I'm a practising Muslim, ask me anything...

[tt9]

For context, I am late 30s female practising Muslim medical professional and have been practising for most of my adult life (to varying degrees).

Feel like a lot of people have questions that they don't ask as they fear causing offence. also there are some commonly held beliefs regarding muslims/Islam that are urban myths... so ask away. no question too offensive

The only one I’m curious is about, is, how are you treated as a woman in the Muslim faith? How are the majority of men with you?

I have some idea in my head that it’s patriarchal but I could be wrong

Have you made the pilgrimage to Mecca?

Why are male muslims so obsessed with what women wear?

Well within Islamic law both men and women are given rights on a contextual basis. for example, a woman has full rights to work, study and do whatever she wants with her life within and outside marriage. however, whatever she earns is hers and her husband has the duty to financially support her so she has the option to stay at home and be a full time mum if she wants. outside the home, she has equal rights eg. the vote (Islam has a referendum based democratic system), the right to own property etc.

in terms of islamic teaching, there is a strong focus on supporting women. for example the Prophet (peace be upon him) said "those you are the best, who are the best to their wives". "those of you who have a daughter and look after her, educate her and find her a good partner will be with me in paradise" in his last sermon he reminded Muslim men to be kind to the women. at the time when the Quran was revealed and the Prophet (peace be upon him) was born, women were bought and sold like cattle, people used to bury their daughters alive. so at the time, changing all of that was an enormous revolution.

in the Qur'an the words man and woman are used an equal number of times. and ultimately we believe the soul has no gender, so we will all be treated as equal in front of God.

in terms of how Muslims are today. I find Muslim men who truly practice Islam, will treat women not just equally but with deference. they will speak respectfully and feel a keen sense of duty of care without being patronising.

however, culture is another thing. in many cultures around the world women are treated awfully and local cultures of Muslims around the world are no different. in many places they will "use" Islam to justify their action while directly going against islamic teachings. Afghanistan is a prime example of that. that sort of thing makes me sick. this fuels the perception that Islam itself is misogynistic.

as to how myself am treated, I have faced misogyny from both Muslims and non Muslims. but I don't take any crap, I just shut it down.

Do you wear full Islamic dress or just cover your hair?

yes I have been very lucky to do so. although there are two types of pilgrimage - hajj which is only done at a specific time of year and is an extensive three day process and umrah which is much shorter (few hours) and can be done at any time.

I have only done umrah and it was beautiful. what particularly struck me is the complete equality of humanity as people come from all sorts of backgrounds, cultures, races, men and women and partake in the same ritual on an equal basis. everyone is truly equal there.

some are. and I have no idea why. it has nothing to do with religion. in the Qur'an it tells us there is no compulsion in religion.
yes women are advised to dress modestly and cover their hair but that decisio is between them and God. nothing to do with men and certainly should not be enforced (there is no Islamic basis for this type of enforcement).
it's the old story of men wanting to control women's bodies. the same men are not really talking about the rules of modesty in Islam as it applies to men lol.

I don't understand the need to cover a woman's hair. Why? If it is to stop the 'male gaze', then isn't the issue with the male and their own self control?

I have wondered this about people who hold a faith of any kind.

How do you know God is real? Do you "know" it or "believe" it, or is that just semantics?

not sure what you mean by full islamic dress. I normally will wear a long dress and hijab, but sometimes loose trousers and a longish top (just above knee). at work I wear scrubs and hijab.
I did once upon a time covered my face and that was the most life changing, beautiful thing as it allowed me to have privacy in the most public of places and helped on my spiritual journey. unfortunately I stopped due to islamophobic incidents and also due to my health. I also felt people were genuinely afraid, and I didn't want to Subject them to that.

all my decisions on dress have been part of my journey towards building a connection with God, rather than men.

Muslim men and women are ordered to lower their gaze - I.e. not stare and perv at the opposite gender. both men and women are ordered to dress modestly and men also cover their hair in a different way. some devout Muslim men actually wear something that looks like hijab.

the hijab is more than covering of hair, its an act of humility before God.

it's also about reducing vanity, or judgement based on looks (the time I save getting ready in the morning is unbelievable). women, young women in particular have severe body image issues leading to mental health problems. we all know the effects comparitis from looking at unattainable beautiful photos. so if we took all that out of society, think about how much it would help young women? they would value their own individual bodies without thinking there is some standard they must match up to. and same with men...

finally the hijab or generally how both Muslim men and women are advised to dress is also part of the religious ritual and identity. we also cover like this when we prat. and many Muslim women will tell you when they put the hijab on they feel closer to God. I know some very devout women who also wear their hijab at home and even in their sleep as they are continually praying or meditating. but these are exceptions.

I love your question. part of my engagement with Islam is purely logic based, but there is also faith and love.

I come from a scientific background, with a keen interest in theoretical physics and quantum mechanics. the more I studied, learned and observed the world around me, it became clear that there has to be a creator. i also read scriptures of the main religions and the only one that made sense to me was Islam.

at the same time, I have always felt connected to something and that connection deepened as I started praying and meditating and learning about Islam. I feel like the logic and faith feed off each other.

@tt9 thank you so much for your thoughtful answer. I am intrigued that your engagement with Islam helps you feel more intimately connected and involved with the world around you, but I hear that it totally makes sense to you as a scientist. I find it so interesting that, for you, the logic and faith are intrinsically linked and can tell how fulfilling your religion is for you.

I asked this on a previous thread but what are your views on singing the national anthem and the union flag? Both contain references to Christianity (lyrics and symbolism). Does this cause any religious conflict with you?

Tell me about your friendships. Do you find that your Muslim friends tend to socialise in gender segregated (rather than mixed sex) groups? If so, do you miss having male friends? Or are you friendly with non Muslim men and women?

i also read scriptures of the main religions and the only one that made sense to me was Islam

Where you not raised in a Muslim family then?

Do you have male friends?

What do you think about homosexual people?

What's your opinion on transgenderism?

What do you think of other religious faiths?

Would you or have you ever used contraception?

Thank you!

Do you think it’s too hard for Muslims and non Muslims to make friends? I have some friends from religious backgrounds but none who are practising themselves (and I’m not living a wild life that would put people off!)

Do you have children? If one of your children or another in your community didn't want to be Muslim anymore or started to commit what you view as a sin, i.e. fornication, drinking too much alcohol, homosexuality, would you cut them out of your life? Would this apply also to your children?

I had to look up the lyrics lol. nothing in there that is in opposition of islamic beliefs as we also believe in God. and waving a national flag is perfectly fine.

However as a staunch republican, I would find it very uncomfortable to sing the national anthem.

and as Muslims we are strongly encouraged to respect followers of other religions. for example when a group of Christian emissaries came for talks with the Prophet (peace be upon him), he offered them the mosque to hold their services.

there is no set pattern, all according to individual preferences. most of my friends are men, my best friend is a man. so maybe I am the wrong person to answer this?
of course in certain cultures, there is a bit of a gender segregation. in some cases there is self segregation I.e. men and women naturally segregate themselves. but according to islamic beliefs, there is no prohibition on mixed gender friendships.

the Prophet (peace be upon him) had both male and female companions.

I was born into a Muslim family but did not really practice/believe until I went through the process of self realisation when i was 17/18. my parents taught me basics, but left me to my own devices.

What's your view of gender roles within the household? I have a Muslim friend who believes men should do all of the housework and women should only take care of the children, and she says this is a widespread view. Is this typical?

Do you find your self judging, even involuntarily, how some non Muslim women may dress?

yes! for some reason most of my friends are men... not through active choice, just happened to be the case...

I don't really have any views on samesex attracted people. it's their business.

I feel sad for the people that are genuinely transgender as they suffer a great deal for various reasons. the way the issue is being used as a political football currently and the appropriation of women's spaces/identities is another matter.

I feel people should be supported and encouraged to practise their religion without discrimination (and this is the islamic viewpoint). I love talking to followers of other religions and learning about their beliefs and practices.

contraception is allowed and would absolutely use it.

thanks for the great questions :-)