Am I being unreasonable about being offended when people think men should sit at the head of the table?

And it amazes me you think all women have been brainwashed by modern, aggressive, feminism, which is a cancer to society. Plenty of women are still excellent wives and mothers.

So the end of the table. Whats the issue.

Hey, I'm still married after 4 decades. We have two grown up successful children and two young grandchildren. We both had professional careers as well. It's possible to have both as long as you embrace a modern world that enables you to juggle tasks and support each other.

Go back to your twin tub and don't suggest that because women want equal rights they're bad parents or wives, this is simply not true.

This!
She wouldn't like me either as I'm married but not even a Mrs! Or HisLastName!!!
What utter disrespect to my Sir Husband 😄

Would I be right in thinking that the kind of MIL who ensures that her precious big boy gets the special seat at the head of the table is also the one struggling to carry his overflowing banqueting plate to the table, whilst the women all get a couple of slivers of meat scraps and half a small potato, "Because we're watching our weight, aren't we?" ?

And plenty of men are excellent husbands and fathers. There seems to be an awful lot of "man hate" on MN. Shrieking about where someone sits at a table. Seriously?

Hey, I'm still married after 4 decades. We have two grown up successful children and two young grandchildren. We both had professional careers as well. It's possible to have both as long as you embrace a modern world that enables you to juggle tasks and support each other.

Go back to your twin tub and don't suggest that because women want equal rights they're bad parents or wives, this is simply not true.

I’m also assuming the precious head of the table doesn’t have to cook either

I’m also assuming the precious head of the table doesn’t have to cook either

Yes, I definitely don’t like that. Very proud to be a Mrs and have the same name as my husband and children, proud to be associated with them instead of making such a petty and childish point. So immature.

Oh yes, I'm such an immature professional Ms MyName, especially at the age of 46.
You've got be to pulling our chains here as surely nobody bows down to the patriarchy to the extent you do in real life?!
And if you are legit, you are simply supporting my feminist stance and not detracting from it so thanks for that 😀
PS. My husband does nearly all of the cooking in my house, and also does all of the packed lunches. He's a legend 🌟

Ms sounds horrendous as a title. Poor husband! You don’t really want equality, or you’d make his lunch half the time. Poor bloke! I can’t believe some men put up with this.

@NimbleTaupeTiger He's having us on 😀

Actually in the 50s twin tubs were a luxury and many women were washing by hand. I remember a single tub and a mangle in the early 70s, shortly before my mum got an automatic washing machine.

When he puts the bins out and paints the ceiling 😄
I'm guessing you don't want equality then?

And plenty of men are excellent husbands and fathers. There seems to be an awful lot of "man hate" on MN. Shrieking about where someone sits at a table. Seriously?

I put my arm through a mangle as a toddler in the 70s. I was wearing a bracelet. Still got the scar to this day

I’d be appalled if my husband didn’t put the bins out.

I’d be appalled if my husband didn’t put the bins out.

Assuming you're genuine, could you tell us how much experience you have of the life you're describing? Have you ever earned money? Have you been brought up doing your dad's laundry and your brothers laundry, doing all the cooking and the dishes while they watch the football on TV? Seeing your brothers get fed first, and fed more, and getting the second helpings of the food you cooked? Has your husband decided it's not in your best interest to do something that you really want to do? Has he ever, when speaking for you, said something you disagree with, and how did you feel/ what did you? Is it just husband you'd defer to, or father/ brother/uncle as well? What would the consequence be if you went against what they decided?

The reason I'm asking is because I think you're romanticising or even sexualizing a lifestyle you don't really understand, and I think it's naïve and possibly risky to do that.

So I’ve done the whole university and career thing for years, I actually earned more, split all chores equally at the weekend. It’s overrated. I massively prefer a more traditional set up, as now our evenings and weekends are entirely free. We are both clear on who does what and both have loads of free time to pursue hobbies, go out with friends and family separately and together, and basically have a life where not every minute is either kids or work for both of us. I certainly don’t want 1 1/2-2 jobs!

So I’ve done the whole university and career thing for years, I actually earned more, split all chores equally at the weekend. It’s overrated. I massively prefer a more traditional set up, as now our evenings and weekends are entirely free. We are both clear on who does what and both have loads of free time to pursue hobbies, go out with friends and family separately and together, and basically have a life where not every minute is either kids or work for both of us. I certainly don’t want 1 1/2-2 jobs!

Yeah, I totally get why you'd want only one parent in work - of course that means there's more time for both of you to do other things. It's the other stuff I was curious about - the sexual gratification you get from the idea of what a man sitting at the head of the table implies etc etc.

I did get the impression you'd "done the whole university and career thing". No judgement either way, btw. But I do still get the sense that you like the trad-wife vibes (which is understandable - they have a very pretty aesthetic), but haven't really been in a home or culture where men decide most of what happens in your life.

Would you be able to answer my other questions? I'm not trying to be goady - I'm interested in how much of your life actually is controlled by men. Your current set up, being a SAHM, of course has nothing to do with that, especially since, with your previous career, you could easily opt out again.