Retired lap dancer- ask me anything

[yourprivatedancerEX]

It’s not something I tell new people I meet that for 10 years I used to be a very successful lap dancer. I have a very different career now but often reminisce about my secret lap dancing past, always with fond memories!
I think it’s still something that is frowned upon by many and in my view I think that’s largely down to being misunderstood. So if any of you have any questions I will answer them and hopefully give you some interesting insight into the secret world of lap dancing! Ask away.

Are you dancing right now @RatRolyPoly? 😀

I love the offence some take on MN when adult women refer to their friends as ‘girls’

Only in my mind IllHaveALarge

It was worth starting the thread purely for the reunion

Its when you casually ask your mate if they can check to make sure your tampon string isn't out, you know you've made friends for life

I think " the girls" is often used to women who work in the adult entertainment industry and also beauty salons.

@StripStripHooray that's hilarious! 😂😂

I have a question

Why is it called "lap" dancing if there is no touching ? I have always wondered this

Good god @StripStripHooray you'll get the mooncup brigade invading this thread now!

Strip you've reminded me, once when I'd cut my string too short and what with my stupid long acrylics I couldn't get the bugger out again! I was wearing a yellow thong so I couldn't just leave it there and risk leaking... One of the other girls (hero that she was) said that with a glass of wine under her belt she'd be up for lending me a hand - sisterhood! Thankfully it didn't come to that

God bless the reunion.

OP, please tell me, did you have a background in dance or just a knack for lap dancing?

Halfwitpicker no background in it, I just gave it a go and practised ALOT in the beginning until I became good at it. As mentioned up thread you end up with a lot of bruises!

The experience of my friend is much more like the experience of women interviewed in the following articles:

The clubs maintain a veneer of no touching, but touching is more standard than not," she continues. "If I had a boyfriend now and he said he was going to a lap-dancing club, I would consider it to be infidelity. The fact is that if you break the rules, you make more money. If one dancer starts breaking the rules then the pressure is on others to do the same. Otherwise a bloke would think, Well, that dancer charged me £20 and stayed three feet away, but that one charged me just the same and she put her breasts in my mouth and sat on my crotch. Once you've been there a while, you learn that certain things are profitable, and no contact is the first rule you learn to break. Eventually you start to wonder, what is the difference between me and a prostitute?

www.theguardian.com/world/2008/mar/19/gender.uk

In the two years Jennifer Hayashi Danns worked as a lap-dancer, she never met a woman who danced sober. Some took cocaine, the rest drank – whether they drove to work or not. At her worst point, Danns would have a bottle of wine before work, half a bottle while getting ready, and drink steadily through her shift. How else, she asks, could she walk up to strangers and ask if they wanted her to take her clothes off?

Then she found herself struggling to make a profit after her £80 house fee. "When the money dropped," she writes, "so did my personal standards … I went to other clubs where I performed full strip. The first time I pulled my knickers down I felt my soul fall out."

www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2011/nov/10/truth-lap-dancer-clubs

Daans wrote a book based on her experience and interviews with 300 students.

Sorry if you’ve already answered this OP but did you have a favourite make up brand that held up under the lights? Struggling to find one!! 😊 fascinating thread btw!!

Clarice I used quite a few at the time and we’re going back 10 years so may not still be the same quality etc but I used to use Mac a lot- it had good staying power.

And Dior had a really good setting spray which one spray over the top would really help hold everything in place. Not sure if they still do it, I’ve not seen it in a while.

Sorry, I don’t wear much make up these days so a bit out of practise!

anyfucker because they're sat down? Because it's the area you're closest to when dancing? Never actually thought about it myself.

Shambu and yet, I was t-total for the vast majority of when I danced. Never taken drugs either. I'd have an occasional glass of wine or champagne. If that woman had been in my club, I'd have suggested she stop dancing as it was clearly messing with her mental health. And pissed up dancers make things more dangerous for everyone.

I danced in nude clubs from day one and never felt my soul fall out of my knickers.

Mua from superdrug is very good. But I always found setting my face with hair spray did the trick.

Hi OP. Great thread, thanks for starting.

Were there any plus size dancers? If so were they popular?

Also, I always thought lap dancing was when you would literally grind and bounce on a customers lap! sorry for being naïve so you basically just dance in a sexy way Infront of them and.. jiggle? Infront of a customers face? Sorry that sounds really weird typing but always wondered!!

DH (or me) has never been to a strip club yet if he were to go, say on a stag do, what would he expect. I'd feel really uncomfortable knowing he'd gone (not that he has any plans to but does have a few stag do lined up next year so you never know) could you sort of give me a run down of what might happen... Is it just a case of him seeing girls naked? If he got a dance, what actually happen?

Oh also, sorry another question has just popped in my mind have any of the customers ever got really excited during a dance and.... You know... got a standing ovation down stairs? Would you just ignore it? Was it really embarrassing? im giggling like a school girl writing that!! Haha

Any fucker I think it’s because when lapdancing first became popular the dances used to happen in the main club area at the table where the men were sat. So effectively dancing around their tables or around their laps. It later progressed to more private booths in a separate area.

Sirlee

Sizes ranged from a very small 6 to a lovely curvy 16. There was something for everyone. Some were athletic and lean, others more voluptuous. All beautiful in their own way.

Yeh pretty much just dancing seductively. No grinding as no touching allowed.

Going on my own experiences I would say if he went in one he would experience something along the lines of:

• buys a very overpriced drink and finds a seat

• is approached by dancers who make polite chit chat before asking if he wants a dance

• if he refuses they will leave him be and maybe return later to see if he’s changed his mind or not.

• if he goes for a dance he will be led to a booth away from the main area. Although not entirely private as curtains are open and bouncers stand outside.

• he would have a 3 minute dance where the dancer ether goes topless or nude depending on the club rules and she would leave the actual reveal until the latest possible moment so the actual naked time is he last few seconds of the song only! (We’re not daft )

• the rooms are dimly lit so he will probably struggle to see much, especially after a few beers!

• then she will escort him back to his seat where his friends can grill him.

And yes it has happened but I just ignored it!

Thanks so much for answering! :)

Have we been invaded by a load of thick huns or something? What’s with all the simpering and fawning?

This is straight out of the pages of a wank mag ffs.

Sigh, I know.

Thick huns? You sound a peach. Reflects more on yourself with comments like that.
You don't have to read the thread, some of us find it interesting.

And I suspect strongly I have met some commenting on this thread who spout this same wank story whenever they can.

Clearly not happy in your own lives to have such a vile attitude towards others.