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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

What can I spend my new fortune on?

124 replies

RamsayBoltonsConscience · 05/08/2026 16:09

My ex paid very little child maintenance. Was on the fiddle with his boss to only pay £5 a week. He had over £2000 arrears.
Additionally, no one has set eyes on this piece of 💩in over 10 years including his children. I seriously considered that he may have died during COVID.
I am a petty bitch so wouldn’t let the the CMS close my account when my son turned 19. This morning I received a text to say a payment had been made to my account.
£15.65 a month will be paid to me starting this month. It will take him 10 years to pay off the arrears, I will be retired by the time it is cleared, he will be 70.
I would have loved to have seen his face when he saw the benefit reduction due to CMS arrears. Every month, I am going to spend that £15 on something ridiculous- suggestions please!

OP posts:
wojono · 05/08/2026 17:19

I would either save it all every month and then use it towards a really nice holiday to celebrate your retirement or I'd save it and take the money out each year for a special day trip or activity you've always wanted to do.
Or put it into premium bonds and you might get lucky.

I wouldn't spend it on something daft and trivial each month, but that's just me.
Still, I'd be tempted by the adopt a cockroach mentioned upthread though! So maybe do that with the first month's and then start being sensible!

Minasama · 05/08/2026 17:22

What a pathetic excuse of a man. I would save it for my child.

outerspacepotato · 05/08/2026 17:25

Buy a bag of fancy potatoes and cook up your favorite spud dish. And the lottery ticket.

Bjorkdidit · 05/08/2026 17:26

wojono · 05/08/2026 17:19

I would either save it all every month and then use it towards a really nice holiday to celebrate your retirement or I'd save it and take the money out each year for a special day trip or activity you've always wanted to do.
Or put it into premium bonds and you might get lucky.

I wouldn't spend it on something daft and trivial each month, but that's just me.
Still, I'd be tempted by the adopt a cockroach mentioned upthread though! So maybe do that with the first month's and then start being sensible!

But realistically, £2k isn't likely to make a huge difference to the OP in 10 years time. If she's skint enough for it to make a difference, all it will likely achieve will make her ineligible for pension credit.

She'll have a lot more fun buying 120 daft things over the next 10 years. The 'buy whatever he thought was a waste of money' is a good idea.

Tallestone · 05/08/2026 17:29

I wound up my ex so much it was so funny. He paid maintenance very rarely and I think was about 15 a month. When my child was an adult the CSA said they'd made a mistake with the calculations and I was owed 200. They asked if I wanted to claim it and I said yes I knew he would go mad.

They had ann attacment of earning and i was going get the first payment soon. I didn't realise that his other ex also was owed a lot to and because she was more recent she actually had the money. He messaged me going mad that he was going to come around and get the 30 back

he lives miles away so I wasn't worried. I said you're going to drive miles for £30 if course you're not.He was saying that the money had to be spent on the child and I said you can't tell me what to do with my money just to wind him up. It was glorious even though I didn't get the money.

Breadcat24 · 05/08/2026 17:32

@RamsayBoltonsConscience Laughable amount.
could you treat yourself to

  1. something you do not have that you continuous give you some pleasure like Prime video or Netflix ( basic for both is £5.99)
  2. something he would really hate you getting for yourself -maybe he hated you to pamper yourself and you could buy a nice scented moisturiser like a gift set
https://www.boots.com/sanctuary-spa-signature-minis-gift-set-10330383 £8.33 every now and again. or if he hated something like fish but you love it some nice food

or send him something he will hate like a subscription to Country life?

Boreded · 05/08/2026 17:34

Ovoemconserva · 05/08/2026 17:14

Can you send a glitter parcel to him?

This is my favourite suggestion of all time

Specialagentblond · 05/08/2026 17:35

I’d do something with my child once a month.

Ovoemconserva · 05/08/2026 17:42

Breadcat24 · 05/08/2026 17:32

@RamsayBoltonsConscience Laughable amount.
could you treat yourself to

  1. something you do not have that you continuous give you some pleasure like Prime video or Netflix ( basic for both is £5.99)
  2. something he would really hate you getting for yourself -maybe he hated you to pamper yourself and you could buy a nice scented moisturiser like a gift set
https://www.boots.com/sanctuary-spa-signature-minis-gift-set-10330383 £8.33 every now and again. or if he hated something like fish but you love it some nice food

or send him something he will hate like a subscription to Country life?

Erectile dysfunction magazine.

ClairDeLaLune · 05/08/2026 17:42

RamsayBoltonsConscience · 05/08/2026 16:20

A solid idea, I may move to this eventually. I saw somewhere that you could buy a cockroach, name it as your ex and have it fed to animals at a zoo, think it was in the US though…

Show quote history

😂😂😂 brilliant OP, and very well written

Hereagain334 · 05/08/2026 17:43

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Boreded · 05/08/2026 17:45
  1. sponsor a stupid animal - not something cool, think pigeon or goat, do a new random one every month to create your own Noah’s ark
  2. pay a busker to play a song he hated
  3. create a collection that you showcase, maybe a fun rubber duck, and every month you get a new one and the collection grows so you can laugh about how much he is wasting and how long it is going on for.
Original poster
RamsayBoltonsConscience · 05/08/2026 17:45

Some fantastic ideas. Just for clarity, the ‘child’ is now 27 living independently with his partner. I have been through the mill financially and the money would have made a difference back in the day but I am fortunate enough to have a good job with solid pay and will finish paying my mortgage next year so really don’t need the money. (That doesn’t mean that I won’t take it though!) Like I said, I AM a petty bitch and am not going to let him off. I will definitely squander the money for a while and then will save it for a really nice holiday somewhere he would never have wanted to go.

OP posts:
Original poster
RamsayBoltonsConscience · 05/08/2026 17:46

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You are a real charmer…

OP posts:
PiffleWiffleWoozle · 05/08/2026 17:48

Premium bonds? Like lottery but you get to keep it. Or put in pension invested in global tracker - will get tax back and growth then blow it on a massive holiday.

MySneakyLion · 05/08/2026 17:50

BauhausOfEliott · 05/08/2026 17:08

Ideally you should definitely have the joy of spending it on something ridiculous and frivolous that you will genuinely appreciate and enjoy. But if you can't think something every month, you could always make the odd donation to a charity you know he'd hate. Years ago, I once won £20 from a man who was very pro-hunting and pro-shooting (long story) and I made a point of giving it to the League Against Cruel Sports. And telling him.

Love this!

Original poster
RamsayBoltonsConscience · 05/08/2026 17:52

Ovoemconserva · 05/08/2026 17:42

Erectile dysfunction magazine.

Show quote history

That’s amazing!

OP posts:
Original poster
RamsayBoltonsConscience · 05/08/2026 17:53

Boreded · 05/08/2026 17:45

  1. sponsor a stupid animal - not something cool, think pigeon or goat, do a new random one every month to create your own Noah’s ark
  2. pay a busker to play a song he hated
  3. create a collection that you showcase, maybe a fun rubber duck, and every month you get a new one and the collection grows so you can laugh about how much he is wasting and how long it is going on for.

My own Noah’s Ark! 😂 😂😂

OP posts:
MySneakyLion · 05/08/2026 17:53

This reply has been deleted

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Pathetic. Just pathetic.

Sausagedogsarethewurst · 05/08/2026 17:58

Boreded · 05/08/2026 17:45

  1. sponsor a stupid animal - not something cool, think pigeon or goat, do a new random one every month to create your own Noah’s ark
  2. pay a busker to play a song he hated
  3. create a collection that you showcase, maybe a fun rubber duck, and every month you get a new one and the collection grows so you can laugh about how much he is wasting and how long it is going on for.

I’d use it to sponsor a child for the irony that that is what it was meant to be for all those years ago. Random animals might be funny but this might hit harder.

PyongyangKipperbang · 05/08/2026 18:00

KojaksLollipop · 05/08/2026 16:50

Loads of men complain their money is just getting spent on their exes getting their nails done, so do that at least once!

Yeah I was about to post this, you have to do it at least once and maybe post on SM in the hope it gets back to him!

ChocolateCinderToffee · 05/08/2026 18:02

I would honestly put it in a separate savings account and in ten years' time have a holiday somewhere good.

Jimjiminee · 05/08/2026 18:04

Pension

iwishtoo · 05/08/2026 18:04

RamsayBoltonsConscience · 05/08/2026 17:45

Some fantastic ideas. Just for clarity, the ‘child’ is now 27 living independently with his partner. I have been through the mill financially and the money would have made a difference back in the day but I am fortunate enough to have a good job with solid pay and will finish paying my mortgage next year so really don’t need the money. (That doesn’t mean that I won’t take it though!) Like I said, I AM a petty bitch and am not going to let him off. I will definitely squander the money for a while and then will save it for a really nice holiday somewhere he would never have wanted to go.

I'm glad you are taking the money. I'd spend it on something frivolous for the first six months and then put it into premium bonds and once he's repaid it all have a holiday 😁

Daisymail · 05/08/2026 18:06

PerkingFaintly · 05/08/2026 16:34

Combine the above Lottery and investment ideas by buying Premium Bonds.

This!