I'm a trans man and local trans activist, AMA

[Sideris]

Hi there, folks.

As the title says, I'm here to respond to questions in good nature.

For a bit of background information, I'm 30 years old, a trans activist out of necessity (being the first 'out' trans person in numerous spaces, which didn't have any rules or regulations before, but have since been commended for ease of process by some new trans members or trans members who have been referred by me), have been 'passing' for about three years, now.

@Canadianpancake - AMA appears to be AMA as long as you fundamentally agree with me, otherwise I'll flounce.

The OP started this thread at 7am and was still replying at 12 midday, on page 11. 5 hours of checking a thread and replying is hardly flouncing pancake. What you really wanted to do was to put the OP down somehow so picked the "Flounce" attack even though it doesn't fit with the facts.

I find this thread very offence, some of the language used against natal women is very offensive. I am an adult human female. I always have been.

I am not a cervix haver because I had a radical hysterectomy when I had my legs removed. While I don't need a cervical smear I do need a vaginal smear. What would you call me? A vagina haver?

Why then can't I call a trans woman a cock haver if they still have a cock? I have done this IRL and caused deep offense - apparently. Why? I am guessing saying cock haver to a trans woman will get me deleted. But, you get away with calling women cervix havers.

7am to midday is not 11 hours?

You can believe you are a man and identify as one but that cannot make you a man.

Back to my deciding to identify as a black woman. I can put my hair in braids. I can take tablets that will darken my skin tone so I look more like a mixed or black woman. I can tell people I am black, tick the appropriate box on paperwork and embrace black culture. This will not make me a black woman no matter how much I might want to be or feel like one. My dna categorically confirms I am not a black woman.

I would also suspect many black people would not accept my concept of myself as black and feel angry about me insisting they accept me as one of their own.

OP you still havent answered the questions about what makes you Male rather than Female. Saying you "feel" male and that you are male because it now says so on your Birth Certificate isn't answering the question.

I'm really not trying to be difficult. I just can't see why you feel you are male and am hoping you can explain.

@midgebabe - try reading the post again.

This might help -

The OP started this thread at 7am and was still replying at 12 midday, on page 11.
Five hours of checking a thread and replaying is hardly flouncing

@Suebnm
I no longer have a cervix due to having to have a hysterectomy for medical reasons. Are you in the uk? I wasn’t told I needed a vaginal smear.

The OP started this thread at 7am and was still replying at 12 midday, on page 11. 5 hours of checking a thread and replying is hardly flouncing pancake. What you really wanted to do was to put the OP down somehow so picked the "Flounce" attack even though it doesn't fit with the facts

The OP started the thread to “ask me anything”. It’s a fairly reasonable assumption that if they’re no longer doing what their OP said they would, they’ve flounced.

Very interesting thread. OP is saying they are a man literally because they want other people to see them as a man.
Question:
If being a man/woman is so unimportant, and has no relation to biological reality - shouldn't we stop discriminating by it? Why have woman only spaces if woman is as insignificant as a pronoun preference? And specially when there is no binary and it's all a spectrum etc.

There is this biological concept of reproductive category though that does make a real difference to people's lives. Even if their reproductive system is not functional, the human race splits almost perfectly according to which of two categories a person's body developed according to. Darned if I can think of names for the two categories though.

You feel very strongly you have a gender identity that is different to your sex. We feel very strongly that we don't have gender identities at all and all we have is a sex, a gender that was imposed on us from society and a personality

Seems we're a bit stuck

A compromise would be what has always been, you can call yourself what you like, wear what you like and we'll be polite and go along with it

^^This. Why is it ok for you to believe what you to believe, but not ok for other people to believe what they believe?

I've tried very hard to follow the twists, turns and evasions OP. But you lost me when you denied the existence of biological sex. It's like denying the existence of oxygen or gravity, to be frank.

I have nothing personal against you OP. I do have a great deal against the men who will use this as an opportunity to harm women and female children and against the political cowardice that has allowed this narrative to reach so far.

”Do you think everyone has a 'gender identity'?

Personally I don't think everyone does. I view it like religion: a strong belief that some people hold but not everyone, and it would be absurd to insist that everyone has a religion, but I do see people saying everyone has a gender identity.
I really dont think I do. I don't identify as anything. I don't agree to the stereotype that comes with 'woman', I just exist as female or 'a person with a womb', and I think a lot of people feel that way.”

That is exactly how I feel. I have a sex- that’s my biology and is factual. I have a personal identity that is unique to me, and therefore can’t be labelled. That’s it. I get very unhappy indeed if people try and stereotype me, put me in boxes or make assumptions about me.

Jesus Christ what a shit show. No real answers to any of the questions just more mental gymnastics to make the words fit the agenda.

People with a cervix? Really. So if I don't have a cervix what am I? Surely reducing people to their body parts is the kind of thing that the trans community are against? But it's ok to say 'cervix havers?

I won't even get into the drag thing. Such utter nonsense.

I agree YouJust

I’m happy to address you how you choose even though I don’t believe in gender identity. Why can you not give me the same courtesy?

I’m a woman. Through biology. Not a cervix have. Actually as I’ve pointed out, I don’t have one of those.

I wouldn’t say flounced, but they haven’t posted for 3 and a half hours now, and didn’t say they were taking a break or anything, just left posters hanging wondering if they’re coming back or not. Which I don’t find massively good natured.

I can only imagine considering the issues raised by the (respectful, intelligent) questions posted on this thread could end up being quite upsetting though, if you have based your identity around concepts that you don’t actually have pinned down enough to be able to answer basic questions about it coherently. OP has suffered sexual abuse, mental health issues and struggled with their identity. I can understand maybe they didn’t realise what they were taking on by offering this AMA, and as other posters have said I do feel a lot of sympathy for the OP.

I empathise and accept with you believing you should be the other sex and needing to change for your mental well being.

But i don't see the need to change the english language and laws.

Can't you see that your need to be a male and referred to as a male, and the law and language changes you demand, are removing my need to be referred to as a woman. I am a woman not people with a cervix. Why is your need apparently more important than mine?

Can you explain why you HAVE to be a man with the birth certificate
and the changes in law and language, rather than a woman that now wishes to be seen as and treated as a man in society. Called a man for all intents and purposes. That way you would not upset and offend others. Thousands of others. Why do your feelings count more?

@DeeZastris
I’d like a list of manly feelings. Thanks.

There are none. Feelings have no gender

Aren't you contradicting yourself as you felt you were a male.

Gone? Drat, that was a waste of 20 mins of my time then.

Hope you're still reading OP.

What do you mean when you say sex is a construct?

How can you be a trans man if you're not biologically female?

Well, I have read the whole thread and seen no satisfactory answers to the questions, OP.
You don't respond to those asking if you claim that sex and gender are not important, then why are you making such a big fuss about it? It seems that you insist on being identified and labelled as a man.
Also please stop insulting women with the term 'people with a cervix' - I am a woman and find it offensive, same for being called a 'cis' woman or 'natal' woman. Do you routinely refer to men as 'people with a penis'? No, didn't think so.
You talk about trans women having used female toilets etc for years ... yes I think we all know this has happened, but the difference is that they (that tiny percentage of the population) were doing so quietly and hoping not to be noticed as different. As women are generally kinder and more tolerant than men in these matters, we have not minded. What we DO mind is now that any old bloke with or without female clothing has the right to access women's spaces, and these people, the one who are screaming out for attention, are the ones that we DO mind.
Finally, how dare you assume the skin colour or race etc of people on MN forums ..... I thought we were not supposed to assume anything about anyone these days.

WHERE ARE YOU OP?

Maybe it's night or work day where OP is.

I’d really like clarification on this person who wants sexual harassment legalised.

Wow what a thread.
It's interesting that a trans man is so bothered by language and society's expectations (as they see it) that they spend so much time getting GPs etc to change practices in their favour. Yet they are so hostile and oppressive when women ask for our language / identity and biology to be respected.

No women anywhere are demanding to share toilets / changing rooms / hospital wards / refuges etc with men . It isn't happening. Yet people like the OP and other trans activists are forcing it on an unwilling group simply because it suits their personal preferences. It is oppression and bullying of women by a powerful group.

So my question is OP - can you cite examples of where women are demanding to share showers, toilets, changing rooms, hospital wards etc with men who self identify as women?

The OP started this thread at 7am and was still replying at 12 midday, on page 11. 5 hours of checking a thread and replying is hardly flouncing pancake. What you really wanted to do was to put the OP down somehow so picked the "Flounce" attack even though it doesn't fit with the facts.

During the stated 5 hours, the op actually answered relatively few of the many pertinent questions asked in the thread, and did so in an increasingly incoherent, contradictory and aggressive manner. Then nothing. I'd call that flouncing.