AIBU to think not every school issue should be labelled SEN?

I've been teaching for a long time now. There are many issues.

The demands of the curriculum, school timetabling, school day are unmanageable for a lot of children SEND or not. Schools can't/won't do much about that.

Both parents working full time, the impact of that on wider family support (eg grandparents, aunts, uncles etc also working full time and reduced capacity for support). Schools can't do much about that.

Changes in parenting approaches and the the effects of that. Schools can't do anything about that.

Use of screen time in homes for whatever reason and the impact of that. Schools can't do anything about that.

Some children with 'low level' autism and ADHD who would have coped in school 30+ years ago (like me, for example) and flown under the radar now don't because of increased demands.

School funding cuts meaning fewer resources (human and physical) which leads to a teacher in a class of 30 with 1/5 significant SEND needs (eg complex behavioural needs; significant cognition amd learning needs; reduced capacity to meet the needs). And variable responses to SEND needs in the classroom based on individual teachers knowledge, experience and expertise.

Higher expectations/demands on teachers and children overall - some of which are unrealistic.

Punitive responses to school absence.

Ineffective mainstream inclusion policies and strategies and children who would genuinely benefit from specialised provision being denied access to it due to funding spaces.

The negatives impact of the Local Offer approach to funding SEND.

The impact of these can cause very unsettled and chaotic homelives for children and create issues that mimic SEND. Especially with regards to ND traits. But no one has the means or capacity to address these, certainly not individual schools.

They do, in effect create 'special (or additional) educational needs' in some children that aren't related to a diagnosable condition and who wouldn't be diagnosed with anything but do present with behaviours that make it difficult for teachers to teach and for themselves and others to learn. They just have a different root cause. Eg trauma responses can manifest in ways that look like adhd and autism to a non specialist observer. (The Coventry Grid exists for this reason).

Not all strategies that work with ND children work because the root cause is different. But schools defer to 'possible SEND' because it's easier.

Eg I taught a child a couple of years ago who we knew was living in a misogynistic, hyper masculine DV environment and his behaviours reflected that. This was rejected as the reason for his behaviour, and I was asked if I thought he had ADHD and given a pair of ear defenders for him to use. Because schools have ear defenders but they don't generally have strategies for dealing with traumatised children.

Inclusion on the scale that has been forced on schools and children just isn't sustainable- every child is suffering.

There has been an erosion imo of what is considered part of the usual human condition mind you. Everyone has quirks, but people are quick to label it SEN. This also damages those with genuine additional needs, similar to someone experiencing an expected human reaction to a stressful event claiming they have anxiety when they have are just human which has led to less understanding of the extent someone with anxiety struggles.

Exactly, we're social tribal animals and we're deviating further away from our development in that regard and forgetting the community and group, we've become individualistic and it's bad for us

100% agreed.
And so many of these threads assume that the parents of SEN children want them to be in a mainstream school environment. We’ve fought for 3 years to get my son moved to a specialist placement… the local authority agree that it’s what he requires, but there are no places. Yet the parents seem to be blamed for their child being there. Trust me, I never wanted my son in a mainstream school where he was bullied due to his disability, but I didn’t have a choice.

Without ear defenders my 7 year old son is so distressed he self harms. No, he might not get them in the ‘real world’, but as his disability is so severe that he’s never likely to live an independent life anyway, I’d far rather reduce the stress on him now.

There has been an erosion imo of what is considered part of the usual human condition mind you. Everyone has quirks, but people are quick to label it SEN. This also damages those with genuine additional needs, similar to someone experiencing an expected human reaction to a stressful event claiming they have anxiety when they have are just human which has led to less understanding of the extent someone with anxiety struggles.

Very much this, too.

Strategies used with children with SEND such as seeing behaviour as communication work well with children without SEND.

This is all absolutely true. I have one child who has both autism and adhd diagnosis, but it took three years and we are still waiting for medication.

The school made the reasonable adjustments she needed but also held her accountable for the at times ridiculous behaviour. Multiple suspensions and sanctions have been applied when appropriate. We have always supported the school with this.

Where it falls apart is when parents don't parent, because kids with issues still need routines and boundaries. SEN should not be an excuse for unacceptable behaviour. If a child is completely unable to moderate their behaviour or cope in mainstream, they shouldn't be there.

They do. Along with calmer environments, predictable routines, consistency, fewer transitions, scaffolding, reduced cognitive load etc, it benefits all children. That's what they mean when they say 'what's good for SEND is good for all.

Not that a pair of ear defenders will cure all ills.

And some schools treat all strategies as a 'if you do X, there will no longer be an issue. If there is still an issue, it's the teacher's fault'.

No, they will hand you a 'standing desk' or specialist chair if you are office based.

Or if you know you struggle to sit still for extended periods (like me), you can chose a job which is more active, you try your best to make your life meet your needs. Adults may wear noise cancelling headphones, or those in ear noise filters (i forget the name). Children don't always have this option - as adults we have a lot more choices, and can use this positively to try to meet our individual needs, as we are all different.

As parents we know our children best - I did send in a wobble cushion for my daughter as it helps her and doesn't harm anyone else. We walk the long way to school, and she runs and jumps to get her 'wiggles' out before we get there. We give lots of tight hugs to try to regulate her. We prep everything the night before so not to have to rush which destabalises her. I am responsible to making sure my daughter is ready to learn when she gets to school, and this isn't just the right uniform, it's good sleep, a good breakfast, and all the sensory strategies above. However, all this means school thinks she is fine, they don't see all the prep which goes into getting her to school calm, so they have no concerns.

My observation is the kids are usually very like their parents and yet parents expect them to be better, do better at school. Of course there are exceptions. However the kids I know who prefer to stay in their room gaming - guess what, that’s what dad does too. The kid who isn’t doing well in a levels - well dad didn’t do a levels either but mum expects it. Sticking a label on this helps in one away as we understand our adult selves better. But it’s not for schools to fix every ‘problem’. Sometimes a kid needs a different path than a parent might expect, or dream of.

This is so sad

Disagree about adjustments, plenty of adults wear loops or similar where I work for similar reasons and doesnt affect anyone else. I imagine schools are challenging envrionments for a lot of children with sensory issues etc, and environments they wont choose to be a part of as adults (30 plus people in a fairly confined space with mountains of expectations); in fact the majority of adults work in environments much different to this. I suspect supporting children to adapt is best done at home with the people who know them best and understand their limitations; whilst as with any parents some SEN parents do their children a disservice by being lazy, the majority want the best for them and work hard to support them.

Agree with the rest though.

This isn’t always true. I have 5 DC. I have a PhD and DH an MBA so I’d say we’re pretty academic, I am quite literally an academic. 4/5 of DC are also academic but 1 child just isn’t at all. We’re forking out £70 PW in tutors to hopefully get her a pass in English and maths.

The way I see intelligence is some people are academic, some technical and some creative with some a nice mix of two or three of those if very fortunate. It’s mostly genetic. My mum is like DD, they’re both very technical hands on people but struggle academically. There isn’t anything wrong with this, it’s a good thing to be frank. The whole world would grind to a halt if filled with academics, trust me, I work with enough of them…

It's a total Emporers New Clothes situation in education atm with everyone playing along for fear that it will affect their career (which it 100% would) if they try to push back.

I eventually got tired with the SEN, SEN, SEN focus in my primary school and left. Its all that matters. By the time they got to y6, we had made a third of those kids totally pathetic, anxious, neurotic and unable to perform simple tasks alone or attempt something new. They learn pretty quickly that it's fine to refuse to do stuff. In fact, it might get you some special treatment.

We are totally falling them by pandering to whatever condition they claim to have. I dread to think what's coming down the tracks for you.

Yeah, two things can be true at the same time.

I do think better recognition of SEND and curiosity to look at what’s behind the behaviour are good things.

But, there is almost a bit of an obsession with it, particularly among some sections of SEND parents, and I don’t think it helps. In fact I think it dilutes the message that people really need to be hearing which is that too many SEND children are not getting their needs met and that this includes children with no school place at all - sometimes for many years - and children suffering tangible harm in unsuitable settings. The school dinners thing being a good example of this.

I have two children with significant SEND needs - complex autism and other ND + varied physical/medical needs. But, both are extremely bright and therefore really don’t fit anywhere in the system. Both have a history of lashing out and/or eloping when in severe distress due to unmet needs, but when needs are met don’t display challenging behaviours at all. One is in an independent special school for “academically able” children (but which is still nothing like mainstream in terms of academic offer) and child is really still “too able” for, but at least happy and settled unlike the mainstream they were in before which was miserable. One is really very highly complex and always been on an EOTAS package, never been to school.

Neither could eat school dinners due to dietary restrictions associated with medical needs before we even add on the sensory-based restrictive eating one struggles with. Children with medical needs like this are never considered and it’s just expected they’ll take lunch and nobody sees this as a hardship as long as it doesn’t affect them - other “autism mums” often just shrug if I mention this kind of thing. I found it frustrating to see the posts about the school dinner changes just full of comments such as “my autistic child wouldn’t eat any of that”.

It’s like autism is the only SEND (don’t get me started on that tangent!) and nobody should try and do better for most children because what about the autistic children. And given the current crisis in the system and the catastrophic reforms proposed by this government (I mean, neither of my children would ever have received any education without their legal rights - tribunal had to force our LA to provide) it just feels like a distraction from the real issues and it’s also feeding the narrative about greedy SEND parents who want the whole world to change just for their child, who want every single thing centred around their autistic child. Healthier school meals are a positive thing and some (note: SOME) autistic children might be better eaters if given healthy whole foods from the beginning!

You’re totally right.

I often feel the same on posts where the poster is worried about their university age child not being supported enough. This isn’t the real world.

Why is there age relevant? Children under 10
have SEN too.
My son is 7. Diagnosed with autism at 3. It was agreed before he even started school that he wouldn’t cope in mainstream, but there were no SEN placements available to him. 3 years later, there still aren't.
I know his teachers in mainstream school don’t want him there, trust me you all make it obvious that accommodating the needs of children with disabilities is an inconvenience. But what the fuck else can I do?