I run a LGBT Pride: AMA

[lgbtpride]

Long time lurker but have NC for this.

I run an LGBT Pride event. I want to deal with some of the nonsense theories that we welcome pedophiles or have banned lesbians.

Ask me anything. (Disclaimer: I won't answer anything specific that might out me.)

Pride has never been liked by every LGBT+ person and some of my closest friends hate it and think I am batshit for doing it.

But many people love it and that's why they come again and again.

Thank you for answering my question. As someone with a vulnerable relative who is a teen questioning their sexuality and at an age where they are starting to want to attend pride, the fetish and kink side and it's more promoted inclusion (you are right, it has always been there, but now there is more media focus on it so people's attention has been drawn to it) a concern. I know the parents are concerned about potential grooming and possible exposure to more experimental kinks. The young person in question is vulnerable and struggles with personal safety. They would need to attend with a responsible adult (due to vulnerabilities) so would have to go to an event where allies are accepted. Its good to know not all pride events accept fetish and kink as it opens doors for the vulnerable relative to attend one.

We as a family are trying to support them and their journey and they expressed interest in attending a pride this summer.

Also, what is the general protocol if an attendee is hateful to another attendee (not openly on a placard but more verbal and discreet in the crowds). It's a concern of the vulnerable relative - they like to know what to do if something happens.

But presumably you have parades on public streets, not hidden away behind closed doors where only those who’ve read the small print can see what’s going on?

What rights is it that the kink and fetish brigade are fighting for, that Pride supports? What does having them there add to the Pride message? I just don’t get it and agree with previous posters that it does Pride a disservice encouraging their attendance.

Thank you for this thread and for answering it so well.

When and why did you become involved in it?

You realise this is forcing people back into the closet and your own version of “don’t say gay”

honestly, can you hear yourself? Exclusively same sex attracted people are welcome as long as they don’t tell anyone or carry a banner to that effect?

Every Pride is different and has its own rules but should answer you if you drop them an email or DM on Facebook.

We have a code oof conduct on posters at all our events and our safeguarding and safety teams deal with complaints.

First attended in 1992/1993 and got involved about 15 years ago. It's a lot of work on top of a full time job but I love it and the people Imvolunteer with.

Oh dear. The "policing genitalia" response. Nobody asked you to police anybody's genitalia, only to recognise that a man can never be a woman, even if he wears a dress or calls himself Harmony Loveheart or whatever.

Gay friends and colleagues around my age (50) tell me that Pride, among other movements is increasing homophobia in their day to day lives and that they fear the loss of progress made to date.

They blame this on:

Displays of kink and fetishism in public places, and the impact on public opinion

Significantly increased emphasis on trans groups, particularly of the straight male to transwoman variety which seems to overlap with kink, being more akin to fetishistic transvestism than gender dysphoria.

The anti-woman and anti-lesbian nature of the above movement

Can you see any validity in their concerns?

(A comment that was made to me "do you think a bunch of men dressed as women, or in fetish gear, walking down your high street on a Saturday is going to stop gay men being thrown off buildings in the Middle East?")

So how would you react if somebody shows up with a "Choke on my ladydick" placard. Laugh it off? Ban it? How about "Kill terfs"?

Also, which pride flag are you using? The original? One of the alphabet soup derivatives?

I’ve been to an event for women only, Let Women Speak. Unfortunately they weren’t allowed to be heard by the women attending, because trans activists were banging drums and threatening behaviour.

would you use your network to say that is unacceptable behaviour from the TW+ community

Worked the last three Leicester Prides and they have been fabulous events with lots of colour, costumes, a vast range of people from across the board all having a whale of a time, no more issues than any other event. Still the odd drug, pick pocket, chancer etc but the crowds have been fantastic. Didn't see anything kinky but unusual colours and attire and there were children and families in attendance having a great time. It was no different to any non pride event where you have to ensure anyone suspicious, aggressive or armed is kept out.
The fireworks at the end were too late as the majority had left by then.

What is your sexuality/ fetish/ kink/ gender (whichever is relevant for why you attend pride) - do you feel well represented at pride? Do you feel there are any groups who are over or under represented?

🍿

Really interesting thread- thanks.

So as a straight female I wouldn’t be welcome to attend under the idea of generally showing support and celebrating Pride? 😱

MMA trans woman fighter anyone's thoughts of a a woman who was born a boy beating up a woman in the ring. One MMA trans woman fighter cracked a woman's skull open.

For goodness sakes OP, you've confirmed the things you were trying to disprove.

Why are Intersex people included? As I understand it, this is the older name for Disorders of Sexual Development- a medical issue.

Why are people who have got a congenial medical issue included with a protest to protect peoples being discriminated against because of their sexual orientation? Obviously people with DSD need support but I can't help feeling they are being lumped in with something that has nothing to do with them. Gay and lesbians don't have specific medical conditions that need specific support and care.

Yes this

No one cares what anyones sexuality is or if they are under or over represented. It is a day to celebrate life, joy and meet new people.

Of course you are welcome. We just ask that allies attend respectfully, not taking space from an LGBT+ person.

Do you think lesbians are ok to have pride in being exclusively same sex attracted, or should they keep it quiet at your event so as not to offend "trans women", who are male?

The Intersex organisations are divided between those who welcome the awareness-raising (10 years ago no one had heard of Intersex) and those who hate it.

We welcome Intersex people who want to use Pride to talk about their issues.

Thank you for the genuinely enquiring questions. I've enjoyed the thread so far.

I wont respond to openly hostile questions such as the one about 'alphabet soup' or questions that I've already answered.

You seem confused - you said earlier that Pride is necessary because many countries still criminalise homosexuality. Now you’re saying that people are welcome to use Pride to raise awareness of medical conditions that are nothing to do with same sex attraction.

why stop at disorders of sex development? Perhaps the British heart foundation can awareness raise at the event? Why stop at medical conditions - save the pandas should join in.