I left a cult. AMA

[stillbeingwatched]

I recently left a religious sect /cult.

AMA.

Thanks for the responses op,

Wishing you and your family all the best x

Hi
Your thread brought back memories, hope it's ok to share
I too was in a Christian cult, left about 12 years ago after being there for 4 years
Even though it's a long time ago, some things still haunt me from time to time

I got involved in it after moving to London from a rural area and feeling quite lost, the instant friends, activities and the chance of being part of something pulled me on, followed by brainwashing of their teachings with so many activities and engagements that took up all free time,raving little space to question things

I rented a room at the tile, and was swiftly envisaged to move out into one of their flats as the landlord was male and I therefore was living in sin

Literally all free time was taken up by the cult
The 2 things I truly regret are insisting not to work any Sunday's, which meant that my boss at the tome missed her brothers wedding. Not attending a Sunday was not an option though

Secondly, we were asked to actively try and get others to join
This wasn't my strong point, but one girl did join because of me approaching her
She also left, but I feel very guilty of, in a way, robbing her of a few years of her life

I started doubting the teachings, but leaving would mean giving up all my friends. During my time there I lost most of my previous non cult friends, as worldly people can't be trusted

I was told my doubts were because my faith was weak, and asked to do extra bible studies etc.

A gathering with some leader from an American branch of the church as well as his late teen daughters helped making the decision to leave in the end. The daughters had grown up on the church, and were close to robots, hard to explain, but like they had never been given the chance to find their own identify. I do hope they managed to leave and are ok. Would be so tough though, at least I lived in 'the world' before.

2 flat mates (all cult members) and I decided all to leave at the same time in the end.
Leaders told me I was going to hell and taking my friends with me, and the following Sunday everyone was told not to contact us ever again, as we would poison their minds and lead them into sin

The first no cult Sunday was the weirdest experience. Went to oxford street with one of the friends that just left, and it was the oddest feeling of freedom to be able to do whatever we wanted, but at the same time a similar feeling to skipping school when younger, not being where I was supposed to be

I think all my so called friends dropping me from one second to the next was the hardest to cope with long term.
Took forever to be able to trust people again

It's thankfully in the past, and the experience of being there, leaving, and building a new life up again has made me a stronger person I think

I do however feel disgusted by the leaders, who know very well what they are doing but keep on taking advantage of the lonely and vulnerable.

Sorry this is so long, OP
Don't mean to overtake your thread at all
Hardly ever talk about this to anyone and felt quite good writing it all down actually

OP and @Siwanator - why won't you mention their names? Surely it could help others to be warned who they are.

However
We were aware that it was seen as a cult
But the leaders told us that was the world's negative influence, basically everyone except the members would be going to hell, and worldly people were tools of the devil.
They also said in Jesus' time his movement was seen as a cult as well, so in a way being seen as a cult proved they were right.

There was more reasoning/preaching behind this, but can't remember it all

It sounds absolutely mad reading what I just wrote myself. Took it as truth back then though.

I know people probably mean well but please don't feel obliged to share the names of the cults you have left, it's totally understandable if you don't feel comfortable doing so.

If someone writes about an experience with an abusive ex partner then people wouldn't push them to share their name in order to warn off others, they would understand that this carries potential risk and vulnerability.

So glad that a few people now have said they managed to leave such difficult situations.

How did your cult view other religions ?

Did they all have jobs outside of the cult?

And apologies for all the spelling errors in my long post, was typing whilst setting DC and looks like auto correct had a field day

Gosh I didn't realise the Jesus Army was a cult. I had a friend in school who's family lived in a big house with them.

@Siwanator I too lost most of my friends, they tried to warn me too many times, and naturally got frustrated so distanced themselves.
I don't blame them.
I miss them terribly but I am living with the consequences of my bad choices :(

@cushioncovers jobs outside the sect were allowed as long as sundays were sacred and kept clear.
Anyone breaking this rule was made to feel like they weren't good enough or faithful enough.

Other religions were frowned upon, naturally (as with all faiths I presume?) but those from other faiths were welcomed into the building and usually the elders would ask to pray etc. If it was clear they had no interest in joining or converting they would be asked to leave.

@milliefiori I can't say for the reasons I've previously stated.

I'm sorry if this frustrates you.

@ThatCurlyGirl thank you xx

One of the big red flags for me, was when the elders would twist scripture to fit their personal beliefs.

What’s your favourite flavour of crisp?

q

@BrieandBougelet er... I like skips. You?

Have they finally given up with you now, or do they still turn up at your house?

They don't turn up anymore due to a huge altercation in the street between them and my other half.

But messages and letters keep arriving

@BatmanLovesTheCircus (see below)