I can't stand my new home

@WannabeWriter1988 Is this going to be a long term home, or will you be able to move somewhere or to something you would like in 5 years?
In the mean time, could you plant some trees and shrubs into your garden to shield the neighbours and bring in wildlife?
My garden has a very imposing block of flats at the end, only two storeys, but the one that looks over our garden has a balcony. It should have been a Juliette balcony but somehow they built it without anyone noticing and by the time we moved in it had been in over 7 years and there is nothing that can be done about it now. The flat has had various occupants over the 10 years we've been here, one was particularly annoying and liked to broadcast his phone conversations for the whole neighbourhood to hear. Anyway, we have planted trees to block the view from the balcony into our garden and also into our dds bedroom and it is heaven now.

Presumably you’re renting, so can you look for another rental that feels more comfortable for you?

it is always unsettling to move to a new place. i found the first 2 weeks in a new house very confusing.

but you can make the new place yours. think of one or two simple things you can do to claim the space - a small plant in a pot, a bird bath for the birds - once you get started, any space can become nice.

how about putting up fabrics / shade sails so you don't feel you are in a fish bowl and have a private space with a variety of colours?

Yanbu. I grew up in rural Wiltshire, moved to Warwick to be with ex and hated every second of it. It was never dark, never quiet or still. Endless planes and lorries. When I asked where I could go for a walk in woodland I was told to drive 17 miles! It was horrendous. I called where we lived the exercise yard.
I lasted 12 months and ended up on ADs, which I dumped the day I left (escaped). Some people just need space & green, and the midlands is definitely not my natural environment.

Can you improve your space? Fill your garden with shrubs and bird boxes? Build a pond? Shut out the noisy neighbours? At least you are only renting and can move fairly easily.

It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks except you and your partner - stop asking others for their opinions.

personally, I couldn’t live somewhere like this, I need space around me and to not feel crammed in so totally understand this, but not everyone feels the same - which is ok, all that matters is what you and your partner want.

Why didn't your partner take account of your feelings before even moving into this place?
Did you have no say at all in the matter?

Have you moved into a prison?
You are sounding a bit melodramatic about it, as I simply can’t imagine everything you are describing!

What do you mean, no sunshine? That would be a deal breaker for me, possibly even a relationship ender. You can't live where you are genuinely depressed and for your partner to expect it is unreasonable.

Respectfully, why did you put in an offer on a house you hated from the moment you saw it? Are you in an abusive relationship?

Are you now closer to your family, or his?

Your family thinking you are silly is a bit weird. À collusion against you having a mind and feelings of your own? Did you join in with the self - discounting when you agreed to move there?

Time to get a credible voice, for yourself to hear, as well as those around you.

Absolutely this. Trust your own judgement, and advocate for your own wishes. Nobody else has to live in this house. No one else needs to have an opinion on what it's like to live there. My mother married into a house she absolutely hated, and still hates, and has now lived there for almost sixty years.

It sounds like others are minimising your feelings and opinions. That is the problem.
Please don't allow others to do this. They've told you you are silly and selfish. For having an opinion. Find your inner strength, and make a plan to find somewhere to live that YOU like. Not your family. YOU.

How long are you tied in for? Did you insist on a break clause? I’d give it a few months, but the lack of space would make me go stir crazy.

I had zero connection to my current house for months, I felt quite sad, but we’ve ended up here for over 20 years. I think it was a lot to do with having escaped an aggressive druggy neighbour who made our life hell and we bought a tiny 2 up 2 down and stayed for a year. It was blissful, silent, lovely neighbours, but when we saw this house, it just made sense. 🤷‍♀️

Get some blinds/blackout curtains or find somewhere else to rent.

It sounds like a lovely house in a poor position. You'll probably find the colder months lovely.

I'd be putting up a pegoda with real or fake trellis and trees in half whiskey barrels.

You should not have agreed to live there and need to look into moving if you're still unhappy in the future but make sure you have an idea of where rather than just complaining about your current house. Can you actually find an area you can afford and like and is good for work /school/family.

OK, that’s interesting as I was expecting you to say that he had forced you further away from yours. Did you grow up in the area where you now live? Your family sound quite mean and dismissive of you, do you actually want to be closer to them? Did you feel more freedom when they were further away?

OK, so you are the person who overruled your own preferences, ultimately, by deciding other people's opinions outweighed your own. Why? Is this something you do a lot?