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Original poster

My boys go to a prestigious boarding school. Ask me anything !

1000 replies

tummyduck · 07/08/2025 13:25

Ask me anything about my boys who board at an all boys’ school ! Any disrespectful questions will be ignored

OP posts:
notwavingbutdrowning1 · 07/08/2025 17:40

tummyduck · 07/08/2025 17:30

They don’t at the school. They are not snobs.

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How do you know?

Gloriia · 07/08/2025 17:40

Do you feel any guilt that taxpayers are paying for your choices rather than you stay at home and parent?

I'm not a big boarding fan but if fully paid for by the parents then that is up to them.

Original poster
tummyduck · 07/08/2025 17:41

Muchtoomuchtodo · 07/08/2025 17:37

Does the same school really suit both kids or is it just easier to send them to the same place?

How many GCSEs will they sit and what are their predicted grades? Do you feel it’s good value for money?

Do they have the opportunity to socialise and attend clubs in the local area, outside of school or are they stuck with whatever school offers with just the other pupils that go there?

Edited

So far I have found the school suits both characters. Also they have a close relationship and so in the same boarding house

OP posts:
CarterBeatsTheDevil · 07/08/2025 17:41

Do you have to be abroad for your work as well, OP?

Waitingfordoggo · 07/08/2025 17:41

Sorry but LOL @ falconry.

Original poster
tummyduck · 07/08/2025 17:41

Gloriia · 07/08/2025 17:40

Do you feel any guilt that taxpayers are paying for your choices rather than you stay at home and parent?

I'm not a big boarding fan but if fully paid for by the parents then that is up to them.

It isn’t fully paid for by the taxpayers. Far from it

OP posts:
CarterBeatsTheDevil · 07/08/2025 17:42

Waitingfordoggo · 07/08/2025 17:41

Sorry but LOL @ falconry.

You say that, but for a brief moment that shoved me from "would never even consider it" to "is there any chance that I could go at 49?"

Original poster
tummyduck · 07/08/2025 17:42

CarterBeatsTheDevil · 07/08/2025 17:41

Do you have to be abroad for your work as well, OP?

I am a humanitarian and his posting gives me opportunities to work there too

OP posts:
Original poster
tummyduck · 07/08/2025 17:43

Waitingfordoggo · 07/08/2025 17:41

Sorry but LOL @ falconry.

My favourite is bookbinding

OP posts:
Original poster
tummyduck · 07/08/2025 17:43

MidnightMusing5 · 07/08/2025 17:40

How can you afford it?

military subsidy and working hard

OP posts:
Original poster
tummyduck · 07/08/2025 17:44

notwavingbutdrowning1 · 07/08/2025 17:40

How do you know?

Show quote history

Believe me, I know.

OP posts:
WaffleParty · 07/08/2025 17:45

Aaahh! Now it makes sense. They have no parents in any real sense, but they get to hang out with falcons 🤣

CarterBeatsTheDevil · 07/08/2025 17:45

tummyduck · 07/08/2025 17:42

I am a humanitarian and his posting gives me opportunities to work there too

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I have to admit that it's very hard for me to understand why one of you wouldn't live and work in England if you could so that they could be with one parent full time, or even just so that one of you was there every weekend if they needed you. I'm not saying it could only be you and not your husband. But I don't really understand why you and he as adults have chosen to stay together so that neither of you lives with your boys full time, if one of you could have done. I dearly love my husband but I think we'd both agree that it was more important for one of us to live with our DD than to live with each other and not with her.

BlackStrayCat · 07/08/2025 17:45

Do they still play "soggy biscuit"?

Original poster
tummyduck · 07/08/2025 17:45

bumbaloo · 07/08/2025 17:35

I think people don’t realise how long boarding school holidays are. They are many weeks longer than state school. Typically 9-10 weeks over summer, 4 weeks at Easter. 3-4 weeks at Christmas. Then there is half term which is sometimes 2 weeks and a quarter term exeat weekend.

many pupils are weekly only so they come home for half Saturday and Sunday.

when you factor that the school day is longer and all the after school club type activities state school pupils do are just part of the school day you often find parents get a lot more quality time with their dc when they board.

it may not be day to day but tbh as everyone knows, day to day is often more about logistics and ferrying people from A-B than quality time.

I do agree that emotional support during the term is not great for boarding school but it’s not some austere parentless loveless situation.

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Yes I agree - my son finished on the 30th of June

OP posts:
Original poster
tummyduck · 07/08/2025 17:45

BlackStrayCat · 07/08/2025 17:45

Do they still play "soggy biscuit"?

You what

OP posts:
Original poster
tummyduck · 07/08/2025 17:46

BlazenWeights · 07/08/2025 17:35

Nothing to add but to say… I quite like you OP 😅.

How so?! Xx

OP posts:
Couchpotato3 · 07/08/2025 17:46

How much contact do you have with your children's individual subject teachers?

Original poster
tummyduck · 07/08/2025 17:47

teamingwithcutthroattrout · 07/08/2025 17:33

Took him overseas. Presumably if you are not in the military you are not obliged to go with him? You have chosen to leave your children because you wanted to be with your husband, but are perfectly comfortable with two of your children not having either parent.

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We are still their parents - the holidays are very long. I see them frequently

OP posts:
Original poster
tummyduck · 07/08/2025 17:49

Couchpotato3 · 07/08/2025 17:46

How much contact do you have with your children's individual subject teachers?

I am very hands off when it comes to academics . They are doing well so I trust the teachers to tell me if needed. The house master will contact me if I need to speak or any issues

OP posts:
CoralOP · 07/08/2025 17:49

tummyduck · 07/08/2025 17:47

We are still their parents - the holidays are very long. I see them frequently

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But your not parenting them. You might see them sometimes where you try and instill some values into them but you are not there for them in everyday life.

Waitingfordoggo · 07/08/2025 17:50

it may not be day to day but tbh as everyone knows, day to day is often more about logistics and ferrying people from A-B than quality time.

Yes, but those little moments are what make up life! And building a really strong true connection with someone. Family life isn’t just about the high days and holidays, it’s also about the little day to day things, the conversations in the car while you’re ferrying them around to activities or when they invite their mates round and hang out in the kitchen and you get to see these lovey friendships that they’re developing. Or when they’re in a shitty mood with you and you know it’s because they’ve had a bad day or there’s a friendship problem and you get to be there and try and make them feel better. The little moments are priceless and very often the things we remember.

Original poster
tummyduck · 07/08/2025 17:50

ThatZingyMintCat · 07/08/2025 17:33

Which are the awful public schools? How do you know they are awful given you only have experience with one of them?

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I have a lot of friends who went to different public schools. If it is part of your culture you know about reputations and experiences

OP posts:
Waitingfordoggo · 07/08/2025 17:50

BlackStrayCat · 07/08/2025 17:45

Do they still play "soggy biscuit"?

I was going to ask this but didn’t dare 😂

Original poster
tummyduck · 07/08/2025 17:51

CoralOP · 07/08/2025 17:49

But your not parenting them. You might see them sometimes where you try and instill some values into them but you are not there for them in everyday life.

Show quote history

It you’re not your.
can you define a parent? Or are you saying it is not your experience ?

OP posts:
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