A bit of background. DP and I are in our 50s. We have a good business together but live apart. We have been together for a long time, well over 10 years.
He wouldn't move into my previous house because he didn't like the area and he won't move in with me now because 'I might throw him out'. I've inherited my parents' house where I currently live - large detached on a big plot. He's wanted me to sell this ever since they died and get a place together in a different area. I'm not keen because we've split up twice, his house is small and dilapidated and I like my house and area.
I've started renovating my house as it needs a lot of work. DP used to be a builder/plasterer years ago and is very skilled and knowledgeable. He has done work for me on a rental property in the past and I paid him.
However, he said he wont help with my house renovation because there's 'nothing in it for him', it would just increase the value of my property and I won't sell it anyway. I might sell sometime but surely thats up to me. I'm in no rush.
I've painted the outside, with DP help for which I paid him 2/3 of the going rate. I guess he did this for the money I've replaced the windows. But from then on, its been a nightmare. Cowboy builders and a half finished small extension. I've left that till the weather improves and started on the inside. I've just had a stud wall done by a carpenter and that's not up standard.
Honestly I am so pissed off and upset that DP can watch me struggling and losing money when he could help me. What a contrast to the way he treats other people - helping friends with cheap jobs, running around for weeks trying to find and pay for a bloody car for his married, adult daughter. She only has to click her fingers and Daddy comes running. But he can listen to me crying on the phone and say 'well tradesmen don't give a shit about you'.
I'm seriously worried I'm just going to go through money as its so so hard to find decent tradesmen. I've got one and he won't help me. I'm in despair. AIBU?
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
DP happy to sit back and struggle with house renovation
PandoraRocks · 21/01/2021 13:38
This reply has been deleted
Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.