I’m a reborn mum, AMA

[Chloefairydust]

There’s a lot of misunderstanding and judgment regarding the hobby. Just wanted to see if anyone had any questions. I have one reborn doll, that looks realistic and weighs the same as an average newborn. I like to buy cute outfits to dress her up in. I find it incredibly soothing to hold and rock her in the evening. And sometimes like to take her out in the pram. I don’t see her as a real baby, I’m aware it’s a doll. She is a piece of art, much talent goes into sculpting and painting the reborn baby dolls. She is also a therapy doll, I suffer anxiety and the doll helps me. I work in a nursing home where I see the benefits of doll therapy with dementia patients. I’m also exploring getting into the painting side of the hobby…. Ask me anything? …

A few years ago I was in town and admired what I thought was a beautiful sleeping baby in a pram. The lady smiled and said she was actually a reborn doll. I could not see anything wrong in it and the lady obviously had her reasons for having one.

I remember the tesco man, he punched the baby because he was trying to cheer up its sibling. It's awful but reading the quotes from trial as he explained it to the judge I have to admit I laughed at how preposterous it was. Even if it was a doll how does punching it cheer the owner up? Either way you were going to upset someone?? He seemed genuinely remorseful but I can never get over how he ever thought it was a good idea to punch a doll. In what universe? Like an evil Mr Bean.

My question is, what does taking the doll out in the pram do for you and how does it make you feel? I can understand collecting dolls and can understand playing with them but I can't understand taking it out in the pram. I would have thought if it wasn't kept in a cot then it wouldn't go out in a pram, that if you were taking it somewhere you'd take it in a bag?

Making the previous lego comparison, I can understand collecting it, building it and transporting it to play with it somewhere else. But, I'd find it odd to see an adult playing with it outside in the street or the shop, or carrying it along with them unless I was at a lego convention. The pram bit is the bit I can't understand?

Violinist64 - They absolutely can look so realistic can’t they, especially if you find a good artist, I know there’s a lot of dolls out there where the artist hasn’t got it right and they can look scary/ strange/ ugly or even scary. But when you see one painted well they do kind of take your breath away, the realism is just incredible. It’s only if you get super close and see the doll isn’t breathing that you realise, although there’s artists out there who even make reborns to appear like their breathing.
And thank you for being kind to that lady, it’s true that you don’t know what she has been through or her reason for having a doll, she could just be a collector and enjoying the doll, however she might have experienced a loss. She must have felt comfortable enough to trust you to tell you.

wrongwayapricot - I take my reborn out in the pram when going to a busy place, like a shopping mall. I have anxiety that can be triggered by busy and crowded places. By taking the reborn out in a pram it helps me to feel safer, I feel like the attention is on the baby and not on me. It also gives me a distraction. But I have spoken to other people on a forum for reborn mums and there are other reasons. Some experience infertility and can never have their own baby, so they get comfort from pushing around their reborn in a pram, others have experienced a loss. Some women have kids who have grown out of the baby stage and miss the feeling of pushing a baby around in a pram. Some do it to test the realism of their baby, they enjoy their collection but want to see if other people will notice it’s a doll or believe it’s a baby. If the baby passes as real then they know they have a good reborn doll. Artists tend to do that too to test the realism of the baby before putting them up for sale. I must admit a pram can be useful for putting stuff in if I’m shopping, saves having to carry heavy bags.

Having the reborn baby in a bag wouldn’t have the same effect, plus they are heavy, they weigh the same as a newborn, and are quite delicate.

I think people might also be alarmed watching me pull out what looks like a sleeping baby from a bag too. 😂

I have a number of dolls as an adult, but mainly Sasha dolls and they live in my bookcases. However, I've read this thread with interest and looked up Kelli Maple on YouTube - her enthusiasm is evident and she's certainly not harming anyone.

However, all the talk of prams has reminded me that as a child, I had a lovely Silver Cross dolls' pram and also a beautiful, very docile and lovely cat. I used to put a dolls' bonnet on the cat, cover her in a blanket and wheel her round the neighbourhood. More than once, a nice woman would put her head into my pram to admire the expected doll, and be thoroughly startled to encounter a black cat.

I love black cats.

I think I would prefer to stick my head round a pram hood to find a black cat than I would a lifelike dolly, or a real baby 🙊

joanieclothing.com/dawn-o-porter-x-joanie-caipirinha-cat-lady-intarsia-jumper.html

soz for tangent.

Aww I used to do the same with my pet cat when I was little. I would sometimes even dress her up in my dolls clothes, would wrap her in a blankets and she would purr as I push her around in my dolly pram around the house and garden. Haha daft cat would let me do anything to her. I don’t think I have had a cat since that’s been quite as patient lol.

And I watched a few of Kelli Maples videos on you tube, she seems like a sweet girl. If I remember right I think in one of her videos she spoke of her struggles with depression and anxiety. She has an amazing collection of dolls though, not just reborns but all kinds of dolls. She seems to get a lot out of the role play part of the hobby. Personally I have never really role played with my reborn, I’m quite content to dress her up and cuddle her, as well as pushing her around in a pram. She actually came with a baby bottle with some fake milk in it, I never have used it, maybe I should try to sell it on eBay 🤔

I have anxiety that can be triggered by busy and crowded places. By taking the reborn out in a pram it helps me to feel safer

I get this 100% because I feel exactly the same, thank you for your answer. Now my son isn't in his pram I find pushing the trolley helps me, just wish I could keep pushing it down the street too. I think for me it's the distance it creates between strangers, people don't usually (there's always one space invader) come as close when you have a pram.

This is true, I hate when people bump into you or crowd around too close, a pram definitely gives a bit more distance.

Thank you for making this OP @Chloefairydust . I'll admit that I've always found the reborn thing creepy and strange. But reading your posts I can really see how yours helps you. I can absolutely imagine how pushing it in the pram enables you to cope in busy places too.

I will be less judgy and more open to understanding those who have them, now.

That was completely my intention for starting the thread. There’s so much misunderstanding on the hobby and the kind of women who who partake in it. And a lot of hate in the world generally for anyone who doesn’t fit in what’s considered the norm I think. And I don’t think anyone should have to hide away in the shadows because they fear judgment, it’s kind of a shame. I think the misunderstanding out there as well is that a woman with reborn dolls must have some sort of mental illness which absolutely isn’t always the case. I mean perhaps I’m not the best example with my anxiety, although I think that’s quite a common condition and otherwise I’m quite normal (at least no one has told me otherwise to my face 😂) .

I did have to psych myself up to starting the thread, I knew there would probably be a lot of hate. I must admit some of the comments were more disgusting that I expected, but I guess there’s always one that likes to lower the tone.

@Chloefairydust I think it's a great thread and as I said earlier, it's inspired me to watch a few YouTube videos. It's certainly not harmful to anyone else and if it gives solace or reduces anxiety, which I have to admit I hadn't considered before reading your posts, it can only be a good thing. I'm a recovering alcoholic of 15 years - if I'd bought a doll instead of the terrible things I did, I'd have saved a lot of people a lot of pain! I also think you've responded really well to everyone - very considered and measured replies.

Do you have one of those squishy realistic silicone babies? They look so good on the adverts. It makes me really want one, but I already have my hands full with kids and babies.

No I have a vinyl baby. I really want a silicone though. They are very realistic but also super expensive so I’m going to save up for one.

My mental health worsened since i got rid of my reborn dolls and I'm embarrassed to admit i want them back

Ive had 9 miscarriages my last miscarriage was 17yr ago i lost my little girl at 17wk pregnant ive not been able to get pregnant since and am going through menopause im only 35 i had reborn dolls myself as i used to self harm lot smoke cigs smoke weed wouldnt go out anywhere would avoid food shoppimg as would struggle with walking stick and bags and severe anxiety when i had my reborn dolls i did set up a nursery in my spare room as it wasnt getting used and became a sensory room for me the reborn dolls stopped me from self harming improved my self esteem and my confidence and helped me go from isolated to being social the pram gave me a person with hidden disabilities meaning mobility issues gave me independence and made shopping much easier for me also i was never hurting anyone by taking them out in pram and only question and comment i got was how old is your baby and ooh what a very quiet baby id tell them it wasnt real and educate them I don't agree with minority of reborn community using real formula tho most of use fake formula made from water cornflour and vanilla essence and some of us who are eczema sufferers have found baby shampoo and body wash helps us and that we can also bathe the silicone dolls as other reborns have vinyl arms and legs with cloth stuffed bodies

Look at vollence silicone doll and ivita silicone doll on amazon cheaper than 1k and still realistic ive had 2 off vollence both took newborn size dummys so didn't have to make magnetic dummies

Hello, I’ll be honest that I’ve always found it sort of strange but also can 100% get it. I absolutely love babies and before I had my children used to secretly buy little newborn clothes and put them in a box as if made me feel so maternal and happy. My mum still had all my old dolls so I used to hold them (not that I told anyone!) I think they look so adorable and can imagine getting that rush of love when you hold them 🥰 but that’s why I was so desperate to have babies of my own!
How old are you op?

Also why do you want silicon? How many other people
dl you know with one?

I’ve had another Google and omg they’re so realistic!

How did you choose your doll and would her looking like you be an important factor in your decision?