Don’t want my 16 year old here anymore.

He may in the eyes of the law be a child, but he's not far off being an adult and OP has younger children she also has to care for. Does his "right" as a member of the family over rule the rights of the other children to a safe, violence free upbringing?

What's your suggestion - let him stay until he injures or kills one of the siblings? Keep watching everything you care for, all your belongings and that of the other children, be destroyed because you didn't pander to his desires? Be open to being assaulted yourself, just because you couldn't afford to pay for everything he's demanding?

To be part of a family, you should recognise that others have rights and needs. Being abusive either verbally or physically if you aren't put first all the time isn't the actions of a family member, it's the actions of a despot and in my mind should give up the rights of family.

Safety of the many outnumbers the wants of the few.

My suggestion is that parents don't get to opt out of parenting their children. Everyone here us very keen to blame this child for the family difficulties, but he's a child responding to the situation he's in.

In terms of what else there is to do? Use the police for support. Refer to early help teams with social services. Ideally try to join a course on PACE-based parenting. Work actively on the relationship. Ask social services to refer to a family group conference team to see who can support.

What I don't believe parents can ethically do is walk away from their child.

Would you advocate that at other ages too? Should parents get rid of a toddler that's biting siblings? Or, should they perhaps look for ways to support all the children.

I feel sorry for this boy. I suspect he knows he isn't wanted. How can anyone expect his behaviour to change when he's sitting with that?

OP has tried all of those except calling the police out on him - she's attended parenting courses, and despite contacting Social Services in the past they've done nothing. She's tried communicating to work on the relationship, but he won't respond. This has been going on for 6 years and escalating whatever she tries to do, when does the line get drawn?

Not every child or young adult who misbehaves does so because of a parenting failure. The influence of their peers and things they read on the internet can overcome that upbringing especially in these social media filled days.

How utterly ridiculous about the toddler. Can't you see the difference between a three year old and a sixteen year old?

The strength?

Since it needs pointing out, one of them is small and if absolutely necessary, can be gently restrained physically. The other can smash things up, including parent and siblings, and the only answer is the police.

The OP has been to Social Services, has been to parenting classes, has tried to put parenting strategies in place.

Any other suggestions? Preferably intelligent ones that don't re-repeat what the OP has already stated she's tried?

Perhaps if you feel sorry enough for the boy, you could offer to take him in. A strong external mentor can often help a difficult teen a great deal - you'd be ideal, I'm sure.

Definitely phone the police next time he is violent and let them come and speak with him. Tell them you are scared and your younger children need protecting.
I Would phone the bank and find out how to stop him using your account for his gaming, or anything else. All banks have a safeguarding team.
There is supervised accommodation available, for 16 year olds, which I think is your answer here. The police can refer you to social services and get the ball rolling.
I would contact the school of your younger children and explain the situation. They can involve multi agencies to help you. Your younger children are very vulnerable.
i wish you all the very best. Start tomorrow and focus on yourself and your other children. Your son is under 18, but he needs to understand that enough is enough and his actions have consequences.

I understood =)