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Why Zombie is Zombie - the backstory

(183 Posts)
IamtheZombie Mon 30-Dec-13 17:59:14

Zombie is periodically asked what her backstory is and why she speaks in the third person. Bits of the story are scattered around various parts of the site (as are a few of her limbs). The story is fairly long and a bit complicated. She's therefore putting this thread here so she can simply refer people to it rather than trying to tell it all again.

She has found 2 posts that between them tell pretty much the whole story.

The first one is her initial reply on a Zombie appreciation thread started by slatternlymother in September 2012. The second one is the OP of a thread Zombie started in September 2013 which brings the story pretty much up to date.

IamtheZombie Mon 30-Dec-13 17:59:53

IamtheZombie Sun 16-Sep-12 12:59:41

Oh, gosh. blush blush blush

Zombie did not expect to ever see a thread like this. She hardly knows what to say. She does realise that, as Worra said, some people are annoyed by her posting style. She will therefore now step out of character to answer your questions.

Once upon a time I was a relatively boring MN poster. I used to enjoy the OFRS threads and one day I thought that having a "real" zombie join them might add a new dimension. Thus IamtheZombie was born. I chose to have her post in the third person for a couple of reasons. First, it would instantly set her apart from the real people. Second, I figured that a zombie would be a bit confused as to whether she was the person she used to be or was really a zombie. Third person speak was my way of trying to show this confusion.

For several months I used my normal nickname for most of my posts and only changed to Zombie to play on relevant threads.

Then, last November, life went tits up. Actually what I mean by that is that it went tit off. I was diagnosed with an aggressive breast cancer. I had a mastectomy in November. In December I learned that although the surgery had been a complete success in that they were as sure as they could be that they had removed all the active cancer (lymph nodes clear, no vascular invasion and a clear margin around the tumours), because the tumours were so aggressive (and were hormone positive and HER2+), I would need the full spectrum of adjuvant therapies.

At this point, Zombie started to become part of my coping mechanism. She provided a harmless distraction from what was going on in RL.

I had chemotherapy from mid-January to early May. I had radiotherapy from late May to mid-June. In July I started an 18 cycle course of Herceptin which I will finish next July. I am also on Arimidex for 5 years. Arimidex can potentiate osteoporosis so I also have to take other medications to try and counter that possibility.

By late January / early February I had abandoned by other nickname and was a full time Zombie. This year I have also lost my MIL in April and more recently my Godson whose funeral I attended last week. Zombie is my lifeline at times.

As to who I am in RL... I'm 60 years old. I'm married with 2 adult DSDs. I enjoy MN for the mixture of fun and frivolity; for the serious debates that can be had; and most of all for the care and compassion that can be found here.

IamtheZombie Mon 30-Dec-13 18:00:55

Reports of Zombie's demise...
Add message | Report | Message poster
IamtheZombie Mon 30-Sep-13 16:56:52

have been greatly exaggerated. She may be a wee bit battered and bruised, but she bends and doesn't break.

Most of you probably know her back story but, for those who don't, here's a very brief recap:

The last 2 1/2 years have been absolutely horrendous: family crises, a breast cancer diagnosis and 20 months of treatment for that, bereavements and sorting out her late MIL's estate. As you can imagine, she found it a struggle at times.

Just under a year ago, DZOH began an "inappropriate" on-line relationship with a woman he "met" playing scrabble on Facebook. At the time he was spending most of his time at his mum's house in Nottingham sorting things out and putting it on the market. The on-line relationship fairly quickly progressed to a full blown physical affair. The woman lives in Wales and he would pay her train fare to come to Nottingham to see him. Zombie was fully aware of everything that was going on and tried to do everything she could to save her marriage. He left Zombie in mid-February, first staying in Nottingham before moving in with her in mid-March. He continued to come back to DDS to take Zombie to her hospital treatments. In mid-May he started making reference to coming back to her. He finally did so in mid-August. Two weeks after he came back they went to Kos for a fortnight. Halfway through the holiday he told her that he was leaving as soon as they returned to the UK. Which he duly did on Friday, 13th September.

Zombie went through all the trauma, drama and devastation between October and August. That is behind her. She's relieved that that it is finally over. A few nights ago she realised that she was sitting here completely relaxed and smiling for no reason. It's as though an enormous weight has been lifted from her.

She's currently packing up his belongings, deciding what she needs to replace, etc. He will come with a man and a van in a few weeks time to remove everything. There are obviously other pracicalities to be sorted out but they are doing so in as amicable a manner as possible.

Can Zombie please ask those of you who are Facebook friends with her NOT to say anything publicly on there about any of this.

Onwards and upwards. wink

KepekCrumbs Mon 30-Dec-13 18:05:26

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

headlesslambrini Mon 30-Dec-13 18:06:35

you are and always will be Zombie to me.

HankyScore Mon 30-Dec-13 18:07:42

Zombie is one of my faves and I loved meeting her a while back.


sunbathe Mon 30-Dec-13 18:09:44

That's a whole lot of stuff to go through, Zombie.

Wishing you lots of good things in future. flowers

MurderOfGoths Mon 30-Dec-13 18:10:53

Sorry to hear you've been through all that Zombie, I'm impressed that through it all you've still been a source of cheerfulness on MN, I know that I'm always pleased to spot one of your posts as they often bring a smile. Hope life brings your more smiles too.

SunshineOnACrappyDay Mon 30-Dec-13 18:13:56

Zombie, I've seen you about the site and wondered about your moniker.

All the best flowers

80sdrummer Mon 30-Dec-13 18:17:29

Zombie I luffs you

DramaAlpaca Mon 30-Dec-13 18:18:37

Zombie I love your distinctive posting style & your advice is always pertinent & wise. Don't ever change, you are very special to MN.

I'm sorry you've been through such a tough time & I hope the future is bright flowers

ThreeWisePerpendicularVinces Mon 30-Dec-13 18:20:47

I've often wondered Zombie and never wanted to ask - best wishes to you. It sounds like you've dealt with an awful lot with dignity flowers.

LiberalLibertine Mon 30-Dec-13 18:20:56

Glad your smiling for no reason zombie onwards and upwards indeed smile

LiberalLibertine Mon 30-Dec-13 18:21:23


Fedupnagging Mon 30-Dec-13 18:23:24

I like the way you post Zombie - took a little while initially as wondered if you were 'real' iyswim. But I soon realised I like what you say and how you say it.

Iam sorry you have had such a hard time but you are obviously an amazingly strong woman. Onwards and upwards.

Fiderer Mon 30-Dec-13 18:24:37

I'm back in the UK on holiday and spoke to Zombie on the phone last night. She is very lovely indeed.

tardis flowers tardis

usualsuspect Mon 30-Dec-13 18:25:32

I like tripping over zombies limbs all over MN.


weebarra Mon 30-Dec-13 18:31:17

I always look out for your posts Zombie. I'm currently doing the whole aggressive bc thing - hope I can be as sorted as you seem to be!

rockybalboa Mon 30-Dec-13 18:31:23

Oooh, I'm very nosey and have been dying to ask but didn't dare. What an awful lot to have to go through, glad MN and the Zombie have provided you with a coping mechanism. All the best for 2014 thanks

HicDraconis Mon 30-Dec-13 18:31:40

#teamzombie for the win!

Always struck by how much crap you've been through and how you retain your dignity, sense of humour and excellent advice.

monkeyfacegrace Mon 30-Dec-13 18:31:45

Zombie is 60?

Surely thats a flaw. Zombie must be at least 600.

though I always thought 40's

DavidHarewoodsFloozy Mon 30-Dec-13 18:32:04

Hello Zombie me love, hard to keep a good thing down!.

Zombie completely unrelated, but aaagges ago on a thread, did you say, that you knew the two women in "Greygables" documentry? Or have I made that up? who knows I think im menopausal.

They,re or were Jackie O's cousins, can the Zombie tell us how she knew these delightfully eccentric duo?

Thankyou Zombie.

nickeldonkeyonadustyroad Mon 30-Dec-13 18:37:19

I like best that we know it's you and not a zombie namchanger by the 3rd person.

it's a lot to deal with in life and you're so strong.

ChineseFireball Mon 30-Dec-13 18:52:16

Thank you others, I was curious but didn't like to ask in case it was prying.

You have dealt so well with so much. I'd like to join the pompom wavers on team Zombie grin

AndIFeedEmGunpowder Mon 30-Dec-13 18:56:16

Wow, what a tough year for you. Here's to a brilliant 2014 for Zombie. [brain-eating emoticon]

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