Hello, I'm a TRA - ask me anything

[AlphaTransWoman]

Good evening,

I'm a transgender rights advocate. I say "advocate" rather than "activist" because I believe in constructive debate and consensus building rather than the hostile, shouty kind of activism that gets us nowhere.

I am here because I am genuinely interested in seeing if there is some kind of compromise that can be reached between pro trans and gender critical views. Obviously this is difficult because we may disagree about something pretty fundamental. I feel passionately that trans women are women (at least in the psychological and social sense), so there's an obvious divide if you do not.

The question is, can we find ways to co-exist and find an acceptable way forward on some of the difficult issues that arise around trans acceptance? So I'm happy to have a go answering anything you care to ask in good faith. Who knows, we might even make some progress.

@GodDammitCecil

If there’s a gender neutral option available, I’ll gladly oblige. But my safety trumps other peoples feelings.

It is perfectly possible not to use women’s toilets when out and about. You are CHOOSING to do that.

LOL, so much for having a female brain and waxing lyrical about all the whimsical traits of women you want to emulate like kindness and cooperation.

😆

@AFieldGuideToTrees

Keeping myself safe from male violence, you mean? Isn’t that something women have to do?

I mean ignoring the religious beliefs of women who can't share spaces with men in order to be selfish and think only of yourself.

Not very womanly, eh? But very typically male socialised behaviour.

You are clearly in love with your idea of womanhood. It is kind of cute and I really wish you to be able to be kind, cooperative, supporting, enjoy your smile and wear any clothes you want in your everyday life, just without feeling a need to give that a label "woman".

The issue is that it is your personal idea of womanhood. It is a definition which isn't relevant, practical or even true for many women.

I value my rational brain, never wear makeup, and I don't consider myself particularly caring. I am female and I live my whole life in the society which behaves differently to me just because of that.

Now what? Are you suggesting you are a better woman than me?

Is there evidence of trans women being attacked in male toilets? Because there is plenty of evidence of women being attacked by males in women’s toilets. Why should your desire to feel safe trump that of a woman’s?

You haven't answered the pertinent questions.
You have repeatedly told us womanhood is a series of dangerous and outdated stereotypes and talked over every attempt we make to explain this.

Male behaviour.

You are a transvestite. There is no shame in that. But your repeated posts telling us how wrong we are in our womaning is male behaviour.

Soin short: We've seen it all before. AMA my fanny. You just want to spout your TRA (activist not advocate) rubbush

Ha ! Well here we are.
If you were a real woman you would budge up and let the marginalised women have their spaces back. But you are an entitled male so women of some faiths (who may or may not feel oppressed by it) can get to fuck. Got it.

Having said this, I think society grossly undervalues certain roles that women are attracted to and often excel at. Caring would be an example of this.

When I see trans women queuing up to work in care homes for minimum wage, I'll start to think more kindly of them.

ME ME ME ME ME

It’s not your safety over other people’s feelings.

It’s women’s safety. Not their feelings. When biological men feel it’s ok to use women’s spaces women are put at risk. You are normalising men being in women’s spaces.

You are choosing yours perception of safety over the safety of women. And simply don’t care. because this is about wanting to be a woman.

The issue with so many trans women is that they don’t leave their misogyny behind when they put on the dress or get fake boobs. This thread is a prime example of it. Biological men expecting women to centre biological men.

@AlphaTransWoman MY personal safety trumps everyone else!?
Haha you are a peach aren't you, you selfish pig!
People like you are why some women don't go out, why some women can't go out, but as long as YOU are safe that's alright!
What an absolutely disgusting thing to say and it just proves you don't care about women at all and you never will, you just care about you and what you feel.
It is not my job or anyone elses to validate your feelings!
Just stay out of womens spaces fullstop!

"My safety trumps other people's feelings."

That is OUR repeated refrain.

And no. You can't have that either.

Also @AlphaTransWoman this will probably get deleted, but it's worth repeating...

WOMEN DON'T HAVE A PENIS!!!

If you have, or have ever had a penis you are not a woman!

I got you to say it in black and white.

You’re not a woman. You wish you were a woman.

It's not just because "you're there". It's because thanks to TRA campaigning any male can use women's spaces.

Easy one for you - yes or no, have you understood this? That making all spaces mixed-sex has greater consequences than just allowing you to be in them?

Any male can self-identify into the spaces you use - are you happy or not happy with this?

This is what baffles me about the lack of campaigning for third spaces. Males both claim that using toilets with other males in is life threatening, yet campaign for all spaces to be mixed sex. or, as OP seems to want - to divide spaces into "more rational and competitive" and "less rational and competitive" people.

The old question "how exactly do you propose to police this" raises its head ...

Again, just so we’re all clear, ‘I am a woman with a penis’ are the words of a fantasist who should under no circumstances be taken seriously

OK sorry but that's just daft. If another person chooses to misgender me and decides not to use the ladies because I'm there, then that is her problem and not mine. End of.

I wonder how many women and girls excluding themselves from spaces designed for them would it need for it to become a problem, not just 'her' problem.

If every woman and girl are excluded from female spaces because men use them, would TRA see it as a problem? I suspect not.

Years ago on here, a man was insisting that he was a woman, in part, because of his height. Its the same here, being female is determined by reproduction potential, not personality.

It doesnt matter what personality a man has, how he feel, what he wears or the drugs he takes, he can never be a woman because he has different biology.

Surely it would be safer for you and more respectful of women to just not use women’s toilets? You can’t be SO poor at planning you just have to piss wherever you are? Just find places with appropriate toilets for your sex that also allow you to feel comfortable and use those or don’t pee when you’re out and about.

But you are trumping our safety, it isn’t about feelings you are saying that because you feel uncomfortable and unsafe you have to come into an environment that makes us feel unsafe.

that kind of privilege is something women never experience

I find much of the toilet discussion bananas. The characteristic that separates Toilets is sex (with the addition of special provision for the disabled and rarely children). Your gender isn’t relevant.

My son was quite badly verbally abused in the boys toilets at school. If I remember rightly he was also told to get out of the men's toilets in the local shopping centre. Interestingly enough because his long hair made some twats think he was trans. (At least that's what he said happened, I'm not convinced it wasn't more than that)

Anyway. He no longer feels comfortable in public toilets. His solution isn't to use the women's where he'd feel "safe" because he is male. His solution is to not pee for an entire day if necessary. I asked him if he thought he should/could just say he's a (trans) woman and use the women's toilets. He said "no because I'm not. And transwomen shouldn't use them either"

So while I agree that men/boys can be absolutely vile, hence he won't use men's facilities, the solution isn't to use the ladies.

I suppose it depends on the public toilet, but i dont believe a woman would be in immediate danger entering a typical male facility.

Is the mens loos in a department store full of men ready to beat and rape women? I doubt it.

But what is the probability of a man entering a women only toilet being there for voyerism, or the opportunity to be there alone with a woman or girl? Id say that was higher.

So when a man enters a womans space, women will automatically feel threatened, on edge. It doesn't matter if the man is a teen, or short, or wearing women's clothes, the woman will stop and assess the situation.

What TRA are doing is telling woman, and more importantly girls, to ignore that instinct in their head, and let that man do what he wants anyway.

The idea that men think are some situations where he has a right to force woman and girls to ignore their feels or remove themselves from public services for his wants and needs is mind-blowing.

The idea that men think are some situations where he has a right to force woman and girls to ignore their feels or remove themselves from public services for his wants and needs is mind-blowing.

And the only people doing this are transwomen.

Which makes them much worse than men.

Most men are nice, decent, considerate. Unlike most transwomen.