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AMA
Original poster

I was in a relationship with a drug dealer

129 replies

roseblushes · 21/12/2021 14:49

And spent a lot of time in that world around other dealers, seeing what it was like.

Stuck in isolating and my friend suggested this would be a good AMA to do. Not sure if anyone would be interested but happy to answer any questions!

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Original poster
roseblushes · 21/12/2021 14:53

I should've added a pretty high powered one.

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Yumchips · 21/12/2021 14:54

Did you feel safe? Were you around violence or aware of it?

Felix125 · 21/12/2021 14:56

How did you justify morally staying with him?

MaryAndGerryLivingInDerry · 21/12/2021 14:57

What sort of things did he(?) buy you? And did you openly acknowledge they were funded by drugs or did you pretend you didn’t know? What did you tell your friends?

myyellowcar · 21/12/2021 14:58

Were they violent towards you or did you feel that they could become violent if something went wrong in your relationship?

Original poster
roseblushes · 21/12/2021 14:58

@Yumchips

Did you feel safe? Were you around violence or aware of it?
I felt safe until his home was broken into a couple of times when I wasn't there and I felt unsafe there after that.
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Original poster
roseblushes · 21/12/2021 14:58

@Felix125

How did you justify morally staying with him?
Ignorance
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iwannascream · 21/12/2021 14:59

Are you still with him/her ? Did you know what they did before you started a relationship ? Has it changed your views on drugs ? Are you still together ?

Original poster
roseblushes · 21/12/2021 14:59

@MaryAndGerryLivingInDerry

What sort of things did he(?) buy you? And did you openly acknowledge they were funded by drugs or did you pretend you didn’t know? What did you tell your friends?
Shoes, meals, holidays, clothes etc. I knew how they were funded.

My friends knew.

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Double3xposure · 21/12/2021 14:59

Why? Didn’t you know what he did ? Did you grow up in care ?

Original poster
roseblushes · 21/12/2021 15:00

@myyellowcar

Were they violent towards you or did you feel that they could become violent if something went wrong in your relationship?
He was never violent towards me and it wasn't something I was ever at all worried about
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MaryAndGerryLivingInDerry · 21/12/2021 15:00

“How did you justify morally staying with him?”

Ignorance

And spent a lot of time in that world around other dealers, seeing what it was like.

Confused
MaryAndGerryLivingInDerry · 21/12/2021 15:01

I knew how they were funded.

I know you knew, I’m asking if you openly acknowledged it or pretended you didn’t know?

Original poster
roseblushes · 21/12/2021 15:01

@iwannascream

Are you still with him/her ? Did you know what they did before you started a relationship ? Has it changed your views on drugs ? Are you still together ?
No we aren't together anymore. I knew what he did before we got together. It has definitely changed my view on drugs, I see what happens behind the scenes and it makes me very uncomfortable now. It's also put me off ever going near a drug again.
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SarahDippity · 21/12/2021 15:01

Are you very attractive and/young? How did you meet? When did it dawn on you how involved he was with drugs?

SouthOfFrance · 21/12/2021 15:01

Did he take drugs himself?

Original poster
roseblushes · 21/12/2021 15:02

@MaryAndGerryLivingInDerry

“How did you justify morally staying with him?”

Ignorance

And spent a lot of time in that world around other dealers, seeing what it was like.

Confused

I mean that I was ignorant to how wrong it was and what I was supporting. I knew what he was doing,I just didn't understand the weight.
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Original poster
roseblushes · 21/12/2021 15:03

@Double3xposure

Why? Didn’t you know what he did ? Did you grow up in care ?
Immaturity, an attraction to that sort of man, being in love. I didn't grow up in care.
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Original poster
roseblushes · 21/12/2021 15:03

@MaryAndGerryLivingInDerry

I knew how they were funded.

I know you knew, I’m asking if you openly acknowledged it or pretended you didn’t know?

Openly acknowledged it
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madisonbridges · 21/12/2021 15:04

Did it make you feel important being with some with power over others? Did you feel it raised your status?

Original poster
roseblushes · 21/12/2021 15:05

@SarahDippity

Are you very attractive and/young? How did you meet? When did it dawn on you how involved he was with drugs?
I'm early twenties. We had mutual friends and from a similar area. It only dawned on me when things were starting to get serious and he was more open with me.
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Original poster
roseblushes · 21/12/2021 15:05

@SouthOfFrance

Did he take drugs himself?
He smoked weed, but nothing else
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Original poster
roseblushes · 21/12/2021 15:05

@madisonbridges

Did it make you feel important being with some with power over others? Did you feel it raised your status?
That was definitely a part of what drew me to him at first
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madisonbridges · 21/12/2021 15:06

You saud he wasn't violent with you but was he violent to others?

Original poster
roseblushes · 21/12/2021 15:07

@madisonbridges

You saud he wasn't violent with you but was he violent to others?
Yes he was. Never with any weapons or serious harm, but he could be violent toward others he has "issues" with. This became apparent further on in the relationship and was a big part of the reason things ended
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