So HR told me my flexible working request has been refused. I asked to stay at my current number of office days rather than increase in line with the updated policy. In the meeting with HR I got quite upset as this impacts time with my children, which is already limited due to shared custody, but also my mum died in traumatic circumstances very recently and this tipped me over the edge.
The HR person has sent a short message to ask me how I am and to let them know if they can support me. I have no idea how to reply. The honest answer is I'm not ok. I'm struggling to cope with mum's death and everything that goes with it, my dad died at the start of 2025 so I'm still processing that, and facing extra time in the office just feels too much, it's the final straw. I am already getting counselling. The only thing work could do is grant my flexible working request, which they've made it clear they won't do.
At the same time, I don't want to be rude and continue to ignore the message because I don't know how to respond. I feel a bit pathetic for asking, but can anyone give me some idea of what I could say by way of reply without getting emotional again?
Just editing to add I actually enjoy my job and working has helped me as I process my grief and trauma, I'd be no good if I got signed off so am not contemplating that at all. I'm also the main breadwinner in my home, my partner earns half what I do, so I can't cut my hours or anything.