take on the majority of the family load, how women and girl's have to change their behaviour to accommodate male behaviour, the fact 1 in 4 girls will be raped by a man in their lifetime and that rape jokes are not funny etc etc etc...

These should be daily/weekly/monthly conversations that your boys engage in not workshops.

How do you know these conversations are taking place naturally and regularly not just the odd workshop!

Sorry just catching up!

sundays we see them from
1030 until 7

they just hang around downstairs with us, we limit screen time, they are knackered, have lunch, cuddle and a bit a chat

food - varied. Not awful. Could be better

sleep dorms of 6 in first year
that gets smaller
by sixth form you have your own room

laundry everything has to be labelled. All gets done on one mass haul!

days very structured - afterschool clubs compulsory for first 2 years
homework for 1-2 hours a day

Do you care that the school
is “prestigious “?

Also they don’t phone me every day- they are too busy ! They get their phones for an hour in the evening but they are often playing footie or squash or whatever with their mates

It doesn't matter if they are happy or not. You made the decision to send them away at 11 because you preferred spending time with your dh overseas rather than being a mother to your children. They probably went into survival mode of masking and suppressing their feelings in order to survive being abandoned. You can say they are happy but you're not even with them most of the time so you have no idea. Why did you have children in the first place? And how do you justify travelling with your DH when you had every opportunity to stay in England spending time with your children? Did you suffer emotional neglect yourself? You do come across as very emotionally detached which might explain why you don't see any problem with not being there for your children. I'm trying not to judge (but it's really hard tbh) because I'm trying to understand your mindset. Nothing in the world could keep me away from my children. Nothing. And DS1 is autistic and very difficult to live with and yet I couldn't just send him or his 12 year old brother away. The 12 year old needs lots of hugs and cuddles after spending a night away on sleepovers. I just can't get my head around this, sorry.

I should have said ´well known ´ . Better adjective. My bad

Where are you getting envy from? Do you think that most people want to send their children to boarding school but finances don't stretch?

Id be amazed if that were the case

This is so, so sad. I honestly cannot fathom how anyone could spend this much time away from their children. My eldest is 12 now and the thought of sending him away is heart breaking.

You’ll probably think I’m being disrespectful but maybe you would consider answering why you had children to see them so little? Do you not miss them terribly?

’I am not trying to judge’ sorry nearly spit out my tea!!!!

my kids aren’t neurodivergent, I might have a different frame of reference if they had additional needs.
i think we probably all carry some baggage from our childhood- but emotional neglect wasn’t one of them- my parents didn’t let me fulfill my dream of being the next Anneka Rice though so maybe it is that?

The link with the girl's school is unlikely to help much, I have experience with these types of school links.

How often do YOU speak with your boys about seeing the world from a woman's perspective because both my girls have experienced an absolute gap from elite private school (all boys) school's including the not alpha male type school.
Please could you tell me how often you and your husband talk to your boys about a women's perspective.

Rape, wolf whistling, rating, nudes, assault, pay gap, women not being listened to in work meetings because they are female, post natal career breaks and the negative effect on long term paths and pensions etc., the fact that even full time working women take on the majority of the family load, how women and girl's have to change their behaviour to accommodate male behaviour, the fact 1 in 4 girls will be raped by a man in their lifetime and that rape jokes are not funny etc etc etc...

These should be daily/weekly/monthly conversations that your boys engage in not workshops.

How do you know these conversations are taking place naturally and regularly not just the odd workshop!

No, I don’t think most people want to send their kids to boarding school. But I think a fair proportion would like to be able to buy a decent private education and it’s the opportunities that OP can afford her kids that breeds the envy.

I don’t view it is sad at all. Not one bit. From my point of view it is (for now) a lot positivity and now we are on summer break- a lot of silliness and joy

Haha. Exactly. I am so happy to have them back after just a night away. My 12 year old spent a week at his cousins with Mil and while he had tons of fun and his gm there to hug him he just stayed glued to me the first day after coming home. Why even bother having kids if you don't want to spend time with them. 🤷‍♀️

Not only that, the OP mentioned her largesse, subbing the poorer kids on assisted places with ‘her’ fees! Lady bountiful with tax payers money. Unbelievable. Laughably privileged, entitled and detached.

Not as much as you by the sounds of it.. this evening the conversation were about :

fondue
sunglasses makes
size of their feet
what film to watch

You sound upset. I do pay a lot of their school fees. Look it up..